E12. "A Community of Peers" - Would you cast the first stone?
STORY SUMMARY: Ex-military guy has his car break down and wanders into a remote village. A person is tied to a tree about to be stoned. The village elder says under the tradition of the community, if there is a stranger in town, they can cast the first stone. The person on the tree was fairly tried and convicted under their laws, but he won’t tell him the crime committed. He does throw the first stone and kills the man instantly. Later finds out the crime was pedophilia.
DISCUSSION: This was a really tough one for the group. On the one hand, we pay taxes and contribute to a justice system that punishes people, but we don’t know what each of them did. How do you know what this person did is worthy of death? How do you know if the justice system in this community is actually just? Does it matter if you are visiting the community, don’t you agree to abide by their laws? Would you need to know more? What if you aren’t allowed to? What if you change the scenario and they torture him until a foreigner can come to town to finish him off? Or if you do nothing they set the criminal free? What if your life is on the line if you refuse? Loads of spin offs that make this a really interesting question about cultural morality.
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“Would you cast the first stone?”
Kolby, Jeremy, and Jessica discuss the ethics in the short story, “A Community of Peers” by Dean Gessie.
Transcription (By: Transcriptions Fast)
A Community of Peers
(clap)
Kolby: Hi.
(clap)
Kolby: You are…
(laughter)
Kolby: Hi. Welcome back to After Dinner Conversation. The cackling you hear is Jessica. I am a co-host Kolby. Jeremy is here as always.
Jeremy: Hi, I’m Jeremy.
Kolby: And we are once again, for the 12th episode now.
Jeremy: Oooooh.
Jessica: 12. So now you know how to count? We’re growing.
Jeremy: So, impressed.
Kolby: Growing as a person.
Jessica: We’re growing.
Kolby: Ya, no, that’s why I had to wear flip-flops, so I could see the toes.
Jeremy: So, you could count to 12?
(laughter)
Kolby: I counted my teeth.
(Laughter)
Kolby: Alabama, they can only count to 7.
Jessica: Oh, stop it. Alabama, we love you.
Kolby: Sure. So, anyways, After Dinner Conversation is short stories for long conversations like the ones we have all the time. And it’s meant to be read by you and your friends, talked about, discussed, built up some ideas form the stories, some morals, figure out if you’ve got something you want to submit, if you like what you’re hearing, you’re like, “I’m a writer, I can do this.” Then please do. Send something in, and if we like it, we’ll publish it. And if we like it even more, well discuss it. And it’ll be one of the things it’s on our thing. If you want to read them, you can go to Amazon or to our website Afterdinnerconversation.com. By all means, please “like” and “subscribe” to the podcast, YouTube, video, whatever you’re watching. And thank you for joining us.
Jessica: Where are we at?
Kolby: We are at La…. See, I always forget one thing every week.
Jessica: That’s okay.
Kolby: We are, once again, for the 12th episode in a row, I feel like we’re keeping Claritin in business. We are in La Gattara, where they have cats that are available for adoption. The sign over there says they are 509 adopted cats.
Jessica: 509.
Kolby: They just adopted 2 yesterday they told us. If you’re not ready to make that commitment to a cat, which doesn’t seem like a ton of commitment in my mind…
Jeremy: You could just hang out with them here.
Kolby: You could just come hang out with them here, pay $5 or $10, use the Wi-Fi, get a little work done, and they do have drinks. They’ve got, you know, Pepsi and water.
Jessica: And Frappuccino.
Kolby: And other stuff. Yeah, so it’s a fun place. And the lady is super nice too. We are also joined as profession heckler, by Ashley, who was in our first 4 episodes, who will be taking over again for Jessica, since this is Jessica’s last episode
Jessica: For forever?
Kolby: No, not forever.
Jessica: This is my favorite cat. This is Hemingway. He’s a pretty boy.
Ashley: I’m just here for the cats by the way.
Jessica: This is my favorite **** by the way.
(laughter)
Kolby: Yeah, so anyways, we’re doing this one, and then Ashley will be back in probably for the next episode and we’ll go from there. Oh hello.
Jessica: Hemingway, you’re the best...
Kolby: Hemingway is very cute. So, our story is actually a special edition I suppose in that we had our first writing contest.
Jessica: Yes, oh yeah.
Kolby: And we got quite a few submissions, more than I would have thought for a first writing contest. And we pared them down to some good ones and down to some great ones and them part them down to this one, which is both good and great, particularly in that it really provided a lot of good fodder. Raw material for what we do.
Jeremy: For conversations.
Kolby: For conversations, yea. And so, the writing is, I think, you know, it’s good but the it’s really the…
Jessica: …the dilemma.
Kolby: …the dilemma, that when we talked about it we were like, “Yeah, we could definitely talk about this.”
Jeremy: This one for a while.
Kolby: For a little while at least. So, it’s a “Community of Peers” by Dean Gessie. Also, if you’ve got, we’d probably have another writing competition going on at some point, so check back on the website. I don’t think this will be the last writing competition we do. The submission was super cheap. It was like $20. We’re not making any money, we’re actually losing money, but we got us some good submissions, so it was worth it. So, “A Community of Peers” by Dean Gessie. I did such a bad time at our last…
Jeremy: No, you get to do this one again.
Kolby: I get to do it again. Just keep doing it until you get it right.
Jessica: This is practice.
Kolby: This is practice. Perfect practice makes perfect. Okay, so this one is really, it’s an impressionistic in that as I read it, I was like, “I think we’re here, I think we’re here”, and so you get sort of glimpses of what’s going on as opposed to a really clear A-to-B-to-C. But the general gist of it is, is it’s a person, who I guess was in a war? For some reason I assumed Vietnam. That was a totally made-up assumption on my part. But they’re going from, sort of, wherever they are in this fictional place, they’re in the jungle, they’re driving a car, gets stuck in the mud, they abandon the car. The person very easily abandoned their rental car. Apparently, they paid for the extra coverage.
(laughter)
Kolby: And they continue to wander into what effectively, from a literary standpoint, is an isolated one-off jungle community that doesn’t really have to interact much with the outside society. He finds some people, they bring him in. And when they bring him in, they find there’s a person, a man, tied to a tree. And there’s a bunch of people standing around with a basket of stones. They’re going all Bible on them. And the community leader comes forward and says, which I think is an odd thing, “Oh, are you new here?” And it’s like, “Alright, I just wandered in from the jungle. I clearly don’t look like all of you.”
Jeremy: He says, “Are you a foreigner?”
Kolby: Yeah, “You’re a foreigner’ and it’s like, “Yeah, I’m sorry, unless we’re from Southwest United States, I have an accent.”
Jessica: yeah, right.
Kolby: But whatever, the guys’ a foreigner and so he says, “Oh, because we want to perpetuate our morals and values and government system, we have a rule here that on days where we have executions, the foreigner is the first one to throw the stone.” Because they do stoning’s here. “And you can be the one to throw the first stone. And we didn’t have a foreigner here before” god knows why, “but since you’re here, batter up.”
Jeremy: It’s our way of including strangers in the life of the village.
Kolby: There you go. I mean, I feel like dinner would be….
(laughter)
Kolby: You know, good, maybe a soccer match. But every culture is different. I don’t judge. This is not my judgement face.
Jessica: This is my judgment face.
Kolby: So, the guy basically says, like, “Look, I’m not going to stone someone I don’t know.” To which the village elder says, “Well, don’t you have the death penalty in your country?” I assume this guy is from Texas because his response is, “Yes, we kill people all the time in my country.” Texas has a very active death penalty.
Jessica: Yes.
Kolby: And he says, “Well, do you know what all those people do?” He’s like, “Of course, I don’t. I just know they had a trial on a jury and they were found guilty under our laws.” And this person is like, “We had a trial, and a jury and he was found guilty under our laws, so what’s the problem?” And much to my surprise as a reader, the guy does it. He just like, picks up a giant softball sized smooth stone. Apparently, it’s like a perfectly round stone, so I guess it’s like the stoning stone.
Jessica: Right. Ceremonial stoning stone.
Jeremy: Beans him.
Kolby: And just beans him right in the head. Kills him instantly. It’s like a cow in like a factory or something. The guy immediately dies. Nobody else throws a stone because he’s dead and they all just dropped their stones and leave. Now, my first thought when I read this was, “It’s a trap.”
(Laughter)
Kolby: It was like…
Jeremy: This is going to go south.
Kolby: “We were testing you to see if you’re the kind of guy that would stone some random guy tied to a tree and you failed the test.” It turns out it wasn’t.
Jessica: Or won.
Kolby: Or won the test. Turns out it wasn’t a test. They weren’t trying to stone him to maul him, they were stoning him just to kill him and when he’s dead, there’s no reason to continue stoning so, that’ it. And then at the end of the story you find out the person was a convicted, I believe, of rape?
Jessica: Yeah.
Jeremy: Yeah.
Kolby: Which I guess is why, well, it’s a really weird sort of thing, that only the women were standing around waiting to stone him.
Jeremy: And they wouldn’t tell him beforehand.
Kolby: He asked, “What did he do?” He’s like, “Doesn’t matter”.
Jeremy: Right, he was tried.
Kolby: You got to do it blind.
Jessica: Right. Which seemed to be something about the law...
Kolby: And I get it in this sense, if you believe in the system, then you don’t need to know the details. But if you just wander into a community and you’re told to take on faith that the system is uncorrupt, that’s a huge leap that you’re just going to be like, ‘Yeah, I believe in the system, that I’m not a member of, that I did not contribute to, that I do not vote in, that I’m not even culturally aware of, but you told me that it’s a non-corrupt system, so yea, batters up”. So, there’s a couple things I really liked about this story. I know there were a couple things Jessica, that you were frustrated with, you mentioned. But one of the things I liked about it, is it kept going where I wasn’t expecting it to go. I didn’t expect them not to tell them what the guy had done. Because I thought his problem would be, honestly, I thought the problem was going to be, you’re about to get killed for something that isn’t death-penalty worthy in my country. So maybe it was jaywalking or something. Wow, there’s cat.
Jeremy: Cat fighting over here.
Kolby: Cat MMA fighting in the corner.
Jessica: Yeah.
Kolby: I thought that would’ve been an interesting twist because now you’re saying, “Look, I value your system, therefore value your outcomes, even if it’s personally against my values because I think the punishment is extreme.” And so, the fact they didn’t tell him, I was like, “Oh, that’s an interesting choice, that I thought was perfectly fine, and the I was also surprised that at the end they do tell him.
Jessica: They do tell him after everything.
Kolby: Because I feel it would have left that hanging moment of like, “Maybe I just killed someone for jaywalking?” But it somehow absolves him, at least at some level, assuming he believes…
Jeremy: That he knows it was a fully valid reason for him.
Kolby: Right.
Jeremy: But what if it had been a valid reason, a valid law, that had been a codified law of their moral structure but, for something really bizarre that he did not agree too.
Kolby: Like an offense to the gods.
Jeremy: Something that he didn’t consider to be a crime.
Kolby: You reached for food with your left hand, and left hand is an unholy hand.
Jessica: And I just want to point out its pedophilia.
Kolby: Oh, was it?
Jessica: It was rape of a young child. But pedophilia is not a death penalty worthy crime in the United States.
Kolby: Not in the united states.
Jessica: So, it is a crime we would not kill someone.
Kolby: Many readers would be comfortable with it being a death penalty case.
Jeremy: Does it change the way you feel about the story if it had been something that he did not consider a great crime?
Kolby: Or that you personally do not consider a great crime?
Jessica: I mean, I don’t know if it would’ve changed my feeling about the story because I genuinely cannot fathom… I think there’s a couple things, one, I cannot fathom not understanding a system before I threw a stone. I couldn’t. I can’t fathom that. I don’t understand that motivation. But, also, we deal with a very corrupt justice system. The death penalty has huge problems and is a very corrupt system anyways and we’re still here to support it and be part of it. We’re not overthrowing the government.
Kolby: You still pay your taxes.
Jessica: I still pay my taxes.
Jeremy: Still show up for jury duty
Jessica: Yes, I still do all of that.
Kolby: Although with an attitude like that, you’ll never get selected, let me tell ya.
Jessica: I hope not.
(laughter)
Jessica: So, I think, that for me, I think that’s an interesting… but the other thing I still can’t get past, and I don’t understand and I want to talk about, is why not just underhand toss the stone at the dude? Like, why is it like a whaling where he kills the guy? Then it’s not your fault the guy…
Kolby: Like, you could’ve missed…
Jessica: Why is that he wails the guy in the temple and kills him?
Kolby: I feel like it’s more humane.
Jeremy: That is what the mayor tries to tell him is that…
Kolby: You don’t want a bunch of little league kids throwing balls, you want the pitcher.
Jessica: I guess? I don’t know. I think I would’ve underhand tossed it, humane or not.
Jeremy: Because he tells him
Kolby: Gone for a shoulder shot.
Jessica: I don’t know. Hit a big toe.
Jeremy: Somewhere in here…
Kolby: I’ve done that thing that’s a dunking tank. The fact that he hit the guy in the head on the first throw is a miracle. I’ve dropped $20 on those dunking tanks and never dunked anybody.
Jeremy: He says he’s only 10 feet away from his though. I suppose that’s the dunk tank. So he says the women with children will cast the first stone, if you choose not to, and that you have both the power and the ability to end the life of this criminal quickly or at the very least knock him unconscious so that the cleaning up is less painful for all concerned.
Jessica: I don’t’ know. I also think it’s a little bit of take not that we know it’s a pedophilia. I would probably be like, and he took it away from all those moms.
Kolby: I thought about that too.
Jessica: …that would’ve stoned the crap out of that guy.
Kolby: And they wouldn’t be aiming for the head.
Jessica: Nuh huh. I have a very specific thing I would be aiming at.
(laughter)
Jeremy: So, what about the idea that even though there’s a, what appears to be a codified legal system, that this is still just a mob justice?
Kolby: What do you mean mob justice?
Jeremy: Mob justice. This is the presumably the mob that tried him, like, this is the town that all this happened in.
Kolby: So, he couldn’t get an unbiased jury.
Jeremy: Right. So how it is really a jury of his peers of unbiased peers.
Kolby: Because you’d have to sort of move to another town because of the getting an unbiased jury would be impossible in that town. I hadn’t even thought about that.
Jeremy: So, this leads to another point, if he is stoned by the mothers with children, this is absolutely mob justice because he’s the executioner and doesn’t know this, does this suddenly become justice?
Jessica: Interesting.
Jeremy: Not to paraphrase from the Hateful 8.
Kolby: That’s a great point though.
Jeremy: The executioner is what turns this into justice as opposed to mob justice.
Jessica: I don’t know if it turns into justice because it’s not the executioner that is making that decision. The punishment is decided and the punishment is death. So, where that is just or not has already been decided but it is the humane, is it going to be done humanely or not? Because the executioner doesn’t know and wants to act in the most humane manner, he kills the convicted immediately.
Kolby: I really liked Jeremy’s point though. This goes to the idea of, If you’ve got the guy who swings that axe to behead you, do you first say, “Oh, let me hand the axe to the victim.” No, we don’t because we understand that act should be an impartial act. We need someone who is totally uninterested in the process.
Jessica: It is a great point. I don’t think it’s justice, I think its impartiality in humanity, but it is justice, yes. I can agree with that. And I do think that’s very interesting. And I think it’s a good motivation to withhold and then tell you later. I don’t think that the narrator writes whether, he’s relieved of the burden of whether this man… but also like, it’s still again, he feels like his burden is released of feeling guilty or not. But that assumes a society that we know that the system is just. Which I’m not sure of.
Jeremy: That this system is just. Because he still potentially was tried…
Jessica: By a mob.
Jeremy: Right.
Kolby: But I mean, in an isolated community, I’m not sure they had a better choice.
Jessica: Oh yeah. No.
Kolby: So, there’s, yes, it’s mob justice, but the assumption is that there are rules of evidence, that there are objections, that there’s a judge, they do jury that’s not one of the people. There’s some due process. And to the extent they could, they tried to do the best they could. And in that sense, it’s like okay. So, I’m going throw a stone for a second…. Oh, oh… is this a stone.
(cat placed on table)
Jessica: This is a stone. Just kidding. This is a kitty, a cute kitty.
Kolby: She’s already turning into a drull. One of my frustrations with this story I think the sort of odd tax that it took that surprised me, made me think more, the thing that I really just had a gut level, frustrated me about the main character is…
Jessica: … is he left that car in the swamp? Agreed.
Kolby: He struck me as a petty Instagram-mer.
(laughter)
Kolby: In the sense of, at no point do we get what would should have been at least a half a page internal dialogue… sorry, I spit on you there…
Jessica: That’s okay.
Kolby: An internal dialogue about like here is all of the things that are going into my weighing of my choice, right? And after I’ve done it, here are all of the ways that this choice has affected me. And maybe, it’s certainly possible the reason that’s not included, is because that gives away too much that we should be doing ourselves. Because if he doesn’t tell us what he thinks, then were forced to wonder what we think. But it comes off as so trite by not having it in there, that it was just a little bit jarring, although maybe useful.
Jessica: I do think it is a choice in the narration that you, to kind of, leave it in this empty space where we can have some time ….
Jeremy: To leave it ambiguous and put in our own feelings on the issue.
Jessica: Or even just to argue with his choice in our own heads. To be like, “Wait, wait, what are you doing?”
Kolby: And he doesn’t get to justify him as an unreliable narrator because we don’t get to hear his thoughts.
Jessica: Right. Exactly. Exactly.
Kolby: Jeremy, throw the stone?
Jeremy: I don’t know.
Kolby: That’s the first “I don’t know” you’ve had in a while. Probably since, what was the drug one?
Jeremy: No, no, I said yes on that one.
(laughter)
Jessica: That was a quick yes. I even remember that one.
Kolby: Alright, so this might be your first “I don’t know” in a while?
Jeremy: In the condition that’s put forward here, I would probably say no because you don’t really know the justice system that’s in place. Was he tried here? Was he tried in the next town over by his peers?
Kolby: Does trial in this culture mean, like we dumped him in water and he floated?
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: Floated or didn’t float or whatever.
Jeremy: And the narrator even says that, “I did not betray and smirk but I had seen more than once overwhelming and then disputable evidence blow up hospitals and schools.” Which, not entirely sure what he means by that.
Kolby: I think that’s the veteran part of him.
Jeremy: The veteran part.
Kolby: So, let me ask you this Jeremy.
Jeremy: Seems an odd response in that sense.
Kolby: What about the fact that, your choice to follow through or not follow through on the community justice is imposing your sort of cultural norms on their community’s morals and values?
Jeremy: That’s a whole another…
Kolby: So let’s say the trial, he said he got a fair and just trial, is actually like, they rolled a 20 sided di and one through 5 is not guilty, 6 thru 10 is guilty, 11 thru 20 is a hung jury, but in their culture, that is how that they have decided what justice means to them as a word and as a process. Who are you to say their justice system is wrong because you wandered into their community? They didn’t wander into yours.
Jeremy: So, you abstain at that point. If you don’t find their justice system valid, you don’t throw the stone.
Kolby: Yeah good thinking you don’t go to some other country and be like, “’I don’t find your red, yellow, green light system valid therefor I do not stop at street corners.”
Jeremy: That’s different...
Kolby: When you go to the community, don’t you accept that you are a part of that community’s value system?
Jessica: Okay.
Jeremy: No, you obey their laws but he even says you can abstain. And we’ll go about our normal system.
Kolby: Oh, that’s true.
Jeremy: I think in that case you abstain because it does violate your own moral code because you don’t find their justice system valid. In this case I don’t think that can apply to every case, but in this case.
Kolby: But aren’t you same guy you would say, “Yeah, you shouldn’t bribe the police or police shouldn’t take bribes?” But in their system where you underpay police, accepting bribes is part of the way they make a living.
Jeremy: Right, that’s a different case than this. I would pay the cop.
Kolby: Because it’s life or death versus cash?
Jeremy: Yeah.
Kolby: Again, with the moral relativism. I’m just saying. I’m just saying. Baseball back to the back of the head is what happens if you get sick. Jessica, what do you think?
Jessica: Do I throw the stone? No. I might do it underhand toss, I half-heartedly, you know, to be part of it, but I’m not throwing a stone.
Kolby: What if you’d gotten more of the story? What if they’re were like, “Look, we’ll suspend it for 24 hours so you can talk to who you need to talk to.”? But aren’t you becoming the jury?
Jessica: First of all, I didn’t agree to that, so don’t accuse me to becoming the jury.
Kolby: Well, no, but aren’t you then deciding if you believe enough in their system?
Jessica: I think that it doesn’t matter at that point. They’ve made a decision, it’s not whether or not I throw the stone, whether if this… this is a different story if it’s you throw the stone and if you decide not the throw this tone, he lives. He’s dying either way. It’s just whether if I’m participating in it. No, I’m not. I’ve very much against the death penalty, even for pedophiles. I’m against the death penalty. I think we can still study and learn from then and prevent future problems from happening. But I’m definitely not going to participate. I’m not going to throw the stone.
Kolby: Alright, let me give you another hypothetical, and you’re getting this one next.
Jeremy: Okay.
Jessica: Wait, you get a hypothetical. That not fair.
Kolby: So, let’s say you go to another country, you pick whatever country, and you realize the massage parlors are not massage parlors, that they’re for a little something extra.
Jessica: So, San Diego great.
Kolby: But it’s totally not really legal, it’s not a thing, it’s socially acceptable, everyone knows, it’s not a hidden under the table sort of thing, maybe technically illegal, but whatever. And your brother, sister, husband, whoever, is like, “Look, it’s totally fine here.” Do you then say, “No, no, no, you don’t get to go native because you and I have decided that we’re not native?”
Jessica: So, the idea is do I …. So is the hypothetical, to put it more generally, if I go to a country and I disagree with whatever system, they’ve set up, and
Kolby: You get to continually to both abstain and encourage others from your culture that are with you to abstain. What if your husband was like, “Toss me the stone.” Would be you be like, ‘Honey, no, no you don’t get to toss the stone.”
Jessica: I don’t know. I think that’d be up to them. It depends on if it affects me. What your proposing with the stone is if I give him the stone and he throws it and hits and kills that person, that’s something he gets to live with. It’s not something that affects me. But if it’s he throws the stone…
Kolby: And he gets chlamydia at the massage parlors…
Jessica: Right, or anything, and that would affect me and it would have to be a discussion. But, just to throw a stone, no. I would not make… I don’t know. I get to make my own decision. I would say like death penalty is terrible. Just like I would be like, “Wouldn’t it be great if we all ate less meat?” I’m trying to influence you in a certain direction I think we all need to go in, but I’m not saying you can’t do that.
Kolby: Jeremy?
Jeremy: I generally agree with that. You do try to influence based on the information that’s available.
Kolby: And so, if the person you’re with is like, “Hey, we’re in the red-light district in Amsterdam, like sorry dude, I want to swing by.” You’re like, “You know it’s illegal in America or it’s considered immoral in America or whatever, but here it’s okay, so yeah man, I’ll meet you back at 11 o’clock.”
Jeremy: But it still depends on the decision that we have, between us.
Jessica: It’s the relationship between the two people. If we’re talking about Amsterdam 20 years ago. Pot was not legal in the United States anywhere. You go to Amsterdam, smoke it. That’s illegal but it’s legal there. Is that a moral judgment? No, it’s their laws. Although sometimes laws are codifications of morals, they’re not always, there are sometimes just stupid laws. I don’t think sex workers should be punished for having a profession as a sex worker. So, I’m not going to judge if there’s a red-light district. I would like to make sure that everybody’s taken care of but that’s more of a me making sure that women are okay. But I don’t think there’s a moral judgement. Now, if I’m with somebody and we’re in a monogamous relationship…
Jeremy: That’s different…
Jessica: There’s a different story there.
Kolby: Are there versions of this story that you would have liked to have read? That you think would’ve asked other questions that you would like to have answered? I can think of an example, while you guys are thinking, I’ll think of an example. So, for example, if it had been the version you’re talking about, because there’s a foreigner in the community you’re the only one that can kill him...
Jessica: You’re the decider.
Kolby: Maybe not the decider, but you’re the…
Jeremy: You’re the only one.
Kolby: You’re the only one that can be the axe man. And if you choose not to, he was still found guilty.
Jeremy: Instead of walking in and they’ve got him tied to the tree, they have a prison full of prisoners, these three guys are on death row waiting for a stranger to come in, to be impartial executioner.
Kolby: We’re waiting for a foreigner. We don’t want the burden in our community. Because all of us are wrapped up in it. And if you don’t do it…
Jeremy: Then they’re just going to sit here until the next guy.
Jessica: So, Jeremy what do you do? Jeremy what do you do? You already used up your “I don’t know”
(laughter)
Jeremy: Yeah, as an impartial executioner, that is a tough one.
Jessica: Would you really?
Jeremy: I don’t know.
Jessica: I feel like you would. I feel like your face says you would.
Kolby: Here is the other thing: you don’t know how cruel the next person might be. The next person might see it as sporting to sort of hit them in non-vital areas for hours. You could be the humane one in this story.
Jeremy: How do you execute them? No, you have to stone them. I think that’d be really rough.
Jessica: Because you’d be a terrible baseball player.
Jeremy: Yeah. Well, no, just stoning somebody to death. You’re not going to kill them on the first one.
Jessica: This one got killed on the first one.
Kolby: I think he got lucky.
Jessica: He got lucky, okay.
Kolby: Are there versions of this, Jessica, that you think would put you more in the gray line area?
Jessica: I think, if we escalated the prison’s scenario that Jeremy gave us, there’s three prisoners waiting execution, and if they don’t…
Kolby: I’m getting questions from Ashley.
Jessica: Oh, Ashley’s giving us questions. Okay. If he was in prison, and being tortured, I think I would have an easier time deciding to kill people that are being tortured.
Jeremy: Even if it’s not tortured but solitary confinement. We have each of these guys.
Jessica: Which is torture. But if their well-being is taken care of, I would absolutely say no. I would be like, “No, you wait till the next person.” I’m okay because I just would not make that decision. I’m hoping that society evolves between me and the next foreigner that comes, that they decide the death penalty is a terrible idea, and they get rid of it and they decide lifelong imprisonment, or whatever or rehabilitation or whatever they decide. I think I would still have trouble executing someone because of that. However, if they’re being tortured and I’m witnessing it, I feel that that is no inhumane, it might move me to kill someone.
Kolby: What if it wasn’t death penalty? What if they’re like, “Look, our punishment in this case is getting a hand chopped off.”
Jessica: Uhh.
Kolby: So now…
Jeremy: You’re still the impartial party.
Kolby: And now it’s not something that I know you have a problem with is the death penalty.
Jessica: Right, right, right.
Kolby: It’s something, maybe you don’t believe in taking off a hand, but whatever, or maybe it’s a branding of this sin, right? So that people know.
Jessica: Well, does it happen if I say no?
Kolby: Yeah, of course.
Jessica: Well, then I say no. Why in any of these situations would anybody say yes? There’s a line.
Kolby: Instagrammer said yes.
Jessica: There’s a line waiting for people to brand this person, you’re first, do you want to go? No, Okay. Next person.
Jeremy: But you’re the stranger and we can’t do it because none of us are impartial, we need the first stranger to come through to perform the punishment.
Kolby: It would make all of us feel good to punish this person therefore we cannot be the person who punishes them.
(Ashley asking question off camera)
Jessica: So, Ashley asked, what if you get punished for not punishing them? What if I die if I don’t kill them? I’ll kill them. Not a problem.
Kolby: Really?
Jessica: Absolutely.
Kolby: That’s not the answer I expected.
Jessica: Really?
Kolby: Ashley also wrote on the piece of paper; he’s a veteran and he’s probably killed people before in other situations. So, in that sense, it’s not like, he at some point had made this decision, like, “Killing people at times is what we do”
Jeremy: It’s what we do, but again I feel that’s very situational as well, even for soldiers where...
Kolby: Because there’s been some theoretical declaration of war.
Jeremy: Right. And they have rules of engagement.
Kolby: Alright. Well, sorry Ashley, we tried. We tried.
Ashley: What if the first person to throw is under 18, or never killed before, or was a child? What if they go to the front of the line?
Kolby: Do they have a fast pass from Disney land?
Jessica: So, Ashley’s question is if the foreigner was a child.
Jeremy: A minor.
Jessica: I don’t know. I think that’s awful, that’d be a messed-up society.
Kolby: That’s a screwed-up society to do that. Alright, so you’ve been listening to After Dinner Conversation. We went a little bit long on this one surprisingly. We’ve been pretty good about sticking to a half an hour but we went a little bit over, sorry about that. After Dinner Conversation, short stories for long discussions. If you enjoyed this, please “like” and “subscribe”. Please listen to other ones too. There’s like a backlog now. And all of them ask really interesting good questions, mostly involving Jessica picking on me. Or cats. Also, if you’ve got a story you want to submit, submit it to your website afterdinnerconversation.com. Download these stories on our website or Amazon, or whoever e-books are sold, or podcasts are done, or YouTube. We basically have populated the Earth with these things. So yeah, and thank you for joining us. And I think this might be our last La Gattara one. I think our next one might be from a different location. It’s possible.
Jessica: Will there be puppies?
Kolby: Man, I hope there are puppies. Man, I hope there are puppies.
Jeremy: Let’s find that.
Kolby: We need to find a puppy place.
Jessica: La Pupparia.
Kolby: La Pupparia. La Canine-ria.
Jeremy: Not a puppymill. That’s different.
Kolby: A puppymill. That’s not the same. If you want to adopt any of these cats, just come on down. It’s La Gattara in Tempe, Arizona. They are all available for adoption. If you don’t have the commitment yet to adopt one, you can pay $10. They got Wi-Fi, you can sit and hang out, and I guarantee you’ll get a cat who sits on your keyboard.
Jessica: Yes.
Jeremy: Yes.
Kolby: Guaranteed. And It’s just a great cause. So, thank you for joining us again.
Jessica: See ya next time!
Jeremy: See ya next time.
Kolby: Wherever that may be.
E11. "Rainbow People Of The Glittering Glade" - Does society have the right to tell you you’re worthless?
STORY SUMMARY: Three wards are sent by the Kingdom through shifting deserts to find a rumored people that have rainbow skin. As they get closer they see people in the desert turned to stone, and others nearly stone that simply repeat the same simple task over and over again. One member of their group is injured so they get to the rainbow people in need of medical attention. They learn that anyone who lives in the community will slowly turn to stone unless the community deems them of value and allows them to take place in a ritual. One member of the group does the ritual and joins the community, one refuses and turns to stone, and one goes back home to tell the tale.
DISCUSSION: Fascinating story about how a society places value on certain kinds of work. Is certain work more valuable then other work? Must you work and contribute to society to be of value? What if you just don’t want to work, are you a bad person? Is it okay to just enjoy life? Also, there are faith discussions in the story. The one person opted to turn to stone rather than join a group with another faith. Does this mean she isn’t of value because she is faithful to her truth?
BOOK LINK: Download the accompanying short story here.
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“Does society have the right to tell you you’re worthless?”
Kolby, Jeremy, and Jessica discuss the ethics in the short story, “Rainbow People Of The Glittering Glade” by David Shultz.
Transcript (By: Transcriptions Fast)
Rainbow People of the Glittering Glade
Kolby: Okay. And welcome back to episode, I believe, 11 now.
Jessica: 11.
Kolby: Of After Dinner Conversation short stories for long discussions. I am your co-host Kolby with…
Jeremy: Jeremy.
Jessica: Jessica.
Kolby: And Jeremy is wearing a shirt from where we are today.
Jeremy: From La Gattara.
Kolby: From La Gattara. Yeah, where all these cats, except for this one who is like a permanent resident, are available for...
Jeremy: For adoption.
Kolby: For adoption. Yes. Or you can come and just pay some money to hang out with them. After Dinner Conversation is a podcast as well as a website as well as Amazon e-books including the book we’re talking about today, “The Rainbow People of the Glittering Glade.”
Kolby: And so, we’ll...
Jeremy: By.
Kolby: By… that’s a great question Jeremy. Hello kitty, you’re sitting on my...
Jeremy: It’s in here, David Shultz.
Kolby: Thank you. The cat’s sitting on my thing there, which you’re allowed too. Keep sitting kitten. Right. And so, you can download those, read those, you ideally should read them beforehand, before listening to the podcast.
Jessica: I’d say this one in particular.
Jeremy: In particular, yes.
Jessica: It’s a lengthy piece but totally worth it. It is a fantastic story.
Kolby: Yeah.
Jessica: And we’re going to be, I think, diving deep into this one about the world that was created and so I think you really need to read before you…
Kolby: And I would say for me, we’ve had a lot of stories that I’ve liked, certainly I’ve liked the discussions of all of the stories and all the questions asked. This is one of the stories where I just really loved it. Like, I read it and I wanted to talk to people about it and I wanted to ask questions about it and we were trying to like hold off on our conversation before we started taping so we didn’t talk about it beforehand. Yeah, I feel like this sets a new bar probably for some of the best submissions we’ve gotten.
Jeremy: It’s really well written. It’s an interesting topic. Really well development of characters.
Jessica: The world building is really good.
Kolby: And it’s longer which is usually hard to keep up that sort of level of interest for that, you know? It’s easy to do like a 3-page story that’s one question. This is a 15-page story that asks 15 questions. It’s just really solid. And so, I think that I drew the short straw this time?
Jessica: You did.
Kolby: Okay, so, I am not as good as Jeremy or Jessica at...
Jessica: I’m not good.
Kolby: …at the summaries, but I will try and summarize. So, basically, we’re in a sort of fictional world where it maybe has like other stuff going on. It’s probably other worldly but it’s intentionally vague about it. And three people on behalf of the kingdom are sent to the Shifting Desert to find a rumored community that is violating the social norms of society and that they’re practicing slavery, and I think there’s human sacrifices, and just, you know, cats and dogs living together. And so, they wander through the desert to find this hidden place in kind of a Lewis and Clark exploration kind of thing. It makes it even more interesting in that because of the plate tectonics of where they are, which is why you kind of think it’s probably not on earth, there are minor plate tectonics. And so, even if you’re walking in a straight line, the ground underneath you literally can slowly be moving you off course because the tectonics are shifting all the time. And so, it’s particularly hard to find this community. The three of them get to the community. In the process, I think two of them become inured, one from a sprained ankle or something.
Jessica: Broken arm.
Jeremy: And the other bit by a snake.
Kolby: By a venomous snake, so they sort of stumble into the community on their last leg with not much, and running out of water and they’re just in bad shape.
Jessica: One is like a warrior.
Kolby: Yeah.
Jessica: One is like a religious person.
Kolby: Right. I feel like we’re talking about Dungeons and Dragons classes, right? And one is a dwarf. No.
Jessica: One is a cleric, yea.
Jeremy: One is the government envoy, the scholar.
Jessica: The scholar.
Jeremy: The warrior.
Jessica: And the religious person, the cleric.
Kolby: The religious person, scholar, and warrior.
Jessica: Yes.
Kolby: And so, one of the things that’s interesting is sort of is the teaser in it is as they get closer to the community, they start to see statues out in the desert.
Jessica: Pure white.
Kolby: Pure white. Like marble looking like statues that are exact replicas of people. And then as they get closer to the community, the statues are moving but only in a repetitive pattern. So, it’s just like one short motion. Like, kind of like “Chuck-e-Cheese”, right? Just one sort of thing over and over again.
Jessica: Like an automaton or something.
Kolby: Yeah. But they can’t talk to them or communicate with them and they not as marbleized. They have an ashen look to them. And this is all of course very freaky to them. When they stumble into the community, the community takes him in and you learn the story of what’s going on. And in essence…
Jessica: Oh, and, sorry.
Kolby: Yeah, go ahead.
Jessica: I was going to say, they heal them.
Kolby: Oh, that’s right. They heal them of course. Way better healing abilities than they have.
Jeremy: Than the cleric has.
Jessica: Than the cleric has. And the cleric is the only that’s not injured. The warrior and the scholar are the ones that are injured. And as they are healing, they learn more about this community.
Kolby: Right, because they can’t leave immediately because it takes 3-4 days or a week for their sort of wounds to heal up, so they can’t just immediately return. So, one of the things they find out in sort of their research to bring back to the kingdom is that being in the community is a double-edged sort of thing. One- you get all of these sorts of great knowledge and great things and you live in this sort of idyllic community in the desert that is, you know, they don’t know war and they don’t really know famine and they all have goals and purpose. But, you will slowly stone-ify, for lack of a better term, and you will become one of the people they saw when they were coming in. And as you turn to stone, you will want to, through whatever process this curse has, makes you want to isolate yourself from the community. So, the people that are just outside the community are the ones who are more recently sort of stone-afying and they can still move a little bit. And the ones that are farther out from the community are the ones who have totally turned to stone and are now essentially dead, which I believe, what are they called? They said…
Jeremy: They’re called “the drull”
Kolby: “The Drull”, D-R-U-L-L is how they spell it. And so, you immediately have this immediate process, immediately starts within days unless you are accepted by the community. And the way the community…
Jeremy: Well, it’s explained to them that...
Kolby: They have to have value, right?
Jeremy: It’s the because of the magic in the area. And I think it’s even presented as magic, that this is the cause of this. This is the power that heals you but it also turns you to stone.
Jessica: Right, yeah. It’s inevitable if you don’t have...
Kolby: If you don’t go through this process. And so, the only, everyone in the community can be a part of this process to not turn to stone, but they have to be, sort of, selected or voted on by a panel of elders.
Jeremy: By the community. Judged valid.
Kolby: Yeah, who judge valid. And all three people that wanted in are judged valid.
Jeremy: Because of their credibility.
Jessica: Judged worthy.
Kolby: The scholar because of his scholarship. The warrior because of his athletic prowess. And the cleric because of their devotion to God, even though it’s not their God, totally fine. And so, they take them down into the inner chamber where there is a giant floating crystal that is so perfect. It’s like a God figure crystal. And then they, for lack of a better term…
Jeremy: They get a tattoo out of one…
Kolby: They kill one of the drulls.
Jessica: It sucks up the essence of the drull into the crystal. Yeah. And then…
Kolby: And then becomes ink.
Jessica: Becomes like a tattoo machine.
Kolby: And they tattoo it on their forehead.
Jeremy: On their forehead is the one that keeps them alive.
Jessica: It’s a seal.
Kolby: Right. And that keeps them from ever stone-ifying. And the scholar and the warrior choose to take the serum or the magic thing, and the religious person because of their religious belief, chooses not to.
Jessica: I would not say we are clear why she chooses not to.
Kolby: That’s true.
Jessica: You say it’s because of religious beliefs. That’s never articulated.
Jeremy: It’s sort of articulated.
Kolby: Maybe I just assumed it.
Jessica: I disagree that it’s articulated. Show me in the story.
Kolby: Jeremy’s going to start sorting through. And so, then they heal up, and you go back and you realize that the story that you’re reading is the letter that the emissary, the main sort of emissary person, the scholar, has given to the warrior to return to the king. Because the scholar has chosen to go native, and live in the community. The warrior has chosen to go back and use some of that technology to help them in war.
Jessica: So, I want to clarify that point. So, after the seal, they also can get additional tattoos that will enable them to become better warriors or better whatever…
Kolby: Allows them to run faster.
Jessica: Run faster.
Kolby: Go longer without water
Jessica: It was almost like photosynthesis. You lived off of the rays of the sun.
Kolby: It also sounds complicated; this is why we’re saying this is one of the stories you should definitely read.
Jessica: And then the price is that you have to go find one the drulls and bring it back in order to get these additional powers.
Kolby: And one of the things they talked about, ideally you should be the one to pick the drull.
Jessica: Correct.
Kolby: And I think, to me, the implication was you shouldn’t pick randomly. It should somehow to be related to the meaning to the tattoo that you’re doing, or meaning to you.
Jeremy: Meaning to you or the skill that you want.
Kolby: Yeah, some personal attachment to you. And the drull gets the sort of life sucked out and it gets turned into, its blood or whatever, gets turned into more tattooing. And you get the tattoo from the essence of the drull and give you the ability to run faster or jump higher or whatever.
Jessica: So, I cut you off, and then at the end of the story, it’s the letter going back to the kingdom, the scholar has gone native, the warrior’s going back, and the cleric is a drull now.
Kolby: Has become a stone, or is almost to the process, or pretty close to the process. And so, you’re essentially, you’re reading so much, you don’t know at the beginning, so much, but you’re reading the story from the emissary to the king about why, here’s what I saw and, by the way, I’m not coming home.
Jessica: Yes. Yeah. Yeah. He’s totally. Yeah.
Jeremy: Okay, so we’re both right.
Kolby: Oh, let’s hear it.
Jeremy: Okay, Syrena refused the seal. Syrena’s the cleric. There’s little that I can say of her reasons for doing so, which were expressed not in terms of logical rationales, but rather emotional aversion and visceral distaste. So, we see his view of what her reasons are, is an emotional reason not to do it. I attribute her attitude to her strength of her devotion to her faith. It is to her credit that she resolved, even in the face of such beauty, to abstain from what had been offered. This is a rare and commendable ability, perhaps one that is honed by fasting in case chastity, the regular refusal of our natural inclinations.
Jesica: Okay.
Kolby: So, it doesn’t outright say it but, you’re kind of like, “Ehhh.”
Jessica: Well, he thinks it’s religious.
Jeremy: It’s his impression.
Kolby: But it might not be.
Jessica: But it was an emotional and visceral reaction.
Kolby: So, can I just talk briefly one of the things this writer does and I thought, “Wow. Like, I’ve never read that.” He does it a couple of times where he doesn’t do like a “he said- she said- he said- she said”. Instead he does something like, “We had a conversation, while I don’t remember everything, here’s what I took away from it.” And it’s sort of like he’s paraphrasing the conversation for you, which once you realize it’s a letter, makes perfect sense that it wouldn’t be a “he said- she said”, it’s not the way you write letters and stuff the way you remember stuff. I thought that was a really apt tool.
Jessica: That was an apt tool. I also think it’s a great tool to indicate perhaps bias. Right? Like, this is what I took away from a conversation, “Oh, I’m not going to see that conversation? Okay. This is your take on the conversation which is just the good bits that you think.”
Jeremy: It comes back to the idea of the unreliable narrator. We have to take his word on it. It’s his story; his version of what happened. Now, they can talk to the warrior who returns to corroborate.
Kolby: I think the warrior for sure would’ve had a different take on it, right?
Jeremy: Yeah.
Kolby: When I read this, I kept making me thinking of like reading some of the Lewis and Clark primary sources. Where it’s like, I know you’re trying to be faithful to what you saw and I get that you’re trying but I also get that you’ve never…
Jessica: Never seen this before, experienced this.
Kolby: Right. So, I appreciate the effort but I’m not, you know…
Jeremy: Exactly.
Kolby: Jeremy…?
Jeremy: I really like this story.
Kolby: Yeah, you also liked it a lot. We’re unanimous on this one.
Jeremy: Yea, it’s a great story. I love the way it’s presented, the way the culture is presented, the way you’ve given these 3 different views of what’s going on and three different options.
Kolby: Choose your own adventure book.
Jeremy: In some ways.
Kolby: I would read this story 2 more times from the other two characters perspectives.
Jeremy: Absolutely.
Jessica: Yeah.
Jeremy: Just to see what they’re take on it is it would be great. If you’re listening...
(laughter)
Kolby: If you’re listening writer… please!
Jessica: Get a little Canterbury Tales aspect, right? 3 pilgrims, different takes.
Jeremy: What’s the Kurasawa movie with the 4 versions…?
Kolby: So, you go Kurasawa and I was going to go with that one where they the car wreck, where the 4 different people all come to the car wreck and leave the same.
Jeremy: They based it off the other one.
Kolby: They based it off of that? Whatever. Jeremy, I’m curious, so there are some ethics. I mean, obviously we’re gushing over the writing because it’s gushing worthy, but there are some ethics issues.
Jeremy: Absolutely.
Kolby: What did you think of the Drull? As you’re reading it and thinking about it, what was your opinion about…?
Jeremy: Well, it’s interesting because it’s the society that decides whether or not you’re worth of getting this tattoo.
Kolby: I should also mention one other thing too, you don’t start to stone-ify unless you’ve hit puberty. So, it’s not like a baby has to prove its worthiness. You’ve got like…
Jeremy: It’s a little like Logan’s Run in that way.
Kolby: You’ve got 14 years to know what’s coming, and to like mentally get yourself to be like, “Look, I’ve got to up my game. I got to prove myself”, because then that age is when it starts to happen. So, you’re choosing at some level the effort you’re putting in to creating your worthiness.
Jeremy: Well, that’s a real pressure. It’s not just like, you get into a good college or not.
Kolby: You want to talk about a final exam?
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: That way is worse than the AIMS test.
Jeremy: Yeah, it is an ethical conundrum because, again, it’s the society that’s determining your worthiness. So it isn’t, you know, shifting morals and shifting values. How do you know? It’s not like there’s an SAT you have to pass.
Kolby: What if you focus on a good mile time and it turns out you don’t need milers anymore?
Jeremy: Exactly.
(laughter)
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: But you get the impression that they’re not, because they were really free to give it to the three people that came in…
Jessica: But, but, but… those are three outsiders that can go report back and get people to come and kill them. It’s three. And they already, I mean, I’m going to assume that they know that this outside Kingdom has already dubbed them human sacrifice, slavery, right? They already have a bad PR rap, of course they’re going to be like, “Here you go! Free stuff for you!”
(laughter)
Jessica: It’s the vendor who buys you dinner. Right? It’s not, I would say, it’s very biased that they…
Kolby: So, you think they’re being shown the best parts of the community?
Jessica: Absolutely.
Kolby: I didn’t take it that way at all.
Jeremy: I think somebody even brings that up.
Kolby: The warrior does. The warrior totally is suspect of all of their motivations. The emissary guy is like, “No, no, let’s just be cool.”
Jessica: “Yeah, let’s just be cool, I dig it here.”
Kolby: “Be cool honey.”
(laughter)
Kolby: So, one of the things that I really loved about this was, I was struck with the question of why would you be a drull? Why wouldn’t you try, if you know it’s coming, and it doesn’t sound like there’s a limited number of slots or whatever. Why would you choose that? And then it occurred to me, everyone, everyone around me in society chooses that every day. Every person who gets up and goes to work and comes home and watches TV and like…
Jeremy: It’s a cumulation of all those things, it’s how you’re raised, it’s all of your decisions compound on previous decisions.
Kolby: I thought one of the really great things about this story is that it created a more in your face example of the thing that people in a real life do every day. Like, I feel like there’s a lot of drulls walking among us. People who’s like, the biggest thing they’re waiting for is to pay off their mortgage.
Jeremy: Or not even that. Just making next weeks rent.
Kolby: Right. And it’s just complete lake of belief that you can craft yourself or your society around you to your hopes.
Jessica: So, I totally disagree.
Kolby: Good. That makes better discussions.
Jessica: So, I got from the discussion questions at the end that you would go this way.
Kolby: Right, because I write the discussion questions.
Jessica: Yes. You write the discussion questions at the end. So, I think it is a reflection of society, but I think it’s this wonderful reflection of society of how…
Kolby: Oh, I know where you’re going. How we judge people’s value?
Jessica: Who gets to pick what’s worthy? Women’s work is never worthy. Never. It’s something that we never consider to be part of, do you work or do you stay at home? Right? Guess what, staying at home is fricken work! It’s not, especially if you have kids. It’s very very ablest, “Oh, you’re able to work, you’re worthy is determined by your productivity and success based on the productivity and success that I want based as the judger.”
Kolby: I’m judging you based on my values of what I think has value.
Jessica: Absolutely.
Kolby: I have a counter point for this.
Jessica: Sure.
Kolby: I would agree with everything you just said, except what the drulls are doing.
Jessica: Okay, tell me…
Kolby: Because before you’re totally return to stone, I took their repeat action as the thing that they mistakenly thought mattered that they couldn’t let go of. Whether that’s gardening or prayer or whatever, the thing where they’re like, “No, no, no I have to keep the floor mopped because that has value.” So, you sort of solidify into that value-less action until you truly are gone.
Jessica: So, here’s my disagreement on that. If I knew, if I grew up here, sorry Jeremy we are not letting you talk.
Jeremy: That is fine.
Jessica: If I grew up in this society and I knew that the society would not determine what I am doing as adding value. Perhaps I’m a woman and they don’t think that women’s work is valuable. Or perhaps I do something, I’m a writer and they think art sucks, so I have a choice because I know there is a slim…
Kolby: So closer to the community we see you writing over and over and over again because you’ve been pushed out because they don’t value writers.
Jessica: They don’t value writers, or they don’t value artists, they don’t whatever. I get a choice at some point…
Kolby: I think you’re about to change my mind.
Jessica: … at either get to try to have a slim hope of redemption so my drall action will be, whatever, maybe will redeem me, because they do. That’s the thing about the story, they maybe pick somebody to redeem. The woman that show’s them around…
Jeremy: Has been redeemed.
Jessica: Has been an advocate of redemption. I either do an action that they maybe they’ll find redemptive. I’ll do gardening, I’ll hold up the bridge, I’ll hold up the aquaduct that collapsed, which happens in the story, or I do what will make me happy because that’s what I’m going to do until the end of time because the chance of redemption is so slim.
Kolby: I think that’s why the story is so interesting is I think that is the choice that the cleric makes.
Jessica: Right. She does what she loves.
Kolby: The cleric says, “Look, I understand that you don’t think what I’m doing has value but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t have value. So, I know I’m not going to heal fast enough to get out of here and I know that I’m not going to change the core of who I am to impose, to take on your value system, so I’m willing to sort of die with my value system….
Jessica: …doing what I love.
Kolby: Doing what I love, knowing that you don’t value it.” And in that sense the cleric is an admirable character.
Jessica: I think the drull are admirable. It just depends…
Kolby: On why they’re drull.
Jessica: Well, and …
Kolby: If there’s just a guy playing Playstation eating Cheetos.
(laugher)
Jessica: That’s doing what he loves. It’s his life to choose that.
Kolby: Why can you force me to not eat Cheetos and play PS4?
Jessica: And what I will say is this idea that this worthiness on the backs of others is the part that kills me.
Kolby: That’s what I think creates a great moral ambiguity in the story thought right?
Jessica: I don’t find it. I think it’s immoral. I don’t think there’s any ambiguity.
Kolby: They think they’re essentially feeding on the dead, but of course to the dead they don’t think that.
Jeremy: And what about the class structure that is creating the values that they’re judging on in terms of they need drull to get additional skills so wouldn’t you gain the system to create more drull so that you have…
Jessica: Absolutely.
Kolby: You got more to feed on.
Jessica: There can never be this society without the drull. They can never be this American society without the people who pick up garbage, with the people who work on Amazon, they’re drull life, making it week-to-week paying their rent, we can’t have this society without…
Kolby: Unless we feed off of them.
Jessica: So, we feed off of them. I think this is a great mirror of what society is.
Kolby: Wow, you might have changed my mind actually.
Jessica: I love that.
Kolby: No, I’m totally fine to have my mind change, that’s why I want to have these conversations.
Jessica: Just not with me.
(laughter)
Kolby: No, I mean, you’re wrong but you changed my mind. I’m perfectly allowed to hold 2 contradictor things of you simultaneously.
Jessica: Absolutely.
Kolby: Jeremy, what was your take on the choices that each of the three characters made? Were you respectful of all 3 or did you stack them in order of preference?
Jeremy: No, I think it’s presented very well that they make the choices that are suitable to them.
Kolby: Suitable to their trait so to speak.
Jeremy: To their traits. So, the cleric absolutely makes the choice not to do this because it’s morally offensive to her to do this and that she has such faith in her religion, presumably.
Kolby: And sees value in it even if it is valueless to others.
Jeremy: Exactly. And the other two, yeah perfectly, it makes sense they would make these decisions.
Kolby: What about the fact… so, Jessica has a problem with the society and that they sort of feed and level up on others, but on some level the emissary, I don’t know why I keep calling him that but that’s what I’m going to call him…
Jeremy: Yeah, he’s the emissary.
Kolby: He’s been chosen to do the thing that Jessica has a problem with, but you don’t have a problem with his doing it?
Jeremy: Well, I think it makes sense to him. And they’re gaming him so they he writes this letter.
Kolby: A lot of moral relativism going on.
Jeremy: Absolutely. It doesn’t mean he’s right or wrong.
Kolby: It just means he’s different.
Jeremy: It’s the right decision for him.
Jessica: So, one of the things that I thought about at the end of the story, because I do have problems with this society, but we’ve all met me, I’m not the cleric, right?
(laughter)
Kolby: Didn’t you just in the last episode say, “Your husband had a 70% chance of living, so I abandoned him?”
(laughter)
Jessica: Yep!
(laughter)
Kolby: Maybe we don’t let your daughter listen to that episode.
Jessica: Let’s not let her listen to that.
Jeremy: But Alex, it’s okay?
Jessica: Alex, I’m so sorry again. You know I love you.
Kolby: We know you would’ve swum out for your daughter.
Jessica: I would absolutely swim out for my daughter. But, so, we know I’m not the cleric, I’m not going to self-sacrifice and I’m not going to write and not live.
Kolby: Which one of these three characters are you?
Jessica: I’m not any of these characters. But the questions is, if I’m in this party and they offer you the seal and you know the choice is really I either become a stone statue doing what I love, or I get the seal and have a chance of escaping this place and warning other people.
Kolby: Come back with the nukes.
Jessica: What do you do? Do you get the seal knowing that somebody dies on behalf of you but then the hope is that you would save more people? And the shifting sands, the chance of findings those people again is very hard.
Kolby: I didn’t even, until you brought it up, I didn’t take the drull as being alive. In my mind it wasn’t feeding off the living, it was feeding off the dead. Because in my own bias, I think which you’ve slowly changed my mind on, I feel like it’s okay to feed off the dead because they’ve already chosen to die.
Jessica: Well, and that society has set up that. Everybody in that society believes that. You can’t live day to day believing… I mean, we believe that every day. We believe that people that clean you houses make that choice, we believe that the people that can’t find jobs makes that choice.
Jeremy: It’s another good metaphor more A-type people who look down on anybody else below them who aren’t like absolute achievers. Why would you not be the best person you could absolutely be every day?
Kolby: It’s like, “Maybe I just want to be happy? And this makes me happy.” I struggle with those people, I can’t lie.
Jessica: I’m a definitely a Type- A person, we all know me, but my therapist was very much like, “You keep climbing a career ladder, do you want to keep climbing?” I was like, “Oh, I don’t know, I haven’t thought about that. I’m just looking for the next...”
Jeremy: This is what you do.
Kolby: I just saw a mountain and I climb mountains.
Jessica: Right, that’s exactly it. So it is, that is very much people look down. Kolby and I had this conversation where we always want to make people’s businesses as efficient as possible. We want to make restaurants work better. What if we don’t care? What if we just let people live their lives and they don’t want the most efficient restaurant and want just like this experience?
Kolby: It reminds me of the story…
Jeremy: It works well enough.
Kolby: I’m happy. Like, why do… am I going to be happier if I have more business?
Jeremy: If I’m making 10% more money?
Jessica: And making enough money to do what I love and what I love is sitting playing PlayStation on the couch.
Kolby: Yeah, and I get that you judge me, but I’m happy.
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: It reminds me years ago when I was working at a job that was a little bit of a drull job, I just admit…
Jessica: A drull job or a droll job?
(laughter)
Kolby: I think that’s part of the reason why the name is chosen too. Is I was talking to a co-worker about, “I need to do more with my life”. And he’s said, “You know, you remind me of the guy who went to the Amazon and saw the guys hanging out on the side playing soccer and pulling fish out of the water once in a while to eat. And he goes, ‘No, no, no, you’re doing it all wrong. You need to set up nets and you need a factory, and you need to process it, you need to sell it, and you need to have higher margins and you need to get into a global market’ And the guys said, ‘Why?’ He’s like, ‘So you can sit on the side of the river and play soccer with your friends all day and fish’. And they’re like, ‘Yeah’”.
Jessica: Yeah
Kolby: Yeah.
Jessica: That’s a great…
Kolby: It’s a great story, right? And I feel like that’s the case, where it’s like you chase this thing. I’ll tell you one thing I’m glad the story left out, but I definitely thought about it, is it kind of made it clear that if you were 13 or 14 and started to enter puberty and you got a problem with this, I don’t know why you would have a problem with it because you grew up in a culture and you wouldn’t know any better, the shifting sand and all the trauma would make it almost impossible to escape. There is no ability for somebody born into the community to opt out of the community.
Jessica: And it’s impossible for those 3 people.
Kolby: You can’t leave home a lot in this case.
Jessica: These 3 people can’t escape. Do you either turn into a drull..
Jeremy: … or you accept the…
Jessica: … or you accept the emblem and then leave? And it’s interesting, I think that this letter comes back and it’s like, “No, no, no, they don’t do human sacrifice”; they absolutely do.
Kolby: I did not think they did until you sort of talked about it. Now I get it better.
Jessica: And so, you didn’t answer my question, do you get the seal and try to warn people, or do you not take the seal because you know you’re taking somebody’s life?
Kolby: I totally get the seal.
Jessica: Seal.
Jeremy: Yeah, definitely
Kolby: I understand that you think your life has value. I don’t think your life has value.
Jessica: Oh my god.
Kolby: And therefore, if I’m being honest, I would like to be less horrible, but I’m not. I look at someone like Elon Musk and I think he’s worth more.
Jessica: Oh, I definitely don’t. The guys a jerk.
Kolby: But here’s the thing, I don’t care that he’s a jerk, I care that he’s pushing us as a world slightly, just a hair beyond where we were yesterday.
Jessica: Okay, but for the record, Elon Musk is one of the drull. I am sacrificing that dude to get the seal Just telling you. Even though there’s a chance of redemption for him, and he could go change the world, I’m first.
Kolby: I feel like 99% of society lives off the sort of invention of 1%. And I would put you in that 1%...
Jessica: Aww, that’s so sweet.
Jeremy: But he’s gaming the system so you write a good letter.
Kolby: But a lot of people will never even have the smallest bit of adding to whether it’s cellphones or space exploration or understand of psychology or medicine. They really, you know, do data entry for a living. And I’m just like, I want to be a better human being…. This was one of our conversations like 5 episodes ago, I want to be more empathetic to that person, but I’m perfectly fine being like, “Yeah, no, you’re food.”
Jeremy: But we need people to do data entry. We need a lot of people to do that job.
Jessica: And I think it’s one of those things, I don’t care about the data entry or the invention part. For me it’s the skew of you think the furthering of humanity…
Kolby: You’re overlaying your values on someone else’s choices.
Jessica: … is the goal, and I think the experience of life is the goal.
Kolby: Right. And that’s just a different in perspective that the society is now overlaid on people making this choice. I look at Switzerland and I’m like, “Yea, 300 years of peace and prosperity and you gave us the cuckoo clock.”
(laughter)
Kolby: I don’t think that’s impressive.
Jessica: Don’t they also do really good chocolate?
Kolby: Yeah, they do. And they do really good…
Jessica: Neutrality?
Kolby: Neutrality. They do…
Jeremy: Ehhh, that’s questionable.
Jessica: That’s true.
Kolby: Unethical banking.
Jessica: They do a lot of unethical banking. And I think it’s one of those things, just to be totally clear…
Kolby: But that’s my overlay of values on society.
Jessica: And I will say, I think, I’m a humanist, I think society, I think humans, we’re all very amazing people, but at the end of the day, I do think it’s so big and it’s really about the experience. For me, it’s a lot of the Carl Sagan of the living in that moment and being part of it.
Jeremy: Absolutely.
Kolby: I’m going to call a hair bit of bullshit on this.
Jessica: Oh, tell me.
Kolby: You just said earlier, “I see a mountain and I have to climb it”
Jessica: Yes.
Kolby: So what you’re saying is, is you understand that you overlay your values on your choices in ways it overemphasizes the value of achievement and sort of ticking boxes and goal-setting and moving the ball forward, and yet you’re also saying, but what I really want to do is fish by the river?
Jessica: So, society devalues women’s work, women also devalue women’s work. So, I have been raised in a society where success is… so of course I’m a box checker, of course I love that sense of achievement.
Kolby: I feel like both sides of the scale are sitting one each side of me here.
Jeremy: Yeah, pretty much.
Kolby: Like, Jeremy I feel like you in some ways you are the guys, and I don’t mean this as an insult, I don’t mean this as an insult at all, but I feel like you want to be a good father, you want to be a good friend, you want to be a good…
Jeremy: …fish by the river.
Kolby: … fish by the river kind of guy. And that, and you’re genuinely happy and it generally makes you feel good and Jessica being, kind of the other end of the spectrum. And I definitely understand your point, there is a place for both of those kinds of people.
Jessica: Yes, sure.
Jeremy: Thanks.
(laughter)
Kolby: Good news…
Jessica: Good news.
Kolby: Today we don’t eat you.
Jessica: We don’t eat you today. Just so you know, Kolby is counting down the days if you get a little ashy.
Kolby: If I’m peckish, it’s going to be bad for you. Well, we ran a little bit long on this one, not surprisingly because it was amazing. If you write something, if you’re going to submit something, you should read this story.
Jessica: Yeah. “Rainbow People of the Glittering Glade”, which is on Afterdinnerconversation.com.
Kolby: It is. And also, on Amazon.
Jeremy: And everywhere you get podcasts.
Kolby: And just so that people know that this is the kind of thing we’re looking for; I think I’ll actually link this to the submission page.
Jessica: I think that’d be great.
Kolby: So that they can be like, “Oh, let me read a sample of the kind of thing you’re looking for.” Maybe shorter, if longer is struggling for you, Jeremy doesn’t like to stay up late reading.
Jeremy: No, it just was a busy day yesterday.
Kolby: I think this is exactly what the website was created for and I was very happy to get it. So, thank you person’s who’s name I don’t remember.
Jessica: With our author let’s give him some credit.
Kolby: Seriously, he’s a rockstar.
Jeremy: David Shultz.
Kolby: David Shults, who by the way, I think this is amazing has degrees in cognitive science, philosophy, law, and education because why not?
Jessica: That guy? Checking boxes.
Kolby: He’s checking boxes. Which is ironic that he writes his story then.
Jessica: Well, maybe because he’s like me and learned.
Kolby: Maybe, he learned-ed it.
Jessica: Kolby.
Kolby: I’m sorry. You are listening to After Dinner Conversation short stories for long conversations. You’ve been joined by myself, and Jessica and Jeremy. And we had a great time talking about “Rainbow People of the Glittering Glade”. If you had a good time listening to us, please “like” or “subscribe.” Please come to La Gattara, get a cat, they are available for adoption, you can come pay $10 and just hang out with them if you’re in Tempe, Arizona. Additionally, go to Amazon and you can download any of the books, this one plus probably 15 or 20-30 other ones. I don’t know, there’s a lot of them now. Candidly not all of them are as good as this one, but many of them are very, very good and they certainly will encourage you to have really good conversations with your friends or with your kids, if you want to have a literally conversation with your family, gasp- who does that? About things that matter outside of like, Game of Thrones.
Jessica: Also, good ethical and moral dilemmas.
Jeremy: That’s a good thing to talk about too.
Kolby: There are actually. I drink and I know things.
Jessica: I drink and I know things.
Kolby: Okay. Thank you. Bye.
E10. "The Alpha-Dye Shirt Factory" - Is suicide ever the rational choice?
STORY SUMMARY: The story is told in the 1st person by a woman in the late 1800’s working in an inner city garment factory. She comes out of the bathroom to see a fire has started. Women try and escape down the elevator shaft as smoke fills the room. She heads for the fire escape, but it collapses, killing everyone on it. Finally, she decides the best thing to do to prevent being burned to death it to jump to her death.
DISCUSSION: The story is a historical fiction version of the Triangle Shirt factory fire. The story isn’t really about the fire though, it’s about suicide. Is it okay to kill yourself when you are being burned alive? What if that burning alive is depression, or recovering from some disease or injury that is very painful? It feels like it will never end and it feels like killing yourself is the lessor pain. Nobody jumps out of a burning building because they think they are going to live, they jump because it’s better than being burned alive. How long are you required to suffer before you can stop your suffering? Are you required to never quit?
BOOK LINK: Download the accompanying short story here.
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SUPPORT: Support us on Patreon.
“Is suicide ever the rational choice?”
Kolby, Jeremy, and Jessica discuss the ethics in the historical short story, “The Alpha-Dye Shirt Factory” by Tyler W. Kurt.
Transcript (By: Transcriptions Fast)
The Alpha-Dye Shirt Factory
Kolby: Hi. Welcome to After Dinner Conversation, short stories for long discussions. You are listening to myself, Kolby, as well as…
Jeremy: Jeremy.
Jessica: And Jessica.
Kolby: We are doing what we do every week, we’re doing podcasts about stories from the website Afterdinnerconversation.com. You can download these stories on Amazon, you can listen to our podcast wherever Amazon is played, as well as YouTube so you can watch it, maybe you’re watching right now. And if you’re enjoying this, please “like” or “subscribe”. It allows us to continue doing what we love. We have a heck of a good time, as you can probably tell if you’ve listened to other episodes, doing these. And the whole point of this is to encourage sort of intelligent adult conversation, adult-ish conversation about interesting ethical topics. And if you’ve got a story you’d like to submit and you think “oh, that was great”, just go to our website afterdinnerconversation.com and submit it. One of us will read it, probably me, and assuming that we like it, it’ll get published and maybe we’ll be discussing it because that’s all the stuff that we get is stuff that people have sent us that we like and we’re like, “oh yeah, we can totally talk about that”, and talk about the Hobson’s choice of it as it was last week. We are once again, for the tenth time now, this is our 10th episode, in La Gattara. I have finally learned how to say it by the 10th episode. Where they have cats that are available…
Jeremy: …for adoption.
Kolby: …for adoption. So, if you hear screeching in the background, that is probably the cats letting us know that they are having a good time. Having a little cat party. If you don’t want to adopt a cat, but you just want to come visit cats because you like having stuff on countertops at home, you can just pay $10 and come sit with the cats. It reminds me of the joke where the cat walks into the bar, and the cat says “I’ve had a really bad day, can I have a drink?” And the bartender put its it up there, and the cat goes...
(Kolby knocks water bottle off the table)
(laughter)
Kolby: “Pour me another.” And just knocks it off the countertop. I think that a great cat joke.
Jessica: That was a good cat joke.
Kolby: There are very few solid cat jokes.
Jessica: It was purrrfect.
(laughter)
Kolby: Purrrrfect, yeah. So, the story we’re talking about today…
Jeremy: Please stop.
Kolby: You’re not a dad, you don’t get to tell dad jokes.
Jessica: Oh, darn it.
Kolby: … is“Alpha-Dye Shirt Factory” by Tyler Kurt. Jessica drew the short straw so she gets to do the honors. For obviously, ideally you should have read the story beforehand but we know not everyone does, so Jessica is going to get you up to speed.
Jessica: I will say, you should read this story beforehand, but you don’t have too. I feel like our ethical and moral discussions tend to be so broad that you don’t need to read the story to listen, but I would recommend that people go and listen.
Kolby: I will be the first to say I’ve listened to “Car Talk” for years and not once have I worked on a car.
(laughter)
Jessica: I mean, point. Point. Alright. So “The Alpha-Dye Shirt Factory”, the narrator is Mary, and she works at the Alpha-Dye shift factory as a seamstress. The story opens where she is working and her friend Maria asked her to come into the bathroom and there’s this whole backstory about the rules of working in the factory and how many minutes they get for a bathroom break and how you can time it so you can talk to somebody. And as somebody who worked at a call-center once, very similar roles.
(laugher)
Jeremy: Absolutely.
Jessica: And Maria tells Mary that she’s engaged. And it’s against the rules to be engaged at the shift factory which is again, not the call center rules, but you know.
Kolby: This is probably earlier than you were at the call center.
Jessica: Probably. Let’s not date me.
(laughter)
Jessica: And so, Maria tells her that she got engaged and Mary is very happy for her and then they smell smoke. And that is really kind of the setup.
Kolby: When they come out of the bathroom, I think it is?
Jeremy: They hear commotion, they come out of the bathroom.
Jessica: Yeah. And the smoke is coming up from the…
Jeremy: … first floor, they are on the second floor.
Jessica: … the first floor. Yeah. The first floor is clearly on fire and the smoke is coming up through the floor boards. She mentions the fire escape and the fire escape being just rusty and people start pouring out into the fire escape. The fire escape collapses and…
Kolby: She watches the people on the fire escape fall to their death.
Jessica: Yeah. And then the floor falls out. So….
Kolby: It’s a wooden floor, I think?
Jeremy: Yeah.
Kolby: Like, old-timey.
Jessica: Yep. And so, old-timey, I have a wooden floor.
Kolby: But you’re not in a 6-story building with wooden floors.
Jessica: This is true.
Kolby: Maybe they do, I have no idea.
Jessica: And so, the floor falls out and then she spends the rest of the story trying to determine first, if she’s going to try to escape and then knowing she’s not going to escape and trying to decide if she would rather be burnt alive or, first she tries to do smoke inhalation, she tries to kill herself by falling asleep because of smoke inhalation. Her body rejects that, she’s coughing, and then she tries to go to the window and she decides to throw herself out the window.
Jeremy: Apparently, not on the second story, they are much higher in the building.
Jessica: Yeah, sorry.
Kolby: 7th-story. She’s on the 7th-story. So, probably fatal.
Jessica: Yea, so probably fatal although she is the narrator, I will say, we don’t get anything that says that she’s not. She seems to be telling the story because she says, “My name is Mary.” This is not…
Kolby: Oh, that’s a good point.
Jessica: So, we don’t really know the fate of her except that she chooses to jump out the window because she’d rather die from falling then from…
Jeremy: …being burnt alive.
Jessica: …being burnt alive. And that is our…
Kolby: Another cheery story.
Jessica: Another cheery story.
Kolby: Thurman last week was a cheery story. We need a story about just like two cats walk into a bar.
(laughter)
Jesica: I don’t think there’s a lot of ethical/moral complications with that but, we can maybe….
Kolby: It is if you’re a dog bartender.
Jessica: If you are a writer out there and you would like to write a dog bartender…
Jeremy: …Cat dilemma story.
Jessica: …cat dilemma story.
Kolby: I can’t serve those cats, against my ethics.
Jessica: Alright. So, let’s start out our conversation. Kolby, what’d you think?
Kolby: So, uh, so first off I think it’s a direct mirror of, um, what’s it called, the Triangle Shirt Factory, the Triangle Shirtwaist Coast Factories, so I assume it took place late 1800s early 1900s, certainly before there were a ton of OSHA regulations. And so, this story is roughly true in that there was a shirt factory that caught on fire and…
Jessica: There are still shirt factories.
Kolby: Yeah, well, not in America, but yes. And because there were no regulations many of the people died. Many of them jumped out of windows. Many of them jumped down the elevator shaft. You know. It’s a horrible… I guess that good part that came out of that is because it was such headline news, we got a lot of our safety regulations for high-rises and stuff out of it so that it would be harder to happen in the future. What did I think of it? Honestly, it struck… I’m reading it and I’m thinking, “it’s a story, it’s a story, oh, you know, it’s a sad story” and then I got to the questions, and it started talking about, I think, suicide or depression or all those sort of things, and then I was like, “oh, it’s not a story about a fire in a factory. It’s a story about the choices that you make that are logical choices internally but could be illogical choices to somebody looking externally.”
Jessica: Mmmm. Give me an example.
Kolby: So, and this is just my own personal opinion but I guess everything that is personal is your personal opinion, but I think there is an assumption that people that commit suicide are taking a coward’s way out or they are somehow being selfish or disrespectful or whatever. And I think, having been a person who went through years of depression, I think it’s easy to say as an outsider looking it, it’s harder when you’re in that situation and you feel like this is as good as it gets and it will never get good again. And so, it is a little bit like the situation of, “Do I just want to burn alive forever or do I want to end the burning?” And in that sense, I think, I’m not condoning suicide of course, but I think it becomes a rational choice to that person based on their perspective. And so, I think, to belittle that choice by saying that it is cowardly or cheap or you’re a quitter or whatever, I think is disrespectful to that choice. I certainly think that suicide is not a great idea and I certainly think that your choice it’s selfish in that the people who love you will miss you, and you’re choosing to end your own pain at the cost of others people’s pain. Like, I want to end my pain and therefor I’m going to put pain on my mom or my dad or my friends or my kids or whoever loves me because my pain is more important than the pain I’m going to cause them.
Jeremy: Right, I can see that.
Kolby: But I do understand how a person who feels like nobody would miss them or that nobody would be sad about their loss, would see it as a rational choice. Yeah. I mean, I’ll give you an example that came up and then I’ll shut up so we can talk about other and you guys can chime in. In like, 85- or 90-years old Kurt Vonnegut committed suicide. He’d been depressed his whole life, he was just clinically depressed, and it shows up in his writing. And I remember when I first heard I was really crushed by this because he’s a writer I really admire and I was like, “You understand, even if you just wrote doodles on napkins, you would be adding to the sum of humanity, because you are that amazing.” But then, I have to remind myself, “He’s stuck it out for 85 years or 90 years or however old he was, he gave us 15 books that are all astounding. I guess you’re allowed to be done.” And Gordon Ramsay I think committed suicide?
Jessica: No, no, no. Not Gordon Ramsey. Anthony Bourdain. Geez louise.
Kolby: I mean, you hear about famous people that have committed suicide and you’re like, “You have everything.”
Jeremy: Robin Williams.
Kolby: Robin Williams is a great example, right? And I think, it’s easy to be angry until you have been in that situation.
Jessica: And I think it’s easy to be…. I think… I think things mitigate people taking their own life. Right? So, a lot of times, as a society, right? So, if somebody has been diagnosed with Parkinson’s, which is what I believe Robin Williams was diagnosed with when he decided to take his own life, when somebody has been diagnosed with a terminal disease, we are much more accepting as a society of something that…
Jeremy: Again, this is a way out of that pain.
Jessica: Right, this is a way out of that pain. And we… that is a logical step for society.
Kolby: Although sometimes in a legal step, to have doctor assisted suicide. Or commit suicide is illegal although I don’t know how you ticket the person afterwards their dead or whatever.
Jessica: Right. But I think we as a society are okay with that but if it’s depression, if it’s a mental illness, we have a lot harder time with that because, A) as a society we do a terrible job of admitting that mental illness is an…
Jeremy: An illness.
Kolby: You want to be like, “just try harder.”
Jessica: Right. Like, “Go outside.” And we have a hard time with the idea that, we want to fix that because it is a mental illness. We think that medicine can be in charge of fixing…
Kolby: A broken bone or whatever…
Jessica: Or a disease, and if they fail, we’re okay, that legitimizes that person taking their own life but with a mental illness, we don’t think that it’s something that necessarily medicine can solve because it not always is, it’s not something can be solved.
Kolby: It’s much more complicated problem.
Jeremy: And as a society we think that it is something you can pull yourself out of.
Jessica: You can pull yourself out of, you’re not trying hard enough, or sometimes I think society does take the blame in like, “Yes it’s bad and we should try harder to save you.” Which I think is something that I don’t necessarily think is … there is definitely cause and effect of, you know, ostracizing people or making depression something that is ostracizable. But I don’t think that necessarily, “If we were just nicer to one another, people would not be depressed.” That’s not a thing.
Kolby: Right. And that’s one of my frustrations with, I mean, when I was going through a long bout of depression, one of the things that was frustrating to me is people say, “Well you don’t seem depressed.”
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: And I’m like, “No, you don’t understand that depression isn’t sadness. It’s a totally different thing.” Like, I can be on a jet-ski and be depressed. It’s got nothing to do with if you’re smiling, it’s just this thing that just sits on you. And I don’t know how that… I don’t know…
Jeremy: … how to describe it to somebody who hasn’t experienced it.
Kolby: Yeah, who hasn’t experienced it. And it’s like, “No, I can be happy and be depressed. They are not the same thing.” The people that say, “Well, the last time I saw him he seemed fine.”
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: No, you’re totally missing that point of what depression is, or clinical depression is in that sense, right?
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: Wow, that’s a mood killer.
(laughter)
Kolby: So, one of the things that I thought… one of the questions I thought was interesting for me is what if she had been wrong? Because that goes back to the issue of depression, right? It feels like it’s forever, it feels like you can’t get out of the building, but it’s possible. Two-minutes later is when the fire truck with the longer ladder shows up. And so, do you have a, sort of, obligation to life to take the burn in the hopes that better fire truck shows up, or are you allowed to help yourself?
Jeremy: Again, I think that comes back down to really, the pain that you’re feeling. At some point, in this metaphor, you’re deciding, and I don’t think….
Kolby: When you’ve had enough.
Jeremy: Right, this is as much as you can take, and you know, I don’t think that matters if two minutes later. The fire truck is just late.
Jessica: I think it’s interesting at the end of the story, she talks about when she’s deciding to jump, one of the things she says is “Don’t aim for a body”.
Jeremy: “Don’t try to take anybody down with me.”
Jessica: And I was like, “No, no, aim for a body.” And then it becomes this question, do you…
Kolby: “Aim for the most expensive car I can find. “
(laughter)
Kolby: That’s what I’d do. I’d take out a rich person’s insurance coverage with it.
Jessica: I was like, “Land on something soft, that could be another person.”
Kolby: Right?
(laughter)
Kolby: You look plump.
Jessica: Right, exactly. And so, then it becomes this idea of, do I die and know that death is certain, right? Do I take this way out and know that death is certain, or do I aim for a big old pile of people and hope that I’m just…
Jeremy: That it breaks my fall.
Jessica: …I’m thoroughly maimed but recoverable. And so, then it’s, “I can either have an agonizing maybe death, or agonizing and then recovery and then living with those injuries.” Which is a very interesting, when we’re paralleling it to something like a terminal illness or depression… do I end it now and know that it’s over, or do I continue to suffer and hope that either I get better or I also die, and it’s the same outcome, it’s just….
Kolby: But I died fighting, I died fighting in pain.
Jeremy: Or do I go through all this chemotherapy and radiation treatment?
Kolby: That was one of my mom’s decision, when she was diagnosed, she was diagnosed with breast cancer and bone cancer at the same time, and she was like “I don’t want chemo. I was a nurse for 35 years, I know chemo does to people, I know that I’m 70 years old, I don’t want to spend a couple of miserable years to get 5 more, and I’m a two-pack a day smoker.”
Jeremy: Huge lifestyle change.
Kolby: Yea, she was never going to quit smoking. So, she decided, “I’m good. Like, I’m good” and maybe if she was 40 I’d be more upset with her, but I guess at 70 I’m less upset. I don’t know. One of the true things that came out, because I researched this…
(laguther)
Jessica: What? That is Jeremy’s role.
Kolby: I’m sorry.
Jessica: He’s the researcher.
Kolby: I’ve been researching. One of the things that, there are a couple of people who survived on the top floors of the shift factory fire and it’s interesting the way some of them, in the sense that they tried. They simply tried. One of the women slid down “Matrix” style, slid down the wire in the elevator shaft until she burned all of the skin to the bones of her hands and she had to let go, and then she dropped the last 3 or 4 stories. But so many people had fallen down the elevator shaft first, that the pile of bodies, she’d landed on the pile of bodies, she knocked herself unconscious, when they later were pulling all the bodies out, she was…
Jeremy: … she was still alive.
Kolby: She was lined up with the bodies on the sidewalk and woke up and was like, “I’m not dead.” And just had a concussion and burnt hands. And that was the thing. And another woman who jumped out of one of the top stories, she jumped out for the flagpole that hangs out of the 3rd story of the building, and grabbed it and it snapped off and it slid off and snapped off and it slowed her down enough that she broke her legs and lived.
Jessica: Wow.
Kolby: Yeah.
Jessica: That’s incredible.
Jeremy: That’s rough.
Kolby: Yeah. I mean, and those are, I think, in some ways those are the things we make movies of and the heroes we have are the people who have every reason to stop trying and try anyways.
Jeremy: And keep going.
Jessica: Yeah.
Kolby: Because we somehow view that as heroic.
Jessica: We definitely view that has heroic. And to some point it is heroic. That’s a lot of tenacity.
Jeremy: No chance, but no choice.
Kolby: Right.
Jessica: Right. And…
Jeremy: I imagine you hear that a lot from military veterans too who get awards.
Jeremy: Yeah, definitely.
Kolby: They were like, “No, they were shooting at me, I shot back, it just so happens, like, you know, this was the best of a bad situation.”
Jeremy: Right.
Jessica: Yeah. I think absolutely that’s true. I think it’s interesting if you read any holocaust survivor stories, like the amount…
Kolby: We were just talking about “Night” a couple of days ago.
Jessica: Oh yea?
Kolby: Jeremy and I were.
Jessica: I love that book.
Kolby: I think it should be mandatory reading. But in that book and a lot of the holocaust stories, the will to live somehow exceeds the bodies will to live, right? The people who lived and died, it was almost this mental desire to not die at the level of starvation and exhaustion.
Jessica: Well, I will also say that the people that died also had that same mental…
Kolby: Oh, sure, sure.
Jessica: It just didn’t work.
Kolby: It just didn’t work for them, that’s very possible.
Jessica: And I think a lot of people...
Kolby: People got sent to the long marches and things.
Jessica: Yea. I think a lot of it is chance. I think a lot of it, this person had “X” percent more body fat when they arrived and therefor, they could survive.
Jeremy: Slightly better conditions.
Kolby: Had better shoes and whatever.
Jessica: Exactly. But, like, the mental tenacity it takes to get through a situation like that, like every time I ready a survivor story, I’m just like, “And here’s the part where I die.”
(laughter)
Kolby: Right?
Jessica: Because I’m exhausted reading it, I can’t imagine….
Jeremy: … having to live through something like that.
Jessica: No.
Kolby: This is the part where I’m like, “I’m good, like, I’m good.”
Jessica: And then, for a lot of Holocaust survivors or survivors of lots of situations, there’s that survivor’s guilt, right? The chance, whatever the chance was, the shoes, the, you know, the extra body fat or whatever it was that allowed them to survive, was not because they were a better person. There wasn’t a worthiness about…
Kolby: They were just standing at the right place at the right time.
Jessica: Exactly. And so, it then it becomes “it was just chance...”
Jeremy: It was just luck.
Jessica: “…It was a chance that I survived and now I feel terrible that that chance was me.”
Kolby: So, do you feel like a person who either has a terminal illness or is clinically depressed, do you think they have an obligation to pursue that chance?
Jessica: No. Absolutely not.
Kolby: You’re willing to give people a pass on being a quitter?
Jessica: Absolutely going to give people a pass.
Jeremy: Because it’s their choice. Again, do you want to go through the chemotherapy, do you want to go through the potential pain for the potential good outcome? And some people just don’t want to make that choice.
Kolby: So my sister and I have a running, it’s a joke but it’s not a joke, in that someday one of us is going to go with the other one to the hospital, to the doctor, and the doctor is going to be like, “I’ve got some news and you got whatever whatever, you’ve got 3 weeks to live”, whatever the case may be, and we have an understanding that what’s going to happen is this: We’re going to walk about of the room, and my sister’s going to say, “So what did the doctor say?” And I’m going to tell her, “He said you’re going to be fine.” And then, she’s like, “Oh good.” “It’s just a heart palpitation, you just need to drink less Pepsi.” And then as we pass the dumpster, baseball bat to the back of the head.
(laughter)
Kolby: Throw her in the dumpster. So that her last thought is…
Jeremy: …she’s going to be fine.
Kolby: “It’s fine. It’s going to be fine.” Like, you don’t need those 3 weeks or worrying about it. And by the way, just to be clear, she has a standing order for me as well.
(laughter)
Kolby: But I’ve also made clear to her like, pneumonia does not count.
(laughter)
Jeremy: So, here’s the list.
Kolby: Shingles, I’m probably… it needs to be like.
Jeremy: So, you have to clarify it for her.
Jessica: I mean, like, there’s so many reasons to hit Kolby with a baseball bat.
(laughter)
Kolby: But we’ve had that discussion.
Jessica: “I have a freckle that’s discolored” Oh, Kolby gets a baseball bat.
(laughter)
Kolby: “You’re going to be fine. Let’s walk past this dumpster.” Yeah, but we’ve had that discussion.
Jeremy: “I’m going to take you out to this cornfield”
Kolby: Right. But we’ve had that discussion of like, “Look, if I waiver in the last weeks, don’t let me waiver because I don’t want to be that kind of burden on other people. I don’t want to have you have that memory of me, all those sorts of things.”
Jessica: So, my mom is a hospice nurse and so…
Kolby: Man, she is like an angel.
Jeremy: She is.
Jessica: I mean, an angel, she is the best mom in the world too. But she is very much of the, “I don’t want to linger, she’s a DNR, if there’s something that bad, I don’t want tube feedings, anything like that.” We’re very clear on all of those instructions, Mom.
(laughter)
Jessica: However, I am the opposite, right? I absolutely want to linger. I want to linger and linger… I want people to curse my lingering as long as I am…
Kolby: You want somebody to be sponge bathing you for weeks before you go.
Jessica: Right. But, just to be clear, I have to be conscious and I have to be of right mind. And…
(Kolby gives sideways look)
Jessica: Shut up. I am of right mind now.
(Laughter)
Jessica: Shut up Kolby.
Kolby: That look of mine said it all.
Jessica: Yes, it did.
(Laughter)
Kolby: You read a little too much Dylan Thomas is what I think. You’re all about not going gentle into that good night.
Jessica: I absolutely won’t go gently. Mostly because I probably a big part of it, is just a fear of death. I’m a very existentialist person and so this idea that in my final moments, I’ll say something super profound and it’ll make it all worthwhile or whatever. But I want every single ounce of life. I want every moment to be sucked up. I don’t want to go suddenly. I kind of want to know I’m going to go because I can’t imagine, like the suddenness, it upsets me so much to think, I could walk out the door and get hit by a train and that would be the end and I wouldn’t even know it was coming.
Kolby: And three witches would be hackling over it. Three witches would be hackling over it from like 2 weeks ago.
(laughter)
Jessica: That’s so true.
Jeremy: And yet you lived in front of a train track for years.
Jessica: For years.
(Laughter)
Jessica: For years. Those things don’t derail. I knew it was coming.
Kolby: Jeremy, you’ve been pretty quiet on this one. Do you have thoughts? What would be your opinion on all of this?
Jeremy: You guys kind of said it all.
Jessica: Are we baseball batting you? I just need to know.
Kolby: I need to know.
Jessica: I need to know.
Kolby: I’m actually, I’m going to use one of those little baseball bats.
(laughter)
Kolby: …that you get from the toy store so I have to do it like 9 or 10 times.
(laughter)
Kolby: Like, wack wack.
Jessica: So, you’ll know it’s coming.
Kolby: Yeah, you’ll know it’s coming. No, don’t worry, I’ll use aluminum.
Jessica: Are you a baseball bat or are you a lingerer?
Kolby: Are you a lingerer?
Jeremy: I don’t know. I’ll have to think about that.
Jessica: What do you mean you’ve never thought about that?
Jeremy: I’ve never thought about that.
Kolby: What about if you were the lady in the story? Would you jump?
Jeremy: Oh yeah, definitely jump.
Kolby: You would’ve been a jumper?
Jeremy: Oh yeah. Fire is one of the worst ways to die. Burning in a fire is one of the worst ways to die.
Kolby: I’ve read from fire survivors, people that are like 70-80% burned that they have said years later, even now that I have lived through it, I would still have preferred to have died.
Jessica: Wow.
Kolby: Even now knowing that they’re now going to live a long-fulfilled life.
Jessica: Wow, that’s incredible.
Kolby: Because it’s just a painful way to go. Which also makes me, and I didn’t think about this when I was reading the story, it also makes me think mad props for like the monks during Vietnam War.
Jeremy: Holy crap, right?
Kolby: And the ones who light themselves on fire with gasoline and they just, not a peep.
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: Just right up to the moment they are dead, like man, I don’t have that kind of conviction for anything. I wish I did.
Jessica: Step on a nail and I’m going a screaming banshee.
(laughter)
Jessica: Yeah.
Jeremy: Yeah, definitely jump.
Kolby: We need a cheerier story for next week.
Jeremy: I know, right? What is our story…
Kolby: 2 cats walk into a bar; dog won’t serve them.
(laughter)
Jessica: If you’re that writer, please write about 2 cats that walk into a bar.
Kolby: So, you have been, we still haven’t gotten a copy, a narrative copy of the….
Jeremy: The trolly problem.
Kolby: The trolly problem. It’s coming, thought, I’m sure. You’ve been listening to After Dinner Conversation, short stories for long conversations, with myself Kolby and Jessica and Jeremy. We always have, maybe not this week, but we normally always have a great time discussing our stories and heckling each other. This was a little bit of a sad one but a good one. A worthy discussion. If you’ve got a story you’d like to submit, feel free to email it to After Dinner Conversation. If you enjoyed this conversation in the sense that you found it fulfilling, not in the sense that you found it fun, then “like” and “subscribe”. It means a lot to us. If you’re in the Tempe area, come by La Gattara to adopt a cat or pay a couple of bucks to at least hang out with a cat.
Jessica: They are so cute.
Kolby: See, we didn’t even think about that, that cats would’ve survived.
Jeremy: We need another camera on all the cats.
Jessica: The cats would’ve survived.
Kolby: Cats can survive 7-foot drops because they sprawl out and they become like a cat-a-chute.
(Laughter)
Jeremy: Cat-a-chute?
Kolby: And they’re fine. Yeah. “like” and “subscribe”, submit stuff, download these on Amazon and thank you for joining us again. Next weeks story will be 2 cats walk into a bar. Wait, that’s not it. What will it be Jeremy?
Jeremy: “Rainbow People of the Glittering Glams”.
Kolby: I love this story. I know you thought it was.
Jeremy: It’s a good story. It’s just long.
Kolby: It was just long.
Jessica: I loved it.
Kolby: I feel like it wasn’t long and wasted. It was actually long and like, solid.
Jessica: Yep.
Kolby: Yeah, 3 Kingdon Warfs?
Jeremy: I don’t know what the word is.
Kolby: Warns. There’s no F there. Three kingdom wards, people who protect the kingdom, are sent to investigate the reclusive rainbow people of the shifting desert. And I really, honestly, if you submit a story called “Rainbow People of the Glittering Glade”, you pretty much automatically get published, I think.
Jessica: I was the opposite. I saw the title and was like, “Nope…”
Kolby: So pretentious.
Jessica: “… nope, that’s a big nope from me.” I was wrong guys.
Kolby: You were wrong.
Jessica: It was delightful.
Kolby: Thank you for joining us. We will see you at the next one. Bye.
* * *
E9. "The Truth About Thurman" - Is there a "better" decision, when both cause someone to die?
STORY SUMMARY: The main character heads into the military supervisors office. It seems two soldiers have been captured terrorists who are threatening to kill them both unless the US Government tells them before the deadline which to kill, and which to go free. One is a woman, and the other is gay. They want the government to make a Sophie’s Choice, so to speak. The government decides to do neither and launch a rescue operation that fails. Both are killed. The story ends with the original solider who started the story locking himself in his room and killing himself. It turns out he was in a relationship with the woman and she was pregnant with his child.
DISCUSSION: Story is built around a Hobson’s choice. A choice whereby both option are terrible, and you must pick one, or both will happen. It’s interesting in that it makes us decide how we value different people. If they are both in the military, then make the government should not pick, so as not to encourage terrorists to kidnap others. Being in the military, you should know you may have to die for the country. Otherwise, maybe all people are of equal value. Maybe children are worth more? It is fair that he didn’t tell his superior officer about the pregnancy? This is part of the machismo culture whereby men aren’t allowed to feel things, and talk about how things affect them. In real life, of course, he would immediately have been removed from the situation.
BOOK LINK: Download the accompanying short story here.
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“Is there a better decision, when both cause someone to die?”
Kolby, Jeremy, and Jessica discuss the ethics in the terrorist driven short story, “The Truth About Thurman” by Jenean McBrearty.
Transcription (By: Transcriptions Fast)
The Truth About Thurman
Kolby: Hi, and welcome back again to After Dinner Conversation; short stories for long discussions. I am your co-host Kolby.
Jeremy: I’m your co-host Jeremy.
Jessica: I am a co-host... is there such a thing at three co-hosts?
Kolby: Tri-hosts?
Jessica: I am a side-kick Jessica.
(laughter)
Kolby: And today we are talking about “The Truth About Thurman”...
Jessica: By Jeanean McBrearty.
Kolby: If you haven’t read it yet, you should read it ideally before listening to the podcast. You can get that at amazon.com, you can download it. If you like this podcast, feel free to “like” and “subscribe”. If you’ve got a story you want to submit, go to our website Afterdinnerconversation.com. You can submit stories, we’ll read them, if we love them, then they’ll be one of the ones we discuss someday.
Jessica: Where we at?
Kolby: We are at.... thank you.
Jessica: You’re welcome.
Kolby: We are at La Gattara, where they have cat rental. No, it’s not cat rental, they adopt cats out and they’ve always got loads of cats. We’ve had them... if you hear clicking and clacking in the background it’s not that Jeremy’s a bad sound guy, it’s that...
(laughter)
Jeremy: It could also be that too.
Jessica: It’s also Jeremy.
Kolby: There’s got to be like, what, 25-30 cats in here?
Jessica: There’s... I don’t know if there’s that many.
Jeremy: Maybe 20?
Kolby: There’s like a lot.
Jeremy: High teens.
Kolby: High teens, yeah.
Jessica: And they are adorable. And you can come pay to come and sit and be with them and have them knock your stuff off the table or sit on your laptop, so if you’re missing a cat and you want to come and hang out, you can.
Jeremy: This is a great place.
Kolby: This is our 8th or 9th episode here. It’s really nice of them.
Jeremy: I’m glad you can count.
(laughter)
Kolby: I’m totally loosing count. I don’t know how the people are like, “I’ve done 200 episodes”, I’m like, “How would you even remember that dude?”
Jeremy: Because they write it down.
(laughter)
Jessica: It’s this thing called pen and paper Kolby.
Kolby: I should totally try that. Okay, so for the people that haven’t read “The Truth about Thurman”, Jessica would you, I’m sorry, Jeremy...
Jeremy: Yes.
Kolby: I just gave Jessica a heart attack because she hadn’t prepped the summary. Jeremy has prepped to do the summary.
Jessica: Jeremy does do good summaries.
Kolby: Jeremy, tell us about “The Truth About Thurman” for the people that didn’t read it.
Jeremy: So, as our story opens our protagonist, Captain Thurman, waits to see his commander. When he’s ushered in, they begin discussing the events that lead up to the capture or that led up to the capture of two American soldiers and the ultimatums from the captors. Apparently, the Jihadist captors want the military or the government to pick which soldier will die and which will be released. During these scenes Captain Thurman also displays several odd moments of misogyny, or what’s the other term?
Kolby: Misogyny.
Jeremy: No, anyways, they discuss the characteristics of the two soldiers presumably to find out the potential fallout of watching either of them be murdered by the jihadists. First soldier Whitcomb is gay; the second Chandler is a Jewish woman.
Kolby: Like this is a math problem.
Jeremy: The commander suggest that either way, someone will be offended and bring s up the movie “Sophie’s Choice” saying that no matter who they choose, the Jihadist’s will most likely kill them both. So, and the best thing they can do is ignore the request and work on a rescue. Thurman is unhappy with this response and spend the next 48 hours cleaning and repainting his apartment while watching “Sophie’s Choice” and trying not the think about the torture and violent end the two soldiers will undoubtedly face, as intelligence operators are unable to locate them for a rescue. So, once completed with the remodel of this apartment and the movie, Thurman agrees that his commander is correct: “to be chosen as the insignificant one would be another torturer.”
Kolby: Wow, you pulled that quote right from the story. That’s good.
Jeremy: Yeah. It’s a synopsis.
Kolby: But that’s a direct quote, that’s awesome.
Jeremy: All of this culminated with the reveal that Thurman and Chandler were engaged and he wonders if telling the commander that she was pregnant would have made any difference. The story ends with Thurman shooting himself just as the news reports the videos of the soldiers’ executions have been released.
Kolby: Okay.
Jessica: So, it’s a real light-hearted story. As they all are.
Kolby: Does he paint his entire house black or something, and black over all the mirrors? Velvet?
Jessica: Yeah.
Jeremy: Did he paint it? He was replacing everything with black velvet.
Jessica: I thought he was replaced everything with velvet. Which is covering all the mirrors and stuff is a Jewish tradition when somebody passes away.
Kolby: Jeremy, you have thoughts when you read it?
Jeremy: I mean, the topic they bring up is really good. The idea that to choose; again, “Sophie’s Choice” is a great example to bring into the story.
Kolby: It’s driving me nuts; I can’t remember the name of the term it’s based on. Yeah, I’m going to look it up.
Jeremy: I was thinking toxic masculinity; that was the other term.
Jessica: Toxic masculinity, oh, the commander guy. Yeah, he was kind of...
Jeremy: Well, even Thurman; they’re both a little steeped in that. I feel like the story is pretty well written. You do get the character’s motives and their thoughts in this and it’s an interesting perspective. The question it asked is very hard to answer; how do you choose?
Kolby: Hopsen’s choice.
Jessica: Hopsen’s choice.
Kolby: Yea, if you’re Wikipedia-ing something, Hobson’s choice is the thing you Wikipedia and then “Sophie’s Choice” is the movie that’s roughly based on it. Yeah, sorry, I was going to forget.
Jeremy: No, and don’t they bring it up in “Rick and Morty”, just to choose which of the...
(laughter)
Jessica: I don’t watch it guys.
Kolby: ”Rick and Morty” is good. It’s really good.
Jessica: Whatever.
Kolby: So, I’ll tell you one of the things I really liked about this story is it’s not particularly long, it’s, you know, 5-6 pages. You can read it...
Jeremy: ... in a sitting.
Kolby: ... in not long. And it is kind of a one-trick pony. It’s the what do you do in “Sophie’s Choice” or Hobson’s choice scenario but it doesn’t stretch it out into 35 pages to ask me one questions. Right? And I really appreciated that, that I could be like, “yeah, just give me the...
Jeremy: ...“here’s the scenario”
Kolby: ...”Give me the sketch and give me the choice and let me have something I can decide what I think about it.” And I did appreciate that it was both did something interesting and did it in a brief way, so I didn’t feel like, ya know, I don’t need to know what color.
Jeremy: Right, and not too much character development.
Kolby: And for this kind of thing, I don’t think you necessarily need...
Jeremy: ...too much of that, yeah.
Kolby: yeah, in the same ways.
Jessica: I agree. I think the story does, in a very, you know, limited about of space gives us a kind of scenario for us to mull over. It did remind me, I do want to say before moving on, that “Sophie’s Choice” is a fantastic novel and does a ton of character development and its heart breaking and it makes you cry at the end.
Kolby: I haven’t even seen the movie.
Jessica: The movie is also really good.
Kolby: I skimmed the Wikipedia.
(laughter)
Kolby: I haven’t. I’ll watch it at some point.
Jessica: I’m just saying the character development isn’t bad, but I think for the purposes of discussing a really interesting moral problem. It also reminded me of “Black Mirror” just the concept of, like.... So, I have trouble watching “Black Mirror” so I don’t watch...
Kolby: You’ll have to give me a background, I don’t know “Black Mirror.”
Jessica: Oh, “Black Mirror” Is a show on Netflix.
Jeremy: It’s on Netflix.
Kolby: I thought they were all individual one-offs.
Jessica: They are.
Kolby: So, you can’t just say it reminds me of “Black Mirror” because I have to know what episode.
Jeremy: Sorry. I think the reason why it reminds me of “Black Mirror” in general is because I think at the end of “Black Mirror” perhaps, and my personal fault in this, I didn’t realize that it is really set up to have you these kind of same “After Dinner Conversation” discussions. Right?
Jeremy: Absolutely.
Kolby: That’s exactly what “Black Mirror” is.
Jessica: But, I have such a hard time just digesting the content that I don’t watch it because it’s too horrifying and I’m a horror writer.
(laughter)
Jessica: So, I find it funny that I just realized sitting that, “Oh, that’s exactly what the “Black Mirror” is doing””
Kolby: The other one is “Love, Death, and Robots” on HBO, also same thing. Each episode is 8-15 minutes. It’s animated.
Jessica: Really?
Kolby: And it’s really just a “here’s a one-trick pony” sort of story but, the trick is always really good.
Jessica: Ok, alright. So, Kolby, one of the things you said was you liked this story because it set up the situation and gave you something to think about on what choice you would have made in this situation. So, well, what did you disagree or did you agree with what happens at the end?
Kolby: Yea, I took I different tact. So, when I see these sort of situations I am of the opinion, and this is tangential to the story a little bit in that, when you pay a kidnapper...
(loud cat noises)
Kolby: Wow, holy cat fight.
Jeremy: Over the bathroom, of course.
Jessica: Again.
Kolby: Again over the bathroom with the litter box. When you pay a kidnapper, you’re telling people, “You should probably kidnap.” When you pay a pirate who steals a ship, to get your ship back, you’re telling them they should do something...
Jeremy: That it’s okay.
Kolby: If being the sort of...
Jeremy: You’re establishing a norm.
Kolby: You’re establishing it’s worth doing.
(cat meow)
Kolby: Wow.
Jessica: Again, we’re in a cat lounge, there’s cats.
Kolby: And so I think, even in this kind of case, if you’re doing it quote-unquote right, if the person says, “Look, we’ve got two people and we’re going to kill one of them”, I think you smart bomb the building that both of them are in and you’re like, “look...”
Jessica: But they couldn’t locate the building.
Kolby: Or in the case of the kidnappers or in the case of the pirate ship, if someone’s like, “How much will you give us for the pirate ship?” You blow up your own ship and you’re like, “Just so you’re not clear, you will never make money doing this.” And then you don’t get elected president again. Let’s also be clear.
(Laughter)
Jessica: Kolby is not running for president.
Kolby: No.
Jessica: So I think that’s a very interesting approach.
Kolby: It’s a logical approach, it’s not a very useful approach.
Jeremy: Empathetic approach.
Kolby: It’s not an empathetic approach.
Jessica: Well, yeah, it might be hard, especially in this scenario. We don’t know where the kidnappers are or the hostages. But it is interesting when we talk about, like so, is this idea that giving terrorists or giving people that either pirates or jihadist or giving them airtime on social media.
Kolby: You’re giving them exactly what they way.
Jessica: Is exactly what they want; so that is the pay-off. And there’s this idea that if we can squash that, if we can remove them from social media, if we can remove, if we can get Twitter to do that or we can get YouTube to do that, they are not getting the payoff and recruitment that they were hoping to get by doing this, but then that also represses the horrors that are happening, and represses freedom of speech.
Kolby: So, one of the things that came up, I think it was New Zealand, they had their first mass shooter in ever, and all the newspapers and the press and everyone cooperatively agreed that they would never say the name of the person.
Jeremy: Right. And you’re starting to see that more often now. And that’s been one of the suggestions that psychologists or everybody has been making is this don’t release their name because this is promoting it to other people who would be copycats and make them before famous.
Kolby: I feel like they want to be famous for it. I think, it doesn’t really go into it in this story, but I think that’s why the terrorists in this story do this is they don’t really care if one person or two person dies, they care if they’re on the news having made the US government choose who dies. And so in that sense, I mean, I guess that they...
Jeremy: They made the right decision.
Kolby: They made the right choice. But, now do you want to be the one to make that phone call to either one of these people parents, families and be like, “hey, we made the good choice but bad news about your whatever?”
Jeremy: And that is one of the things near the end when Thurman is thinking about all these things is specifically that comes up, is who is going to tell the families of these people this is what happened.
Jessica: So, I want to throw some scenarios at your guys. So, would this story have been different if it was a soldier, a US soldier and a soldier from a different country?
Kolby: Shouldn’t be. I would say though, that if it was a soldier and a non-solider...
Jessica: The solider dies. We get that.
Kolby: Yeah, you signed up for that.
Jessica: You signed up for that.
Kolby: Yes, you get free college tuition.
Jessica: Thank you very much for your service. I’m not saying anything but... I think the soldier would also make that choice.
Kolby: Because they know what they signed up for.
Jessica: Right. Would it be any different if it was somebody with an outstanding service record and what’s-his-face, the, who is the director? BRR BRR BRR halt?
Kolby: Someone who defected.
Jessica: Yeah. Somebody who defected from the United States Army.
Kolby: To me, and this is why I think.... this part I didn’t care about this story... the idea that one person is gay, one person is a Jewish woman, I don’t care. You’re not worth more or less because you’re gay or a Jewish woman. I don’t care about that.
Jeremy: But I think they were doing that to begin that discussion, how do you choose? What are all the factors? And the commander says, “It doesn’t matter who you choose, somebody is going to be upset, so the only choice is to not make a choice.”
Jessica: I think it’s interesting. I think the writer did that intentionally to kind of lead us down this idea of evaluating soldiers with like, pro and con’s list and the story didn’t go that route. Which, I thought that was very good, that would make me very uncomfortable, but I, not that being uncomfortable is a bad thing, I love to be uncomfortable, but that we can’t, we to send us down that route of pro and con and they just say, “like it doesn’t really matter, we don’t negotiate.” But I do think about that pro and con list. Like, would it have made a difference had he said that she was pregnant? I don’t, I mean, I don’t know...
Kolby: That might’ve to me actually.
Jessica: Really?
Kolby: Yeah, because here’s, yea...
Jeremy: Because then an innocent civilian.
Jessica: I guess. It’s not an innocent fetus. It’s a clump of cells.
Kolby: Yeah, but, I know, but, and I understand that’s, but I just feel like it has the ability to become a person, it’s a whole thing. Like, I, yeah, I don’t know why that would’ve mattered to me.
Jessica: Huh.
Kolby: The thing that was disappointing to me, and I think it was written to be disappointing to me, it’s not that the writing was disappointing, was that the military was interested in which one was the worse story and so their reason for non-participation wasn’t for the reason’s we’re discussing. It was, “Well, it’s a gay person and it’s a Jewish woman.” But if the person hadn’t been gay and it was just a Jewish person, they’re like, “Oh well, the fallout would be less.” The only reason they did nothing because the scale was balance in the PR fallout. Not because of what we’re discussing which was, a life is a life is a life. Unless you signed up for it, unless you sort of stepped forward in whatever form that you do.
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: And so that part, I think, falls into that sort of toxic masculinity. Just shows the government is just as the sort of blanket inept PR related entity.
Jeremy: Right. What’s the best of the worst case scenarios.
Jessica: And I think the line that you read in your summary Jeremy about...
Kolby: To be thought less.
Jessica: To be thought less. I also found that it was an interesting assumption that the jihadist wouldn’t say, “Oh, they picked you? Great. I’m going to kill this person and then kill them, just kidding they picked the other person, kill them.”
Jeremy: To force the government to make a choice.
Kolby: Why would they keep their word?
Jessica: Exactly.
Kolby: Because the PR goal is for them to have made a choice. Not that we follow through on your choice.
Jessica: Right. Correct. And yeah, I think that...
Kolby: So, one thing I didn’t understand about this story, and I think it since the story perfectly fine, It just didn’t make any sense to be, is the main character Captain Thurman, why he hills himself at the end? Like, obviously because, there’s the Jewish woman...
Jeremy: ...who he’s engaged too.
Kolby: Like, I get that, but like, people’s engaged died all the time.
Jeremy: But he doesn’t want to see her beheading.
Kolby: Sure. Don’t watch the YouTube video; I’m totally down with that.
Jessica: But, so, I disagree.
Kolby: I just don’t know why he killed himself at the end.
Jessica: I don’t think it’s because he doesn’t want to see her beheading, not that he wants to see her beheading....
Kolby: I thought it was because he didn’t tell the person in charge that he knew her.
Jessica: So, I wonder if it’s this deeper. So, there is some hints through the story of this kind of personal struggle to have a relationship and there’s like, the relationship...
Kolby: You’re a cat whisperer.
Jessica: I have a cat that’s sitting on my story. I can’t reference it, so I’m going to have to go from memory; it has a pink bowtie on. It’s very cute. So, from memory there’s a metal that’s...
Jeremy: Right, he has a triathlon metal.
Jessica: Oh it a triathlon metal. Encased in...
Jeremy: Plexiglas.
Jessica: On the mantle and that’s it. And the relationship with the mother is a little odd. His decision to get married seems to be based on that there is a metal there and it would look good with a diamond ring. I don’t know.
Jeremy: It’s a little...
Kolby: It’s a little hard to follow.
Jessica: So, I wonder if he has just a very difficult time...
Jeremy: Interacting with people in general.
Jessica: Interacting with people in general and then he finally finds somebody that he is in love with, and then he can’t act in a way to save her and withheld information and living with that, is too hard. This idea that, “I was involved in the decision and I did nothing and she dies and therefore, it’s...”
Jeremy: It’s his fault.
Jessica: It’s his fault.
Jeremy: I can see that.
Kolby: I also think that had he been doing this right, and maybe he even had an obligation to, I don’t know anything about the military, he should have told somebody. He shouldn’t have even been in those rooms, right?
Jessica: Yeah.
Kolby: He should’ve been like, “hey, by the way, I’m engaged to this person.” They’d be like, “We understand. We’re going to show you to the other room. We have somebody who’s going to fill your place for you. This is not your problem anymore.”
Jessica: Yeah.
Kolby: But, it doesn’t serve the story to do that.
Jeremy: Correct.
Jessica: What I would say is that, oh how to put this...
Kolby: You’re going to try to not get yourself in trouble?
Jessica: Yep. I think...
Kolby: Don’t be a disappointment to your daughter. Don’t be a disappointment to your daughter.
Jessica: I think a lot of white dudes think that they can act in a way that is unbiased in...
Jeremy: In those situations.
Jessica: In those situations.
Kolby: Because that’s the manly thing to do.
Jessica: Right. Going back to that idea that we we’re talking about with like toxic masculinity, Here’s, you know, he says some things that come from a place of toxic masculinity that, to me, he says I can. And he acts without bias for the most part.
Kolby: Until he blocks himself in the room by himself. But in public, he’s..
Jeremy: ...he’s compartmentalizing and...
Jessica: ...And he thinks, and this idea that, to go back to that idea of toxic masculinity, it is a societal problem that we do not allow men to say, like “Hey, this is going to personally effect me, I’m going to recues myself.” And we don’t let men do that. If women do it, and we allow women to do that, we absolutely do, we also think that’s very weak. Right, we’re like, “geez.”
Kolby: Man up.
Jessica: Uggh. Exactly. Man Up. Man Up.
Kolby: Grow a pair.
Jessica: Right. And so perhaps with the, maybe what we can say is that, the end of the story is perhaps a bit of a statement of the effect of toxic masculinity. This idea that you must be brave, you must be unbiased, and at the end it will kill you. Good luck white dude.
(laughter)
Kolby: I don’t know where I saw this from, it might’ve been a Simpson’s episode, I don’t know, but somebody is having a conversation with an old crusty old guy, and he said, “I don’t know what to do?” And he’s like, “You swallow that down, and you swallow it and you swallow it and you swallow it.” And he’s like, “really grandpa?” and he’s like, “yeah and then you get cancer in your stomach and you die.”
(Laughter)
Jessica: That is absolutely from the Simpsons. I totally remember that episode.
Kolby: But that’s, I think that is part of that culture of toxic masculinity of like, “I’m going to internalize and internalize and internalize because I have some societal obligation to take that on silently. And be the cowboy in the west or whatever.” As opposed to just being like, “Man, I had a hard day” or “I saw a Hallmark commercial and it made me cry.”
Jeremy: God, that Sarah McLachlan song.
Kolby: We went to the Musical Instrument Museum last night, and I’m watching this thing on the thing, and I’m like, “I’m going to cry”
Jessica: Kolby cried at the...
Kolby: I totally cried at the Musical Instrument Museum.
Jessica: Well, there was a really great exhibit about the kids, I don’t, it was Paraguay where kids were making instruments from trash.
Kolby: Literally going through a trash heap, and banging out and like getting....
Jessica: Beautiful violin and that cello, that was...
Kolby: They played better than you in a lot of ways.
Jessica: I mean, bar low.
(laughter)
Kolby: Out of a gas can by the way.
Jessica: And then I cried during Malory wedding ceremony, which I’ve seen that video literally a thousand times on YouTube, and still cry.
Jeremy: But you still cried.
Jessica: But very socially acceptable for me to boohoo through a museum...
Kolby: ..but not for me.
Jessica: ...but not Kolby.
Kolby: Yeah, I don’t mind crying actually. I feel like that’s how you know you’re alive. Like, if you’ve had a good cry, that’s how you’re like, “You know what? I still am able to feel things that make me cry.”
Jessica: I wish that I was more okay with crying. I’m not. But I cry all the freaking time. All the time. Hallmark commercials, trailers, to really terrible movies, I cry all the time. I cry all the time. My daughter loves to stare at me while I’m crying.
Kolby: My wife does the same thing. She’s like, ‘Are you crying?’ And I’m like, “Of course I am. I cry at everything, shush up.”
Jeremy: You should watch “Grave of the Fireflies.”
Jessica: (gasp) No, you shouldn’t. It was the like first movie Jeremy recommended to me when we first met and I never will forgive him for it.
(laughter)
Kolby: Alright, anything else about this story you want to discuss?
Jeremy: One of your questions...
Kolby: What are the questions? Was there one you liked that you wanted to discuss a little bit?
Jeremy: Discuss because it reminded me, you said.
Kolby: Hobson’s choice, I did find it.
Jeremy: Hobson’s choice... something about, should there be a criteria, should there be a pecking order of who should get saved first?
Kolby: For me, it’s just you’re in the military or you’re not in the military.
Jessica: Okay, but what about Titanic?
Jeremy: But, what this reminded me of, it references “The Radio Lab” or “This American Life”. There’s one of those about the hospital in New Orleans during Katrina where because of the fallout of this hospital, they, the medical community, has developed a process to choose who gets saved.
Kolby: Who gets taken out of the hospital in the event there’s a limited amount of time to do it?
Jeremy: Yes.
Kolby: I’m really glad it’s medical personnel who make that choice, but it has to be made.
Jeremy: Right.
Kolby: So, here’s the other one that I think has come up as well, is the concern about self-driving cars. That if they’re given a choice, you’re now relinquishing that choice of like, kid runs in front of the street, person on the side of the street riding a bicycle, and the car is now going to make this choice of which is more valuable or which has the higher percentage of safety of whatever. Do we want to remove these Hobson’s choice from our driving process? I’m going to take one quick tangent because I totally forgot about the questions. Are there times when you think, if it’s not a life or death Hobson’s choice, just the sort of you get one or you get neither, where it is okay to say I’ll take one? Like you can have pie or cake, but you can’t have both?
Jessica: Ok, so...
Kolby: I won’t take it away from the life or death scenario.
Jessica: Oh. I mean, that’s easy.
Kolby: Yes, the answer is yes?
Jessica: The answers cake.
Kolby: Okay. Alright
(laughter)
Jessica: I mean, unless it’s a crème pie, because we can have a different discussion. But, yes.
Jeremy: That’s our next podcast.
(laughter)
Jessica: Pie or cake?
Kolby: Pie or cake! Pie or death? Cake or death?
Jessica: Cake or death.
(laughter)
Jessica: Uh... Cake?
(laughter)
Kolby: I’m going to go one other question for you then, what about if you’re the general guy or the guy making those decisions and one of them is a family member, one of the people that’s captured is a family member?
Jessica: Don’t you recues yourself?
Jeremy: You absolutely should.
Jessica: OK, well, if you’re asking me, as like....
Kolby: Do you still take the moral high ground or do you say like...
Jessica: I will give you a scenario that is similar, but maybe not exact.
Kolby: Okay.
Jessica: San Diego is where I’m from, well, not where I’m from-from, but it’s where I live, and we get riptides all the time. So my husband was with me, and his best friend was visiting from Kentucky and we were swimming and we were caught in a riptide. Yep. So, I had the choice...
Kolby: That’s something from a movie.
Jessica: Yea, riptides are actually very common and they’re super easy to get out of.
Kolby: You just sort of swim sideways, just don’t panic.
Jessica: You swim parallel to the beach until you’re out of the riptide and then you swim in. You don’t panic, Alex.
(Laughter)
Kolby: Did Alex panic and try to swim against the rip tide?
Jessica: Well, I don’t think either of them understood that they were in a riptide. I think that if you’ve never been in a riptide before you don’t necessarily. But, I hadn’t either but I am a swimmer, so I was confident in the water. And so I had this choice to stay with them and try to help them get to the beach, or get to the beach myself. And I knew, like I was close enough to it and I did tell them they were in a riptide.
Kolby: That they should swim sideways.
Jessica: I did. But I don’t think they quite understood, or maybe believed, I don’t know. And so, I had to make this choice of whether I tried to stay with them, and I 100,000% picked myself.
(laughter)
Jessica: I swim parallel to the beach and swam in. I passed a lifeguard on the way in.
Kolby: “By the way, my husband’s out there dying. I saved myself so that I could come here and tell you my husband’s out there dying”
Jeremy: “I told them but they’re toxic masculinity is keeping them out there.”
Kolby: They don’t like to listen to me because I’m a woman. I tried to get the guy next to me who was a man to tell, but he wouldn’t do it. I thought they might listen to him.
(laughter)
Jessica: But It was one of those moments I got to the beach and it was interesting because I think before that situation, I always thought that I...
Jeremy: ...I would help.
Jessica: I’m very much, I love other human beings, I’m very into other humans, I think we’re all so amazing, and I thought for sure I would try to save that person, and I was like, “Nope, me first. I will save myself” And I knew there is extenuating circumstance, I knew there was a lifeguard on duty, I knew she could come out and save them, and by the way she did not have to pull them in.
Kolby: Did you think to yourself, “90% chance they’ll figure this out, I’m going to go swim for shore”?
Jessica: I don’t know that I thought even 90%, I thought maybe...
Kolby: 70%?
Jessica: 70%.
(laughter)
Kolby: Oh my god.
Jeremy: The odds are still good.
Jessica: Odds are still good.
Kolby: The odds are still in your favor.
Jessica: Yeah, so I will say, I mean that I made that choice in real life and it was not the choice I thought I would make.
Kolby: Well, there ya go. You are listening to After Dinner Conversation with myself, with Jeremy, with Jessica. We’ve had a great time talking about our Hobson’s choice in this story, “The Truth About Thurman”. I think we’ve decided that Jessica is willing to let her family die.
Jessica: Not my family, just my husband guys.
Kolby: Just her husband.
Jessica: I love you Alex.
(laugher)
Jessica: I swear, I would not let you die.
Kolby: And that because Jeremy has one, served in the military, we’d let him die first.
Jessica: Yeah.
Kolby: Because you signed up for life, right? You’re always, once you signed up your life, you’re the first one to go?
Jessica: I didn’t even think about that, but absolutely, but yea. Letting him die first.
Kolby: And we’re here in La Gattara with cats having a great times. We heard a couple of them having a disagreement over something. There’s probably a Hobson’s choice about the litter box. You either get one littler box or you get no litter box. And if you enjoyed this as much as we enjoy doing them, please “like” and “subscribe”. We have a heck of a great time doing it. We’re glad that you’re watching and that allows us to continue doing it. Next week, we have another story. You have the email with the story list?
Jeremy: The “Alpha Dye Shirt Factory”
Kolby: Oh the “Alpha Dye Shirt Factory.” This is a... I can’t tell if it’s a comedy or a tragedy, we’ll see, but the story is a fire breaks out, okay it’s a tragedy, out at a garment factory and one worker has to make a life or death choice. So, join us next week. And we’ll have that discussion and we’ll probably pick on each other a little bit more and pet some cats and have a great ‘ol time. Thank you for joining us. Bye.
E8. "Lay On" - Can a person be evil in their mind, or must it be in the act?
STORY SUMMARY: Three outcast witches are sent to San Francisco in the 1960’s to redeem themselves by causing corruption. They find drug addict street musician and his girlfriend and promise him riches and success if he kills and does as they advise. He does, and becomes a music sensation. Eventually, his girlfriend leaves him. He is finally brought down after his conversion is complete. The witches decide to stay and enjoy Woodstock.
DISCUSSION: This is a variation on Macbeth. The witches don’t seem to ever do anything, but simply to encourage him to do things we wanted to do anyway. He is so quit to turn. But maybe it’s not hard to find a degenerate drug addict musician? Was he always evil, and now he just had the chance to act on it? It seems he has a hole that he can’t fill regardless of how famous or rich. Really, he needs to focus on liking himself.
BOOK LINK: Download the accompanying short story here.
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“Can a person be evil in their mind, or must it be in the act?”
Kolby, Jeremy, and Jessica discuss the ethics in the fantasy short story, “Lay On” available for download on Amazon by Vera Burris.
Transcript (By: Transcriptions Fast)
Lay On
Kolby: Hi, and welcome back again to After Dinner Conversation, short stories for long discussions. Man, I’m totally going blank. Okay.
Jeremy: I’m your host…
Kolby: I’m you co-host Kolby...
Jeremy: I’m your co-host Jeremy.
Kolby: And my co-host Jessica.
Jessica: Jessica.
Kolby: Who’s now a veteran, this is her 4th episode.
Jessica: My 4th…
Kolby: 4th episode.
Jessica: 4th and final.
Kolby: No…
(laughter)
Kolby: No, we’ve got you for a while. After Dinner Conversation is a series of short stories and podcasts to have discussions about all these stories to encourage…
(cat meow)
Kolby: That’s a lot of cat going on over there.
(laughter)
Kolby: ...to encourage deeper discussions about ethics and morality and the things that matter so you’re not just spewing out the same 3 lines you saw on some TV show.
Jessica: Or on Facebook.
Kolby: Or on Facebook, for sure.
Jessica: Where are we at?
Kolby: We are La Gattara, cat café, which is why we have cats going everywhere freaking out.
Jessica: It’s a cat lounge.
Kolby: It is a cat lounge, although they don’t serve alcohol, but they do have cats. And they’re all available for adoption or you can pay $10 and come and just pet them and then you don’t have to have all of your stuff be pushed off of countertops at home. So, it’s like all of the benefits of cat with no cat. Also, you can download these stories…
Jeremy: The cats.
Kolby: Not the cats.
(laughter)
Kolby: Man, you’re really energetic for an early morning.
Jessica: I know.
Kolby: You can download all these stories on Amazon as well as…
Jeremy: Wherever you download e-books.
Kolby: … wherever you download e-books, podcasts, YouTube. And by all means, if you’re enjoying watching these, “like” and “subscribe”, it makes us feel good, it helps us do this more. Okay. So, our story for today is “Lay On.” Jessica, you’ve got the introduction for this one, I guess?
Jeremy: And who wrote it?
Jessica: “Lay On” was written by Vera Burris. Vera Burris, sorry. Vera Burris. And this story sets us in 1969. Our two main characters are Christopher, a musician, and his strung-out girlfriend Polly. And during, I think they’re on the street, and three women approach with a lot of money and give it to Christopher and tell him he will have fortune and will be the kind of music festivals and the envy of all those who wronged you and he asked, “Who do I have to kill first?” And they say, “You’ll know.” And then they go on and Polly arranges an audition for Christopher at a local bar. When they go, the guy who runs the bar basically says, “You can play but only if the other performer is a no-show or can’t go on.” And then Christopher decides that that must be the person he needs to kills and so he pushes that person in front of, I think, a bus?
Kolby: Something, something big that kills him immediately.
Jessica: Kills him immediately. Yeah. So, he gets to play and when he plays everybody loves him and he continues to get gigs and continues to do really, really well. During that, all the witches kind of look in and follow his progress and you learn that the witches were kicked out of their coven, I guess.
Kolby: Witch’dom.
Jessica: Witch’dom. And they’re trying to earn a place back in and with Christopher, they’re hoping will provide them the way of earning their place back in by being, I think by being evil. We’re really not sure what is the criteria of getting back in but just like, making him do awful things. So, they continue to watch him and say things like, “What does a good man with power do?” And other frightening lines like that. And then near the end, he’s a big deal, I think, help me out guys, what happens with Polly?
Kolby: She leaves him, I think, because she’s an addict or something.
Jessica: Right. And he won’t continue to support her because…
Jeremy: Because he’s got all these other girls on the side.
Kolby: That’s right. He’s hooking up with a... he’s got groupies now.
Jessica: He’s got groupies now. And at end, the witches come back and ask him if he’s regretful…
Kolby: He gets put in jail.
Jessica: Yes, he gets put in jail and Polly is not. And…
Jeremy: She calls the cops on him.
Jessica: She calls the cops on him.
Kolby: I feel like Jeremy is the only one who’s done the reading this week.
(laughter)
Jessica: Hey! Hey! I did the reading.
Kolby: Uh-huh.
Jessica: I did the reading.
Kolby: Uh-huh.
Jessica: It’s more important about the witches. And then the witches, the queen of the witches, Hecate, which we love from Lady Macbeth. I mean Macbeth, you can call it Macbeth, I call it Lady Macbeth. And Hecate comes back and lets the witches back in the coven because they have earned their evil place.
Kolby: But then in the end they’re like, “We’re going to hang out and go to Woodstock or something.”
Jessica: Yes, they do. They go hang out and go to Woodstock.
Kolby: Instead.
Jessica: That’s true.
Kolby: I mean, who wouldn’t if you could go to Woodstock?
Jessica: I mean…
Kolby: I mean not the 1999 Woodstock.
Jeremy: The 1969 Woodstock.
Kolby: The 1969 Woodstock, yeah. Jessica, you have thoughts? Things you liked, didn’t like? Enjoyed, didn’t enjoy?
Jessica: I very much enjoy a witch story, so anything with witches I’m going to read. I love a good witch story. I do wonder… my feeling with the, just to take the witches perspective for a moment there, so the witches get kicked out of this coven and they got to find somebody in order to manipulate to, I guess, cause mayhem and bedlam…
Kolby: Undisclosed bedlam.
Jessica: Undisclosed bedlam, yes. And I think that following their narrative so they find this guy and they’re trying to influence him, and then to get back into this coven but then they hang out because they’re having so much fun in 1969. I don’t know. I feel like it was an awful easy win.
Kolby: For the witches?
Jessica: Yeah! It’s like…
Kolby: It’s not hard to find a wrongdoer.
Jessica: It’s not hard to find a musician wrongdoer, let’s be clear.
Jeremy: Especially they bring up the Manson murders at the same time, which presumably is a much bigger evil than whatever Christopher did. And Hecate is like, “You guys do this? He did this on his own. Nobody had to help him, so why is this special?” But she still lets him in. And I guess that millennial participated.
Kolby: Did you just say Charles Manson got a participation prize?
Jeremy: No, the witches did.
Kolby: Oh, oh
Jessica: Christopher did.
Kolby: Alright.
Jeremy: The witches in the story.
Jessica: The witches in the story got a participation ribbon for Christopher, the effort of Christopher. So, I think…
Kolby: It’s simple for you.
Jessica: I don’t know if it was simple. I would love to know what you guys think about this idea of what makes evil win? If evil, presuming that the witches are a stand-in in the story for evil…
Kolby: Which is a little big anti-witch.
Jeremy: It is. From the research that I did…
(laughter)
Jeremy: From my knowledge…
Kolby: We should turn this into a drinking game every time you say “From the research that I did.”
Jessica: Yeah.
Jeremy: That’s not how Wiccans act. But it is a modern look at witch-craft is the recent Wiccan movement which started in the 60s. So, you know,
Jessica: I think this is definitely like the witch.
Jeremy: The Christian view.
Kolby: It’s like a stand-in of evil.
Jeremy: Right.
Jessica: It is like, the Macbeth view of…
Jeremy: Of witches.
Jessica: Of witches.
Kolby: Actually, I thought it was a Joker stand-in from the Heath Ledger Joker. Like, “I just do chaos. That’s my job.” “Why?” “I don’t know, it’s just chaos, this is what I do. ”
Jessica: Oh interesting. So, you don’t see the witches as evil but witches as chaos?
Kolby: Yeah. I did.
Jessica: Oh, that’s interesting.
Kolby: Obviously, a lot of their dialogue talks about their desire to tempt the worse in us. But it seems like generally they just wanted bad things, just bad thing, just craziness afoot. There’s a reason they’re staying at Woodstock.
Jessica: Okay.
Jeremy: Is to promote heathenism…
Kolby: To promote heathenism, yeah. But certainty...
Jeremy: Or hedonism.
Jessica: I was going to say, I can see that that’s an interesting take Kolby. I didn’t think about that. I did assume it was just evil, but the idea of it just being chaos or hedonism, or whatever, attempt the worst in us is an interesting…
Kolby: What’s the thing in movies where they have a sacred object that everyone has to get?
Jeremy: The MacGuffin.
Jeremy: MacGuffin. Yeah, I feel like the witches are a little bit like a MacGuffin in like, “We just need evil”, “okay we’ll make witches.”
Jeremy: They’re just a metaphor.
Kolby: But it could have been an evil vase, it could have been a magic 8 ball, it could’ve been… they didn’t act in a way that sort of was dynamically interactive.
Jeremy: No, they’re just providing access..
Kolby: Yeah, they’re providing the catalyst to temp this person to see what this person is really like.
Jeremy: Right. “Here’s cash and you’re going to know what to do to make the best of the situation.”
Kolby: And I think that is a little bit different than Macbeth, in that in Macbeth the witches are much more. They are the cause and the effect depending on how you look at it. They tell you you’re future, but the fact that they told you, makes you now think that future is possible, and if they never would have told you, would you have done it?
Jeremy: And that’s what they do to Christopher. They tell him, “You can have fame and fortune, and you’re going to know what to do to get there.”
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: So, one of the things I did wonder about in this story was, did they do anything or were they only encouragers? They said, “You’re going to have to kill a person.”
Jessica: No, they didn’t say that.
Jeremy: They didn’t.
Jessica: He said, “Who do I have to kill?” And they said, “You’ll know.” And I think that’s an intriguing part of it to echo off what you’re saying Kolby. I’m not sure they did anything, there’s no…
Jeremy: They were just enablers, they were “let me hold your purse”.
Jessica: Let me hold your purse, yeah!
Kolby: But the whole pushing the person that may have worked out the same way with or without them, right? He’d have pushed that person in front of the vehicle, witches or no witches; it might have gotten him the gig, right?
Jessica: And what I find interesting, I don’t know if anybody else read it this way, so you’re reading the story and the witches say or he says, “Who do I have to kill?”, and the witches say, “You’ll know” and they walk into this bar and the guys going to be on stage, the first performer, I can’t remember his name, and he’s like, “Maybe I have to kill him.” It’s so quick.
Jeremy: It is super quick.
Jessica: It’s like, “Maybe I have to kill him?” And I was like, so, you know this idea of tempting the worst. Like I would like, I don’t know, a thousand signs before I push somebody in front of a bus. Not that I would push anybody.
Kolby: You would need like a big neon arrow being like, “This guy”
Jessica: “This is the way to your future”
Kolby: “In case you’re not sure”
Jeremy: You see the money sticking out of his pants.
Jessica: Yeah.
(laughter)
Jeremy: Yes, here’s your thousand signs.
(laughter)
Jessica: Right, right. So, pushing him in front of the bus came really quick but then I thought also, that might just be Christopher. Christopher is like, “Okay? This is it? Okay, I’ll do this.” And so, I would love to see a story that plays with the, if anybody wants to write for submissions…
Kolby: Which we are always accepting.
Jessica: … that wants to write a story, I would love to see something that tempts somebody in the same way, but then…
Jeremy: It’s not an easy tempt.
Jessica: I would not say it’s an easy tempt. It’s just, what if, had Christopher pushed that person in front of the bus and then it not paid out? So, then they’re like, “Oh, okay…”
Kolby: So you want to make them fake witches?
Jessica: No, I mean….
Kolby: “Oh, we didn’t mean that guy, we meant the guy to his left. Oh, you’re going to have to push another guy.”
Jessica: Right. “You’re going to have to push another guy.” Or another guy or another guy. In this story it’s clear that this is the string of chaos that they’re looking for. And it works out for Christopher but, what if it’s not working out? What if it’s this temp that doesn’t work out and then you just keep trying? Do you keep trying?
Kolby: It’s like a tragic comedy.
(laughter)
Kolby: Like, “How many people do I need to kill? All of them.”
Jeremy: Yeah, isn’t that a Cohen Brother’s movie? A Simple Plan?
Kolby: Yea, that sounds like a Cohen Brother’s movie. So, one of the things I found really interesting about this story, for me, was the idea of, is Christopher bad in that he’s done bad things, or is he bad and now he’s been giving opportunity? The three of us are sitting here, are we secretly evil we just haven’t gotten…
Jessica: Let’s be clear- there’s no secret. I am evil.
(laughter)
Kolby: Okay, in your case. Were you evil before you did anything or because I feel like, is evil in the action or is it in the mind? And even if the mind never gives choice to that action, does it still make you evil? Because there are certainly times where I’m driving a car and somebody cuts me off, I’m like, “oh, if I could get in that car with a baseball bat, I would take care of them right now.”
(Laughter)
Kolby: But luckily, they drive away before I can pull up alongside them with a baseball bat.
Jessica: You need a podcast for when you drive. Clearly.
Kolby: I need something. And so, I do wonder if, you know that saying- “if you want to know what somebody’s made of don’t give them adversity, give them power” – because….
Jeremy: Right. Absolutely.
Kolby: Because there’s a reason that kings and dictators become the worst people often because they have the ability to be the worst people.
Jessica: That’s an interesting question. In particular in the story with Christopher, he’s tempted and he immediately throws somebody in front of the bus. But, then when he gets power, he ditches Polly who was there to help him. So, there’s not even the redeeming quality there where he’s at least loyal.
Kolby: No, no, no. I think once you’ve gone evil, you’re… I think he’s entirely self-centered. And I don’t even think it’s about the music, it’s about...
Jessica: The power.
Kolby: It’s about being loved. Being loved, adored, being rich, being… and so you look, and I think this is relevant in the situation we’ve been in the last couple of years if you look at like R-Kelly, if you look at Bill Cosby, if you look at all these people who are…
Jeremy: Empowered and entitled.
Kolby: Yeah, they are empowered and entitled and they are rich and there are people who sort of fix the things that….
Jeremy: That go wrong.
Kolby: … that go wrong and it happens again and again. And over a period of time you think…
Jeremy: “I can do anything.”
Kolby: Yeah. “I can do…
Jeremy: “I can kill somebody in the street and…”
Jessica: “… and nobody would care.”
Kolby: Wow. Where’d you get that quote from I wonder?
Jeremy: I don’t know.
Kolby: Yea, but that’s exactly it right? And so the question is, when you get that ability, I think there are more Christopher’s than we would like to think. And the only thing that keeps people from doing these things, and not in all cases but in many cases, is just I’m not a bajillionare, I’m not worth a million dollars, I’m not…
Jeremy: Or there’s a process through growing up where you develop a strong moral character. And even though people can be tempted and can do wrong in doing things that they think are right. But if you don’t have that strong moral character, or that hasn’t been developed in you, I think we all fall back on selfishness.
Jessica: Okay, so walk me back just a little bit with that statement. So how does one develop a strong moral character?
Kolby: I’m going to follow up with something, how do you know you have one until you’re given power instead of adversity?
Jeremy: That’s true. I don’t know.
(laughter)
Jeremy: Personally.
Kolby: As a person that doesn’t have tons of power, yeah.
Jeremy: I think in previous episode you talked about your daughter showing her or that we should teach the consequences of what people are doing, the good and the bad of everybody, and you realize….
Jessica: Yes, when we talk about history, don’t just tell a hero; sell the whole story of that hero so they understand that everybody is a complicated mess.
Kolby: Know that even good people are complicated.
Jeremy: There are consequences to all the actions. Everything you do. So, understanding that and there’s good and bad in everything, I think helps develop the ability to choose a moral path.
Jessica: So, okay, so, I’m following you. But, one of the things I would have to say, especially with our heroes, there are lots of times when there are no consequences for all the bad they did.
Kolby: Particularly historically.
Jessica: Especially historically, especially during what we would not consider bad. Slavery, that wasn’t necessarily considered bad back then, at least by the people that were doing it. And so there weren’t consequences, so how do you teach consequences? How do you teach that moral barometer when… I mean, there are lots of people now that are doing horrible things that have no consequences to it. R-Kelly still gets record contracts. Bill Cosby, is he in jail now?
Jeremy: Yeah.
Kolby: Probably still selling records.
Jessica: Probably still selling records. Somebody once said, they didn’t know me well, so they said I had a very strong moral barometer. But they said how did you learn that? And they assumed I was raised Catholic, I am not Catholic, but I was raised Catholic, and they wondered how my daughter would be raised to have a strong moral barometer without being raised with religion. And when we talk about…
Kolby: We were texting about this last night. This drives me nuts.
Jessica: I agree.
Kolby: This idea that people think that religion provides morals and without religion you can’t have morals. And I would argue just the opposite and this is a little bit of a tangent. I would argue just the opposite that if I’m not pulling the lever because I’m afraid I’m going to get shocked, that’s not a moral, that’s a fear. So, if I follow Christianity or whatever faith I believe in, because I’m worried about someone watching and judging and scoring me, those aren’t morals, those are fears. Those are fears of retribution. Moral is, to me, when you’re like, “Look, nobody is never going to know. It’s the perfect crime. No one will ever know. But no…“
Jeremy: But it’s still wrong.
Kolby: “I’ll know.” It’s wrong to me, so it doesn’t matter at all. To me that’s morality. And so, I think Christians can be moral, but if their reason for being moral is just…
Jeremy: The fear of punishment.
Kolby: … is the fear of punishment. That’s not morality. That’s not morality. Which is why it drives me nuts that people like non-Christians or non-religious people can’t be moral. I’m like, no, they can only be moral because they don’t believe there is a punishment waiting for them except for their own self-identity and their disappointment in themselves and their choices.”
Jessica: I totally agree. That’s a nice rant. Good job.
Kolby: Thank you. I’ve been storing that one up for a while.
(laughter)
Jeremy: Just for this story.
Kolby: Just for… that’s part of the reason for these podcasts, right? It’s the idea that you can have these conversations about the ethics and morals of these characters and these things they’re doing and choice they’re making and it’s about…. and I think the way sometimes you develop those morals, one: you just inherit them from your parents until you can judge them, but also I think the issue of just, you live life and you’d like, “wow, I was treated that way and I don’t like it.”
Jeremy: And I treated other people this way and now I have to deal with the consequences of that.
Kolby: Right. And now that’s I’m seeing it for the third time, I’m like, “Look, I’m not doing this because it is or isn’t, I’m doing it because it’s not just who I choose to be because I know what it’s like to be the kid that’s taunted on the playground or…”
Jessica: Or that kid that excluded.
Kolby: Or the kid that’s fat shamed or teased about being LGBTQ or whatever the case. And I think the interesting thing about this story, see the way I tied it all together, is if you take someone who’s in their, I assume the musician’s late teens/early 20s, who’s living on the street, who’s drug addicted or at least has a drug addicted girlfriend, and you say “Here is everything.” I am terribly disappointed that he just goes in this spiral of evil, but I am not the least bit surprised. And I think that he is the norm and not the exception.
Jessica: Really? I think I disagree. I’m a humanistic at heart. I know. So evil and still so humanist.
(laughter)
Jessica: I think it’s interesting, I think Christopher’s spiral can be indicative of some people and especially we can talk forever about Christopher’s decision and why he made the choices and how those choices are not necessarily choices. You’re living on the street, everything is horrible, and somebody says “You can have all the money you want if you just do this one thing…” it’s really hard to say not to that when life is so terrible.
Kolby: Particularly if nobody’s ever… if you’ve never had the experiences and sort of mentors explain to you why this is the wrong choice.
Jessica: I don’t know, I mean, I think society explains to you why it’s not he right choice. It’s not like Christopher pushed that kid in front of the bus and was like, “Oh, I’m sure everybody will be okay with this.”
Kolby: That’s true. I mean, laws are the codification of the community morality.
Jessica: And I think we can extend this metaphor into larger… like, this is why crime is committed in terrible neighborhoods because there is no way out unless we do this thing. What surprises me about Christopher’s character and what I would probably argue is that, there was no shame spiral, there was no…
Kolby: He doesn’t die realizing like, oh…
Jeremy: Right. We don’t really get Christopher’s perspective.
Jessica: That’s true.
Kolby: We get the witches perspective.
Jessica: And what I will say is, I think it would be… I think more people are apt to push the person in front of the bus to get out of a terrible situation and then feel shame and regret and not just fear but like, just terrible sadness, but also try to receive redemption in other ways. And I think that’s why the witches get back into the coven is that Christopher didn’t go that route. He didn’t have the “Okay, I’m now in a place of power where I have solved my issues and I can be a better person.”
Kolby: “I can lay off the horrible because now I can eat.”
Jessica: Right. “Now I can eat. Now my Maslow’s pyramid of hierarchy of being an okay human being is taken care of, so now I can work on self enlightenment.”
Kolby: So, do you put these into two tiers of issue? Like, one is the “I need, and so I have to steal or do whatever”, versus “I live without fear and so I do as I choose.”
Jessica: Right. Right.
Jeremy: I would agree with that.
Jessica: Yeah, I think that’s true. And we see a little bit of Christopher’s character in the very beginning where he’s trying to get enough money for Polly to get a fix. This isn’t just him feeding himself; this is him trying to take care of someone else.
Kolby: You ready to have your mind blown? I’m about to blow your mind.
Jessica: Blow my mind.
(laughter)
Kolby: What if...
Jessica: What if.
Kolby: ...they’re actually the same in that in the beginning for Christopher, in the beginning the issues are I’m hungry, I’m whatever, I’m whatever, I want people to like me but the real issue is I don’t like myself. I don’t feel loved. I have a hole in me I can’t fill. Once that is in him, whether you’ve got a little bit of money or a lot of money or a couple of groupies or a lot of groupies or a couple people to sleep with you or a hundred of people to sleep with you, that hole never gets filled. That’s the sort of Maslow’s pyramid where, yes, you’ve got food and shelter, but what you don’t have is a sense of love.
Jeremy: Emotional support.
Kolby: Emotional support and love and all those things. You want to talk about a list of people that are not every going to get married? Rockstars because that hole is still not filled in the way it can be and so, he’s continuing to try and meet his sort of pyramid of needs but he doesn’t understand that money and groupies is not the thing that fits, that sort of fills the last spot in the pyramid. Boom.
Jessica: It did not blow my mind.
Kolby: It did not blow your mind?
Jessica: Sorry.
Jeremy: But again, does that come down to choice? That comes down to a choice where what would fill the hole is enlightenment and...
Kolby: Yoga.
Jessica: Right. Sting.
Jeremy: ... becoming a good person at that point.
(laughter)
Kolby: So, yes, so here’s one I’m always amazed by, and I’m broad brush stroking this right? So, Harrison Ford is a carpenter and gets picked up for a couple of movies and Star Wars and Indiana Jones and all these things. Then he becomes, at one point, he had starred in like 7 of the 10 highest grossing movies at one point in like 1989 or something. And what does he do? He marries Calista Flockhart or whatever her name is. And goes to a ranch in Wyoming where he just lives. Right? And that’s it. And he does a few movies once in a while that are pretty mediocre but he’s full. That to me is... that’s our person that could’ve been Christopher because he’s literally Han Solo. That guy is not hurting for lady friends or money or jobs or anything. And he’s like, “no, I’m perfectly happy learning to fly a Cessna, living in Wyoming, and doing cowboy stuff.” That to me, is what you wish Christopher were. A person, maybe that they don’t have to remove themselves from society, but that they understood that I am enough without the fact that I’m Han Solo or I’m whatever.
Jessica: Yes. I think you’re correct in that Christopher has a need greater than Maslow’s pyramid and that is what makes him continue to be such a jerk for the rest of the story.
Kolby: Right. He never has enough. He never has enough, where he’s like, “Maybe I should go to a cancer shelter dressed up as Iron Man or whatever.
Jeremy: And is this why they choose him?
Jessica: Oh, Yes! Okay.
Kolby: That’s an interesting question.
Jessica: Oh, now I get it. Yes. And that’s why he gets back, why they get back in, is that they can pick out that.
Jeremy: And enable the...
Jessica: The, yes.
Kolby: ... the worst in a person who’s unable to fill that worst.
Jessica: Yes. Or, you know prevent them from finding the people that would fill that.
Kolby: Yeah. I’m going to wrap this up after one last question. I’m going to give it to you Jeremy since you’ve been a little bit quieter on this one. Do you think the witches are evil or do you think the person that sort of hands you the machete evil or is it just a machete and you’re the one that chooses to make it a tool?
Jeremy: Morally ambiguous for sure. It depends, again, what are their goals? Is it really to foster evil? Then yes, I would say they are evil in that goal. It isn’t just a machete, it’s let me hold your purse, here’s a machete.
Kolby: Yea, here’s the reason I bring it up is particularly the climate we have right now, there are some that would argue that words are the equivalent of handing someone a machete. By telling someone it’s okay to hate, it’s okay to dislike, it’s okay to be xenophobic, it’s okay, that you’re metaphorically putting that machete in many people’s hands. And some of them may never choose to swing that machete, but you are at the very least giving them the green light to have the machete.
Jeremy: Exactly. You know, who do I have to kill? You’ll know.
Kolby: You’ll know. Who do I have to hate? You’ll know.
Jeremy: And it’s really in that statement they’re enabling him to be his worst.
Jessica: And I would argue that the witches are maybe just a little bit different than the idea that words are the machete in that, I think, if...
Kolby: They’re a little more encouraging.
Jessica: Well, I would say is the witches are enabling one person. I think if we wanted to see a truer, at least a truer metaphor, if the witches were making it normal that we push people in front of busses, that is the words in our society. Being able to say, “Yes, these words are terrible but also we’re not going to judge you if you use them. We’re not going to judge you if you push people in front of busses. Go for it.” That is where the metaphor becomes more parallel.
Kolby: Yea, that’s fair. You have been listening to After Dinner Conversation with myself Kolby and Jeremy and Jessica. We were talking about “Lay On.” If you enjoyed this story and haven’t read it yet, you can get it on Amazon as an e-book, you can go to the website Afterdinnerconversation.com. If you enjoyed this podcast please “like” or “Subscribe”. It’ll make us happy and be able to do more of these. And once again we are at La Gattara where they have cats that are available for adoption for $20, $30 or whatever. Or you can just pay $10 and come hang out with cats and they have Wi-FI and why buy a $10 espresso so you can use their Wi-Fi when you could perfectly well hang out with cats and use their Wi-Fi and there are cats.
Jessica: Bring your own espresso. You make it the way you want it anyway.
Kolby: Bring your own espresso. Whatev. And if you have a story idea like this in your head, you’ve got your narrative version of the trolley problem, then email it into us from our website afterdinnerconversation.com and we will take a look at it, and if it’s good enough, yours will be one of the ones that we discuss here. Thank you.
E7. "Are You Him?" - If someone is crying, are you the kind of person that would stop?
STORY SUMMARY: A well dressed, older, black man is walking to work in a University town when he sees a college age white girl sitting on the curb crying. He decides to sit with her, and comfort her. As others walk by we are made aware of the daily micro-aggression of racism he must put up with every moment of his life. And yet, it’s clear he is able to shrug these aggressions off and live a wonderful life without anger. In the end, we find out the girl just found out her father has died. She wonders if the man is the angel of her father come to comfort her one last time.
DISCUSSION: Super interesting story showing the cumulative effect of racism and how it pervades so many decisions. It’s a bit sad that the only way to create a caring black character is to get enough of their backstory to be sure they don’t have shady motives, while a white person wouldn’t have to prove their motives. The main character is just a man, but might as well be an angel he both makes us aware of the hundreds of decisions he has to make every day taking racism into account, while still not being hateful and trying to help others. Just a wonderful story about the way racism pervades every moment of life and decision-making.
BOOK LINK: Download the accompanying short story here.
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“If someone is crying, are you the kind of person that would stop?”
Kolby, Jeremy, and Jessica discuss the ethics in the short story, “Are You Him?” available for download on Amazon by John Sheirer.
Transcripts (By: Transcriptions Fast)
Are You Him
Kolby: Hello and welcome back to After Dinner Conversation, short stories for long conversations. So, all the things that we do each week, you can do with your friends. You read stories, you think about them, you discuss them, you argue over it, ideally maybe you have an adult beverage, you try not to end a friendship over it...
Jessica: Making no promises.
Kolby: Making no promises. And at the end of the day you’ve learned a little bit about yourself and the way you think and why you think what you think, which is really the goal, whatever that may be for you. After Dinner Conversation stories are available on Amazon for download. They’re also... you can catch the newer ones at our website Afterdinnerconversation.com. If you’re enjoying this podcast or YouTube tube video, you can “like” and “subscribe”. That would make us very happy. We are at, once again for our 5th episode, 6th episode? I don’t know, we’re pretty far in now, 7th episode, a ways? Who knows? We are at La Gattara.
Jeremy: La Gattara.
Kolby: La Gattara. And all of these cats are up for adoption. This one in the video...
Jeremy: This is Hemmingway.
Kolby: If you’re watching the video, it’s Hemmingway with a bowtie.
Jessica: Hemmingway is so cute!
Kolby: Because pretty much every cat with a bowtie is pretty awesome. So, if you don’t want to adopt a cat but you just want to visit cats, you can also come by and for like $10 they’ll let you come and hang out. And they do...
Jeremy: It’s a lounge, not a café.
Kolby: Yeah, and they also have special nights where they have yoga and bingo nights and movies nights and all sorts of stuff.
Jessica: And hang out with these adorable cats.
Kolby: So, yea, if you’re not ready to commit to a cat, you can just visit a cat.
(cat jumps on table, stands in front of camera)
(laughter)
Kolby: Or you can have a cat who blocks your camera.
Jeremy: Hi.
Kolby: Hey down front, hey down front. There you go.
Jeremy: There you go.
(laughter)
Kolby: Okay, so the story, or, I’m Kolby....
(bell ringing)
(laughter)
Kolby: Kolby your host...
(laughter)
Jessica: Are you going to bleep that out in post?
Kolby: I’m going to.
Jeremy: Yes.
Kolby: I’m Kolby your host...
Jeremy: And I’m Jeremy.
Kolby: ... And I’m here with co-host Jeremy and Jessica.
Jessica: Hello.
Kolby: And lots of cats who are hearing us who are really excited. There’s no way that camera is going to stay up there.
(cat is in front of camera, then jumps off)
(laughter)
Kolby: We’ll see how that goes. In any rate, our story today is “Are You Him?”
Jeremy: By John Sheirer.
Kolby: By John Sheirer, yeah. And Jessica, you got picked to do the...
Jeremy: Nope.
Jessica: No.
Kolby: That’s right, Jeremy’s got his... oh my gosh....
(laughter)
Jeremy: This was a long story. So, it’s a long summary.
Kolby: So, Jeremy....
Jessica: Jeremy is amazing at summaries and the rest of us are terrible.
Kolby: Jeremy is setting the bar for summaries.
Jessica: Yes.
Kolby: So, if you haven’t read the story, ideally you would read the story before you listen to the podcast so you would know what we’re talking about. But Jeremy has taken it upon himself to give you a little summary of it, so in the event you don’t have the time to read it...
Jeremy: You’ll know what we’re talking about.
Kolby: Yeah. You can sort of visit anyway and tune in. Alright, so Jeremy, go ahead.
Jeremy: Alright. So, the story opens on our protagonist, Arthur, in the middle of his morning walk to work. After picking up his coffee, the color of which establishes that our protagonist is black, he notices a young woman sitting on a stoop and crying down a side street. Prompted by memories of his own daughter distressed as a teen he finds himself moving towards her to offer aid. After a moment of being startled, the woman realizing that Arthur’s not a threat returns to her sobbing. Arthur addresses the girl, assumes she’s a college student and is probably crying over a romantic breakup. This leads him to several paragraphs of exposition where Arthur provides his own romantic back-story. Arthur married his childhood sweetheart at 18 and after a tour in the army, he and his wife Donna, bought a house down the street from their childhood homes and turned their started jobs into successful mid-level manager careers, fully establishing that Arthur is not a sexual predator in this scenario of middle aged man approaches vulnerable young woman.
(laughter)
Jeremy: Arthur decides to sit next to the girl on the stoop, belatedly asked for permission when she stiffens and asked if she’s okay or wants to talk or that he’ll just sit with her for a few minutes until she feels better. After a couple of minutes of quiet sitting, Arthur notices two white men walk by and that one of them notices the situation: a large black man sitting next to a small white woman in the semi-hidden space. The white man continues on, Arthur guessing that their appearance, his middle-aged and well dressed, hers, their voluntarily not in immediate jeopardy, seemed to not alarm him enough to cause a confrontation. Arthur’s concern though, and mentally goes through possible scenarios of what if he called 9-1-1, which takes him through past memories of racially profiling and how times were and how times are changing and that this was happening to him less frequently and how being a big black guy sometimes had its advantages. But, in this scenario...
Kolby: That’s his quote. His big quote-unquote, big black guy. That’s the phrase he uses.
Jeremy: So, these realizations prompts Arthur to stand up and prepare to leave and at this point the girl has mostly stopped crying and meeting his eyes offers that she just received a call that her dad unexpectedly had died earlier that morning. She asks if Arthur is her dad, come to sit with her one last time to let her know that everything would be okay. And he says he doesn’t know and then the girl thanks him if he has a daughter and then tells Arthur that she is lucky to have him. So, Arthur and the girl part ways and Arthur and pauses to text his daughter a few essential words that needed to be said right at that moment, feelings that he resolved to express to her more often, and then heads to work.
Jessica: Good summary.
Jeremy: Thank you.
Kolby: Good summary. Jessica?
Jessica: Yes?
Kolby: What’d you think? Things that stuck out or jumped out you liked, didn’t like?
Jessica: So, I think probably, the thing that I liked the most was, I felt, well, I did not expect that the woman who was crying on the stoop for her loss to be her dad. And I think the protagonist goes through some scenarios that are related to romantic relationships.
Jeremy: And this is the author of the story really pushing you in this direction.
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: And very subtle good ways, right?
Jeremy: Yeah.
Kolby: It’s a very soft hand.
Jessica: But I also think it’s definitely one that, you know, if we saw somebody crying on a stoop, we would, especially...
Kolby: Near a college.
Jessica: ... a young white girl or a young white woman, we would assume that it is probably a romantic relationship.
Kolby: Because what else could white women have to cry about?
Jessica: Right. Exactly. And I did love that she asked if he was her dad. I just very much enjoyed that moment. And I wondered for myself, if presented in that situation, how would I have answered that. I love that he says, “no” and then he says, “I don’t know”. I love that because I think it says a little bit about the protagonist in the story and a little bit about his belief system or…
Kolby: It mentioned he goes to church. Him and his wife go.
Jessica: I just enjoyed that part of the story. It was very unexpected. It was a very soft and tender twist for me and I think it’s just very pretty. I liked that part of the story.
Jeremy: I liked the story; how well-written the story is; how well the author brings you back and forth between his internal memories and the events that are actually happening in the story. That the transitions are smooth and very well done.
Kolby: I thought from a writing stand point, this is probably just technically the best writing that we’ve probably read so far. It was just so smooth. It was just so much craft to it.
Jeremy: Right. And how the protagonist is really concerned about all these things, and then you see the girl is completely in a different place. It’s not romantic, she’s having this deep existential problem….
Kolby: …these sorts of parallel processes going on. She’s thinking about her dad and he’s having this whole parallel….
Jeremy: Right. It’s really nice.
Jessica: From a writing background, especially when I’m critiquing a story or looking at a story, one of the things that my first checkbox is how has the narrator changed from the beginning to the end of the story. And if they haven’t changed, I have some doubts if it’s a short story or if it’s a vignette. If it’s just a snap shot of their life. And I do feel, in this, that the protagonist does change from the beginning to the end. He texts his daughter something that needs to be said. It was not just him being a good Samaritan, and he sits down on the stoop and look how good I was to this morning.
Kolby: He’s having a moment too by the end.
Jessica: He is. And I think, I forgot Hemingway was here.
(laughter)
Kolby: Because this is the first non-spastic cat we’ve had. This is the one you’re going to adopt.
Jessica: I can’t. My cat per square foot, I’m at my max.
Kolby: Two cats, their friends. Three cats, you’re a cat lady.
Jessica: Absolutely. So, I very much enjoyed that. And I didn’t expect it when I started.
Jeremy: Yes, exactly.
Jessica: And the fact that it kind of evolved that way was a really nice, a very subtle, as Kolby said, a very subtle story.
Kolby: I thought, so for me, I thought it was the strongest craft we’ve seen in a story yet, which I was really excited about to read. I thought the character, the main guy Arthur, I thought his views on race, I thought, were really complex in a good way. In a realistic way, which I was really interested to see because he is not the T.V. nighttime stereotype African American or black man. He’s a guy who went into the military, went on a G.I. bill, married his high school sweetheart, probably never dated, just dated the one girl and married her, he mentions that he’s saving up to get his daughter a car for a graduation present. And yet, he still experiences racism and he understands it and how he has to take it into account with his interactions with society. And I think that was interesting. And yet, he even says, “I inherently think all people are good, I think police officers are generally good with a few bad ones, I’ve experienced driving while black but I think that’s not the case.” But yet he is also very much aware is this person going to call 9-1-1 on me? Is this person, their understanding my attire that I’m dressed in a suit, and so I’m not threatening, and so he very much understand the racist world that he lives in, and yet doesn’t seem to harbor a great deal of animosity about it, which I don’t know how authentic that is, but it certainly read in a very intricate way that I really appreciated.
Jessica: It was definitely a complex way.
Kolby: I also think it made him really strong character because you realize that by stopping and talking to this woman, he’s not just doing something nice, he’s doing something nice at peril.
Jessica: Yes!
Kolby: As oppose to if you or I were to stop to talk to someone that was crying, we wouldn’t think, like…
Jeremy: … we’re at risk in the same way.
Kolby: Right. And I wearing good enough clothes that the person isn’t going to think I’m going to try to do something? Am I old enough that I no longer seem threatening, like a quote-unquote big black man? We don’t have to take in this large calculation before making the most basic human choice.
Jessica: Yes. And just to clarify for the podcast listening that are audio only, we are three white people sitting around a table with a bunch of cats.
Kolby: Yeah, that are black and white.
(laughter)
Jessica: But yes. I think the way the story was written, I think it showed the subtle, almost like an internal view of microaggressions and how they shape how you interact with the world on a day to day basis. Which is probably not something that most people who are not of color would know happens every single day.
Kolby: And they deal with every single day.
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: And the accumulative effect on how you interact with the world.
Jessica: Absolutely. Absolutely.
Kolby: And I think that’s what makes this character so angelic in a way is that he’s aware of all of it, but somehow refuses to internalize it in the same way a person would because that’s just the way it goes. One of things I also thought, it reminded me of another story I read, it was just a small part of the story, where a black man and a white man are walking in the south together, and a white woman comes out of a bar drunk and she’s really, like, fall down drunk, and she starts talking to everybody, and the black man immediately crosses the street, and the white guy chases after him. And he’s like, “why did you do that?” And he’s like, “well, black guy, white woman” and this was the 1960s when the story takes place, “if she falls on me, if something happens, if something happens to her…”
Jeremy: It’s absolutely all his fault.
Kolby: “… it’s all on me. So, I need to remove myself from that situation.” And the white person’s response was, “that’s pretty fast thinking” and the black character’s response was, “it’s just habit. I’ve been black my whole life.” It’s not fast thinking, it’s internalized instinct.
Jeremy: Ingrained behavior.
Kolby: And I thought this was a really good story to show how all those microaggressions and all those ways get internalized and how, just without even thinking about it, how you’re figuring that stuff out.
Jeremy: And the mental paths that it pushes him down, where previously in the first part of the story, he’s really thinking about his daughter in all the this and what possibilities of what this woman is going through and then as soon as there’s this brief moment with the people that walk by, the whole tone of the story changes and now he’s thinking about the potential situation that he’s in.
Kolby: And it’s immediate.
Jeremy: It’s immediate.
Kolby: Right. Because he’s been doing it his whole life.
Jessica: And in the writing one of the things I really enjoyed, was when the white dudes walk by, it’s a micro-second in their stride, it’s this pause that I don’t remember the phrasing that the writer used, and I’ve seen that moment, you’ve seen that moment before.
Kolby: When someone is doing a flash assessment of the situation.
Jessica: Yeah. And as a woman, if I walked by that alley, I would absolutely do the same. Flash assessment. Woman sitting on a step in an alley with another man…
Jeremy: … what’s going on, she looks in distress potentially.
Jessica: She’s in distress…
Kolby: Is she safe?
Jessica: Is she safe? Do I need to make eye contact? I think for women, there’s a lot of things that happen in that micro-second. So, yea, I think it’s a really good internalization event of that society.
Kolby: The conversation I wanted to have after reading it, and I think it’s because it’s a character that’s so 3 dimensional, I feel like I could talk to the person, I really wanted to have a long conversation about, “why aren’t you angrier?” or “how is it this doesn’t bother you?”, “how is it…?” And one of the parts, he talks about, “I see people who kneel, the football players that don’t kneel for the national anthem, and I don’t do it but I understand why they do.” And its like, of course you understand it! It’s not like you’re immune. You’re seeing all these things, and you’re describing all these experiences you have, and yet you’re not kneeling. And I’m like, “why aren’t you?” And not that I’m judging the person, everyone makes their own choices, but I feel like…
Jeremy: You’re wondering what is it then what’s making him make this choice?
Kolby: I could comfortably have an hour conversation with this guy about how he’s come to all of these conclusions when other people come to different conclusions. He even mentions it’s easier going to the mall with a white friend because you don’t get followed around as much.
Jeremy: By security.
Kolby: You don’t get followed by security.
Jessica: I think it goes back to perhaps, and perhaps this contributes to our greater discussion of a deeper conversation about the story, taking this story and then turning to two people that we don’t necessarily understand why they react the way they do. It’s very easy to judge people by the actions kneeling or not, standing for the pledge of allegiance or not, signing up for the military or not, and to have that discussion. I grew up in a very poor part of the United States, I know Jeremy did as well, and I know that lots of people signed up for military service to get out of it, but there were a lot of us that didn’t.
Jeremy: A lot of people that stayed.
Jessica: And a lot of people who stayed in that poor area, and my gut instinct is, “oh my god, get out! Why haven’t you gotten out?” But there’s lot of things that contribute to that person’s internal dialogue of how they deal with the world. And I think this is a glimpse into something we don’t experience, so that maybe we can grow a little bit of empathy. But, then to try and take that and grow a little empathy where is isn’t a story.
Kolby: So, I’m pretty sure Jeremy knows this, I don’t know if Jessica does, so obviously I was in the Peace Corps and I was in Mozambique, and literally the directions to my house, the way they gave it to people was “drive down the EN 1, which is the only freeway, the only paved main road, until you get to kilometer marker 137, pull over to the side of the road, wait until you see somebody, and then ask them where the white guy lives.”
(laughter)
Kolby: Because I lived back in the bush, so you couldn’t really find my house. You can’t be like, “hey take this dirt path.”
Jeremy: There were no GPS.
Kolby: Yea, there’s no GPS at the time.
Jeremy: None of the streets have names.
Kolby: So, you literally get off the public transportation because you just flag then down and tell them when you want to get off. Kilometer 137, where’s the white guy live. And everyone knows where the white guy lives because I’m the only white guy in this African village. I also have a clear memory of, I think it was “Molungo (sp?)” I don’t even know if it’s a derogatory term, it’s just what everyone called me. Like, “the white guy.” Or when I lived in China, we were always, it translated to foreigner, but it literally meant outsider, was the way people would be like, “whatever, outsider, outsider, outsider.” I just remembered thinking, “oh, every day forever huh? You get this every day?” And the main thing I took away from it, and then I’ll stop my little thing, I was amazed in some ways, and I’m not saying this is similar to the American experience or not, how quickly I forgot I looked different because I was surrounded by nothing from Africans. Like, not African Americans, but Africans, day in and day out, month after month, years, and then I’d be walking down the street and I’d see a white guy. I’d be like, “hey, check out the white guy!”
(laughter)
Kolby: My friend would be like, “You’re the white guy.”
(laughter)
Kolby: I’m like, “oh my god, you’re right! I totally forgot!”
(laughter)
Kolby: “I totally forgot I’m the white guy!” Just because, I would see it and I would just, “yea, this is where I am.”
Jessica: And I think that also speaks to an experience where, and I’m making an assumption here but considering your role there, is that the white guy was not derogatory.
Kolby: No. There wasn’t a racial bias. I had a very privileged spot. Television shows didn’t show how I rob everybody and blah blah blah.
Jessica: And so, you got to operate in this idea of, “yea, I got to forget about my race because everybody loved me.”
Kolby: It’s like having a British accent in America.
Jessica: Absolutely. You can be a serial killer, I’ll still have a crush on you.
Kolby: Because you got a British accent.
Jessica: right.
(laughter)
Jessica: So, I think it’s a little…
Kolby: That’s great point. I did not have a similar experience. You’re right.
Jessica: But I think you would have remembered you were white if every day you were made to think, “oh, you’re white and you’re different and that’s a bad thing.” And then when that white guy walked down the street, your response would’ve been like, “(deep breath in) I fear for that white guy” as a white guy, and also is that a bad thing?
Kolby: Oddly enough, the guys who had it the hardest, and then we’ll get back to the story, is actually not the white American’s in Mozambique, it was the African American’s in Mozambique because they were lighter skinned. And so, the African’s were like, “what’s up with the lighter skin?” And the white people were like, “you’re a black guy, we have already got all the prejudices and so…”
Jessica: And that does speak to a lot of the biracial experiences in America.
Kolby: Going back to the story, did either of you pause or did you have any questions about the assumptions that he was making about her? He talks about what could a white girl possibly have a problem about? Only a boy. And he’s wrong. His prejudice, I guess you could say for lack of a better term, about her issues are entirely not correct.
Jeremy: That’s his experience with white privilege, and that’s his stereotype.
Kolby: That they couldn’t have anything to worry about.
Jessica: And although, I will say it’s not harmful.
Kolby: Right. It wasn’t a negative stereotype.
Jessica: It’s just a stereotype. I also find it, it’s one of those things as a woman, I always notice when the word “girl” is substituted for woman. Like in the questions, in the discussion questions at the end, it discusses about the girl and I’m like, “hmm, it’s not a girl, she’s a woman.” It was very well established by the end of the story that she was old enough to be called a woman. But it is something that happens with women all the time, is that we are called “girls”. And I do it myself, it’s a society thing, but it is a very interesting… it then makes the assumption “everything is not negated, but lessened.”
Kolby: Your problems can’t be complicated if you’re a girl.
Jessica: Correct.
Kolby: Yeah, and that is absolutely not true in the story or in life.
Jeremy: And I think I did that in the synopsis too, it was call her a woman as opposed to a girl at some point.
Jessica: Yes, I noticed it.
Kolby: That’s why you’re still sitting at the table. Didn’t get clobbered.
(laughter)
Jessica: It’s something, I think, is part to that whole stereotype you’re alluding to is…
Kolby: There’re other stereotypes going on here, not just the ones going against him.
Jessica: Right. But, in general, that’s not to say inf… what’s the word… infantilizing... haha! Infantilizing women does have negative consequences, but I will say, I think nobody wins in a who has it…
Kolby: Who has it worse.
Jessica: Who has it worse, right? But I think that, it is a stereotype he came in with but he also didn’t act on that stereotype. I don’t know. I think it’s all part of recognizing bias.
Kolby: One of the thigs she asks him, the title of the thing is “Are You Him?” Do you think… I think she says, “are you my father, is an angel?” Which the implication is are you an angel? I, first of all thought it was a great title for the story, but I also thought it asked… in a way it asked an interesting question, of course not literally, he’s not literally her father come back from the dead, but in the sense of is he a kind of angel? I was kind of like, “—ish.” I felt very -ish about that, like, “yeah, in a way you kind of are her dad.”
Jeremy: Exactly. And you are this visiting angel to do exactly what she needed at that time.
Kolby: It wouldn’t have served the story, but it would’ve been great if he’d been like, “yeah.”
(laughter)
Kolby: “By the way, the cure for blindness and a million dollars are buried under the house, start digging.” Then just gets up and walks away.
(laughter)
Jessica: Well and I thought in that idea of how would I answer? My first thought was would I have just said yes? This woman needs it. She needs it to be yes. She needs her father to come and sit with her, but then it’s super awkward the next time they meet in a coffee shop.
(laughter)
Jessica: Like, “no, not right now, I’m not your dad.”
Kolby: Like, “Right now I’m just putting air in my tires, I’m shopping for underwear I don’t need to have this moment”.
Jessica: So, I think it was a perfect answer for him to say, “no, I don’t know, I don’t think so.” I think that that’s beautiful. Because maybe he doesn’t know? Maybe. We see that he comes from a religious background, perhaps he believes that he was sent to sit on this stoop for a reason?
Kolby: And it talks about his religious background. I was a little jealous of his family. This is not necessarily related to our questions. He is the most perfect dad. If I had any complaint at all about the story, and this is low level complaint, he is a flawless human being.
Jessica: So, I wondered, did the author do that specifically so that white people reading it would not be thrown off?
Kolby: They wouldn’t look for bait of, “oh, he’s got other motivation”. Yeah.
Jeremy: Possibly.
Jessica: I worry that, not that I worry that the author did this, but I worry white readers would be thrown off by it and therefor…
Kolby: Even by the fact that she mentions it, that she was pretty.
Jessica: Or had his background been that he dated a ton, or was divorced, or had a bad relationship with his daughter.
Jeremy: Suddenly there’s these other motivations that are potentially…
Kolby: Even if the entire story happened the same way, when he got up and left, you’re like, “I bet… I know…” You start wondering.
Jessica: Yeah. And I worry that. And what I’m trying to say is, is it necessary that we can only, as white readers, we can only read flawless black characters? And if that’s the case, gosh- we…
Jeremy: Have a lot of work to do.
Kolby: A long way to go.
Jessica: have a long way to go. So much work to do. Because that’s real sad. We definitely would have not taken a second glance if it was a white dude that was sitting on a stoop with her and was divorced and was…
Jeremy: How would the story would have been if his thoughts are…?
Kolby: Presidential elections much?
(laughter)
Jeremy: No. How would the story would have read if while he’s having these thoughts of sitting next to her, they’re thought of “how do I hit on her?”
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: Then that would’ve hit on every stereotype of every thing that ever would of…
Jeremy: And what would the differences have been if this was a white guy, and this is what he’s thinking? A white middle-aged guy. Yes, there are all these other stereotypes, but how would that have affected this ending, where that’s not why she thought he was there?
Jessica: Yeah, totally. And even if, another interesting question to ask about this, all this internal dialogue that happens, all this internal backstory that happens, she is never privy too. But how would, us as a reader, had he been thinking about when he can ask her out? And nothing else happens in the story externally, how would we, as a reader, walked away from that story? It would have been a much different experience.
Kolby: I also think it would have been a different experience also if we’d gotten the entire story from her perspective instead of his perspective. Because one of the things that makes this character flawless, is as he’s interacting with her, we’re getting the flashbacks of the soccer practice, and the military experience, and the married your sweetheart, so we know his perfect intent when she does not.
Jessica: Correct.
Kolby: She just knows she’s having a bad day and he comes and hangs out. And so, from her perspective, it would have been, we as readers, maybe would have superimposed because of our own biases ill intent that by seeing it from his perspective, we know is not there.
Jessica: Right.
Jeremy: That’s a good point.
Jessica: I also think about does she think he’s an angel because dudes come and sitting next to her?
Kolby: Morgan Freeman. Because Morgan Freeman always plays God.
(laughter)
Kolby: So of course, if an angel is going to come, they got to look like Morgan Freeman.
(laughter)
Jessica: I was going to say some dude that just doesn’t hit, suddenly is an angel. That’s the bar, it’s so low.
(laughter)
Jeremy: Wow.
Jessica: Just saying.
Jeremy: We have a long way to go.
Kolby: We have a long way to go. I think that’s one of things though, that you’re right, I didn’t think about this as I was reading it necessarily, but I think you’re comments Jessica, make a lot of sense to me in that I think this story shows that by the way it has to be written, it shows there’s so much more work. I think as a white reader, I think you would be more forgiving of some mixed motivations that good can still come of, from a white character.
Jessica: Well, this definitely was something; I identify as LGBTQ and one of the things that definitely happened in the LGBTQ community with writing in the last decade, was there was this big movement of LGBTQ readers, “For the love of god, can we get not the perfect gay person? Can we get a villain that’s evil but somehow is not just evil just because they’re gay? Evil just because they’re evil”
Kolby: You can be gay and evil and have them be unrelated.
Jessica: Right! Yeah. And I thought it was such a good comment, and we have seen literature evolve especially speculative fiction, evolve since then to fill that void. But it was a void that people were, like, you know, we only get Morgan Freeman as God. That’s it. And we only got gay people who were the best friend, the very effeminate best friend but…
Jeremy: The supportive non-threatening male character.
Jessica: Correct. And that was all we were getting. And now we’re getting a more nuanced evolution of literature through that. And I think that’s good, that shows we’re moving in the right direction.
Kolby: That it’s becoming a characteristic as opposed to a trait. Like a defining trait.
Jessica: Right. Or a motive for that matter. It was definitely motive at that point.
Kolby: What was the TV show I’ve kept insisting that you watch?
Jeremy: Euphoria. HBO.
Kolby: Euphoria, where one the main characters is trans or transitioning.
Jeremy: Transitioning.
Kolby: It has a little bit, but it’s not he motivating character…
Jeremy: It’s a characteristic, but it’s not the defining characteristic for the character in this scenario.
Kolby: It’s like if she had blonde hair, it doesn’t matter in the thing.
Jessica: I was telling Kolby this on the way in, the reboot of the Jem and the Holograms comic book is frickin phenomenal.
(laughter)
Kolby: I’m going to have to read it or watch it now.
Jessica: Read. There’s no show.
Jeremy: Yet.
Jessica: Yet.
(laughter)
Kolby: I haven’t seen Evil Dead 2, yet.
(laughter)
Jessica: So, there are gay characters and there are trans characters in Jem and the Holograms reboot, and literally it just doesn’t come up.
Kolby: It’s not the point of their character.
Jessica: There’s like one, it’s definitely not the point of their character, there’s like one point where the woman tells the rest of the group that, “by the way I’m trans because you’re putting me on stage and this may come out in the press.” And they were like, “ok” and that was it. And she was relieved. There was definitely a plot line there, but in general, it was not the point of the story. That’s…
Jeremy: Where you want to see things.
Jessica: …where you want to see things go.
Jeremy: Some realism in our writings.
Jessica: Yes.
Kolby: So, you’ve been listening to After Dinner Conversations, short stories for long conversations. This podcast as well as all the other ones, are available on I-tunes, I-podcast, what’s it called now?
(laughter)
Jessica: Please stop.
Jeremy: Google play.
Kolby: No because they changed I-tunes to I-podcasts.
Jessica: Wherever you get your podcasts.
Kolby: Wherever you get your podcasts, also on YouTube. All of the short stories are available on Amazon. You can also get some of the new ones that haven’t been released as e-books yet on www.afterdinnerconversation.com.
Jessica: Hey Kolby?
Kolby: Yes ma’am?
Jessica: What if I was a writer and wanted to write a story for After Dinner Conversation?
Kolby: So, if you were a writer and you wanted to write a story for After Dinner Conversation, first I would advise you proofread your story before sending it in.
(laughter)
Jeremy: Because Kolby can’t read. I really have to read everything to him over the phone.
Kolby: We get a lot of not final products, I would say, but assuming you’ve proofread it and assuming you’ve asked yourself, “is this sort of a literary version of the trolly problem?” then the short story version of the trolly problem, which by the way nobody has sent it in yet but I bet it’ll happen.
Jeremy: It’ll happen.
Kolby: Now it will. Then please do send it in, because that would be amazing. We get a lot already; we probably get 3-5 a day that are submitted now.
Jessica: That’s great.
Kolby: But if we got 5-7 a day submitted I would not be disappointed. Particularly if any of those additional ones were good, or amazing or phenomenal or as good as this one. If we got 5-7 “Are you Him”’s a day, I would not be sad.
Jessica: So, where do you submit?
Kolby: You go to our website. Afterdinnerconversation.com
Jeremy: I think that was the questions actually.
Jessica: Where are the submission guidelines?
Kolby: Oh yeah, the submission guidelines are on the website as well.
Jessica: Thanks Jeremy.
Kolby: And if you’re part of…
(laughter)
Kolby: If you’re part of do a trope or, what’s the other one…
Jessica: Submittable…
Kolby: Submission grinder, which is a weird name for a submission thing. We actually just finished a little while ago our writing competition and in a couple of weeks we’ll do that story as well. By the way, that’s the other cool thing about submitting, what do writers want? They want their story not only read, but discussed and what better way than to be, “yea, we’re going to discuss your story for a half an hour with cats.”
Jessica: A cat names Hemmingway.
Kolby: That pretty much sells itself.
Jessica: I agree.
Kolby: So next week, we have “Lay On.” Three outcast witches visit the hippy era to tempt a street musician. And it definitely sort of flavors Macbeth.
Jessica: Some genre’s going on. Some speculative fiction.
Kolby: Are you going to have a long paragraph like Jeremy to discuss it?
(silence)
(laughter)
Kolby: Okay, okay. Well, hopefully Hemmingway will not be adopted yet and he’ll still be here for us next time we’re back.
Jessica: Yeah, I hope so.
Kolby: Thank you for joining us. Bye.
Jessica: Bye.
E6. "As You Wish" - If you could change anything about yourself, would you ever stop?
STORY SUMMARY: Children’s story that starts with a bunch of old tattered stuffed animals being found in a trunk by a woman. She can talk to the stuffed animals and says she will fix them back up. At first, the requests are simple, fix a torn ear, replace a missing eye… but later, the stuffed animals ask for more changes. The unicorn wants its horn removed. The panda wants to be less fat. The zebra wants its stripes removed. The final character, Sad Bear, who is always sad because he has a frown sewn on, is offered the chance to have his frown removed. He declines the offer to fix his sadness, because, he says, it is who is is, and he is okay with who he is.
DISCUSSION: This is a story about what we change, and how we accept others, and ourselves, as we are. What is an acceptable change? Fixing vision and teeth are fine, of course, but what about taking anti-depressants or body augmentation? Can we be accepting of others when the choose to make changes that we think are silly, or superficial? When it is okay to be clinically depressed, and simply accept that as who you are, or does it have to be fixed?
BOOK LINK: Download the accompanying short story here.
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SUPPORT: Support us on Patreon.
“If you could change anything about yourself, would you ever stop?”
Kolby, Jeremy, and Jessica discuss the ethics in the children’s short story, “As You Wish” available for download on Amazon by Tyler W. Kurt.
Transcript (By: Transcriptions Fast)
As You Wish
Kolby: Hi and welcome back. You are here for After Dinner Conversation. After Dinner Conversation is a series of short stories and podcasts. Short stories for long discussions. I’m going to get that right someday. And we’re here again. I’m your co-host Kolby with co-hosts Jeremy and Jessica. And we’re once again in La Gattara, a place that adopts cats out because they’re awesome. We were playing with the cats beforehand.
Jessica: Kolby made me stop.
Kolby: Yea, we had to stop to actually work.
(laughter)
Kolby: And they are amazing. So, you should definitely come by. They’re in Tempe Arizona if you’re in this area. Come and check them out. Also, if you enjoy this please “like” or “subscribe” to whatever your thing is…
(laughter)
Jessica: Your thing?
Kolby: Well, no.
Jeremy: Wherever you’re consuming this.
Kolby: It could be on I-tunes, it could be on Stitcher…
Jessica: I use Overcast.
Kolby: Overcast. It could be undercast. It could be…
Jeremy: Google Play.
Kolby: Google Play.
Jessica: I bet you it’s on YouTube.
It is on YouTube. I know because I spend all the time editing the videos. Okay. And so, our story today is “As You Wish” by Tyler Kurt. And Jessica, you are our person. Now, Jeremy set the bar pretty high last week.
Jessicia: Yeah, he did. Now I’m stressed out about it.
Kolby: You should be.
Jessica: And I didn’t type it up.
Kolby: You didn’t rewrite the entire story and call it a summary?
(laughter)
Jessica: I didn’t.
Kolby: Sorry Jeremy. I got to let that go man. I’m self-conscious that I do such a bad job and you do such a good job.
Jessica: He did a really good job.
Kolby: He did.
Jessica: Alright. So, this is “As You Wish”, which is a children’s story. I believe this is your first children’s story to discuss on the podcast?
Kolby: It is actually.
Jessica: So, this is an all-ages story and it’s about Sad Bear and his friends. Sad Bear is a stuffed animal and his friends were stuffed animals that live in a trunk and they have no idea how long they’ve been in the trunk. Then one day the trunk is opened by an elderly lady and she can hear the toys and they can hear here and they converse. She has promised to fix them so that they can be adopted out to other children and the toy’s start requesting fixes. So, some of the fixes are like, “fix my arm that’s fallen off”, or “fix my buttons”, sort of cosmetic. And some that are asking for much larger changes to be completely different animals. Like, “I want to be a giraffe.”
Kolby: The giraffe wants a shorter neck, right?
Jessica: Yea, something like that. Wants a shorter neck. And we are introduced to Sad Bear and she asks Sad Bear if Sad Bear would like for his face to become a happy face. And he says “no” and I believe the other friends don’t understand, or perhaps it’s just that she doesn’t understand, the elderly lady who finds them. But he is very polite about it, but says he wants to remain to be a sad bear.
Kolby: And you read this to your daughter, didn’t you?
Jessica: I did read this to my daughter.
Kolby: And what was her opinion?
Jessica: She was unimpressed.
Kolby: Fair.
(laughter)
Kolby: But I thought the reason she was unimpressed was interesting.
Jessica: Well, I mean, if it’s…
Kolby: She’s like, “I found the writing derivative”.
(laughter)
Kolby: It’s like Toy Story.
Jessica: It’s like Toy Story. No, I think, I definitely spend a lot of time with my daughter in kind of an awareness and emotional intelligence standpoint and so we really try to accept people as they are. And sometimes you want to change who you are, and that’s totally okay. And sometimes, you want to be who you are, and we don’t need to change you to make you our friend. We will accept you no matter what. So, we really try to come from a place of always saying “yes” to people who want to be friend whether that’s, you know…
Kolby: That sounds like really good parenting. I’m going to cry.
Jessica: Well, it actually came, I think a “This American Life Story” about…
Kolby: Of course, it did, of course it did…
Jessica: … a teacher who, she met with high school students and asked high school students “why don’t you play with other groups of high school students? Why don’t you guys hang out? What if you guys just said “yes” whenever someone said they wanted to enter your friends’ group?” And they were like, “oh, maybe if you started with us earlier. Maybe if that was something socially acceptable earlier. Like, try middle school.” So, she tried middle school and middle schoolers were like, “try elementary school.” And elementary students were like, “maybe try kindergartners.” And kindergartners were like “maybe try preschool.” And so, she started teaching it in a kindergarten and it’s something that I’ve taught my daughter, just because there’s so much, especially with little girls, there’s so much bullying. So, anyway, I’m derailing us.
Kolby: No, so, the reason I bring that up is because I had a follow-up questions I was waiting for.
Jessica: So, you talked to me so you could...
Kolby: I prepped
Jessica: … ambush me.
(laughter)
Jessica: It’s a podcast ambush. So, my question is, first off, that sounds very progressive and very good parenting.
Jessica: I hope so.
Kolby: Accept people as they are. Like, everyone’s different, some people choose to be different than whatever, and if you want to whatever.
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: But, aren’t there things, like, if somebody comes in with ginormous fake breasts, don’t you I roll? I know you must.
Jessica: Ummm.
(laughter)
Kolby: You’re not like, well in your heart…
Jeremy: We know you Jessica.
(laughter)
Jessica: I’m Judgy Mc Judgerson.
Kolby: So, I know you’re not like, “well….” So, this is, I think the sort of weird thing about that thing, that what you’re saying is if somebody is saying “I’m transitioning”, you’d be like, “be who you are in the inside”. But, if somebody says, “I’m a D”, you’re like, “No, you’re a B. You need to be a B-cup and need to accept yourself for who you are.” And it’s like, “No, I’m a D-cup on the inside.”
Jessica: Right. Well, so I don’t think, and Kolby and Jeremy have known me a long time so they know I’m very judgy so it’s true to call me out on that; what I would say is that the one does not negate the other. Somebody who comes in with, I was hoping to keep this PG so talking about giant breasts is a little weird…
Jeremy: For a kid’s story.
Kolby: For a kid’s story. I didn’t even think about that.
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: I should’ve come up with a better example.
Jessica: Like giant fake nose.
Kolby: There you go. A Pinocchio nose.
(Laughter)
Jessica: That does not negate that they’re a human and that does not negate that can be friends with them. We can still…
Kolby: You can judge them and befriend them.
Jeremy: You can still judge them until you find out this was a nose reduction. You know. And they had a big Double-H nose before.
(laughter)
Jessica: Right. Right. Totally!
Kolby: So, what you’re saying, is I can be friends with people that I judge?
Jessica: I mean, that’s why we’re still friends.
Kolby: Must be.
(laughter)
Jessica: I’m judging you all the time.
Kolby: I know.
Jessica: And I still love you.
Kolby: I just wish you wouldn’t write it on the bathroom mirror.
(laughter)
Jessica: I’m sorry.
Kolby: Okay. So, to go back to the story, Jeremy, I assume you did not…
Jeremy: Are you done with your summary?
(laughter)
Jessica: Yes, was it too short for you?
(laughter)
Kolby: It’s a children’s story.
Jeremy: No, he interrupted.
Jessica: Oh.
(laughter)
Jessica: I was done with the summary, yes. Sad bear at the end decides to stay Sad Bear.
Kolby: So, one thing that I do want to point out though, is he is not just sad, he’s genetically sad, right? His face…
Jeremy: He’s drawn sad, he has a permanent frown.
Kolby: Right, because it’s sown on. And so, it’s like a clinical depression or whatever that’s he’s got, like a genetic depression that could be fixed. So, Jeremy what do you think? You’ve got a daughter, your daughter comes to you and says, “look, I’m sad all the time” and you go, “well…”
Jessica: You’re like, “Welcome to being a teenager.”
(laughter)
Kolby: It’s true. You’re like, “so what you’re saying is that you’re 17.” Do you think one way or the other about somebody who chooses to fix something that might just be hard coded into them?
Jeremy: It’s a really loaded question. It depends on what it is, because I feel like societally, we have different responses to different conditions. Where depression is absolutely a different condition than physical appearance, and where it’s much more acceptable to change your physical appearance than to take medication.
Kolby: To me, they’re the same. It’s like, “a broken arm is a broken arm”, you go fix it. But I understand. Socially…
Jeremy: There’s a lot involved in what. And how much do you try to not fix the problem in, like, make them change, but how do you solve the problem by being supportive and getting them the help that they need to understand if this is really a condition…
Kolby: Hard coded.
Jeremy: Right. Or something that they need to exercise more and this is just a chemical imbalance they have because they don’t exercise enough.
Kolby: Eat better, more sleep, exercise more.
Jeremy: Right, how much of it is a result of chemical imbalance as opposed, a condition as opposed to a…
Kolby: … so, in the case of sad bear….
Jeremy: Ok.
Kolby: Sad Bear it’s not the more exercise. It is literally sewn on his mouth.
Jeremy: Yes. It’s up to him at that point if he wants to change, then we should be supportive of his desire to change. We should be supportive of the giraffe’s desire to change his appearance.
Kolby: And if he doesn’t want to change…
Jeremy: Absolutely.
Kolby: … be supportive of the not desire to change.
Jessica: And I do want to point out, because I always feel like this is something that we don’t talk enough about, that especially when we’re talking about medication or depression…
Kolby: I would point out this is from the person who wears glasses.
Jessica: Correct.
Kolby: To fix her eyes.
Jessica: To fix my eyes. How dare I? Or, like, I have ADD. There is a definite societal bias to this neural normalcy. This idea that everybody needs to be the same and we all need to think the same and we all need to act the same, and anything outside of that….
Jeremy: … and look the same…
Jessica: Right.
Jeremy: … it sounds like you’re talking about the eugenics program again?
(laughter)
Kolby: We’re back to eugenics.
Jessica: This is a call back to “Pretty Pragmatism” which was last week’s episode. Please tune in and you can listen all about that.
Kolby: Way to keep it kid friendly. Good call.
(laughter)
Jessica: It’s only Nazi’s kids. Don’t worry.
(laughter)
Jessica: But I think that a lot of times we get caught up in this idea of what your thinking, feeling, acting, is not what everybody else is and therefor you need to fix it. And that is very ablest, that is very much part of this society of everything has to be homogenous and that’s not okay. There’s a lot…
Kolby: And I also think dangerous too.
Jessica: Super dangerous.
Kolby: If you look at homogenous groups, whether that’s Native American groups for example, because that’s a very small gene pool that all Native American’s derive from, that it creates risks as opposed to have a very diverse gene pool, whether that’s the different sort of things that are going on in people’s heads, whether that’s physical genetics, whether that’s whatever. It creates a resiliency.
Jessica: And I would say, especially with the way some of our greatest thinkers of our time were people that didn’t fit into the school setting well. Einstein was terrible at school.
Jeremy: Diversity is important for a lot of reasons.
Jessica: And that’s not to say that you must be a genius in order to be allowed to be abnormal; you must be super smart and then we’ll let you be in the abnormal group. But, that’s a thing. And I think that that’s what, when I read this story, a lot of the hackles that were raised and that’s not the fault of the author it’s just the fault of the topic, is that I’m immediately, “are we judging the group that wants to change and are we judging the…”
Kolby: I was.
Jessica: Really?
Kolby: I totally was. Yeah. I’ll tell you why. So, some of them I understood. You’re missing an arm because a dog ripped your arm off, okay, replace the arm. Your dress is bad, you want a new dress, okay that’s a little bit odd but whatever, take the new dress. The one that I legitimately got misty eyed on, we were talking about this right before we started, was the unicorn.
Jessica: I made fun of you.
Jeremy: For not wanting to be a unicorn.
Kolby: Because, it specifically says, “you’re unique and special.” And the unicorn says, “I don’t want to be unique and special.” And I don’t… that’s so… and of course, it’s like a gay pride thing too, but like, I can hear somebody saying, “I don’t want to stand out. I want to go to high school or junior high or be an adult and I want to be utterly unnoticeable.”
Jeremy: “why do I have to be different when I just want to fit in.”
Kolby: Right! And it’s just like, you don’t understand! You’re a miracle and you want to un-miracle yourself. So yes. So, I consequently, I judge that unicorn, I was like, “unicorn, you got to….” I was so sad; it’s making me teary eyed right now.
Jeremy: It was a good thing in the story though, from a story perspective, to almost go from this- it’s a broken leg, to a new dress, to progress to all of these deep psychological changes, or deep physical changes that would change your psychology. So, it was an interesting approach of the story to go from that minimum level to that maximum, “I want to completely change.”
Kolby: To a universally acceptable fix to a breast augmentation.
Jeremy: Nose augmentation.
Jessica: Nose augmentation.
Kolby: Nose augmentation. I want a bigger nose. What about the, I think it was a rabbit, that wanted better eyesight than he was born with, because he was born with cheap plastic eyes, and was like, “as long as you’re putting in new eyes, can put you in better eyes?”
Jessica: Look, if I could have better eyes, if I could not…
Kolby: Like, Geordi eyes from Star Trek.
Jessica: If I could not just correct my vision…
Jeremy: I was thinking Ghost in the Shell with the bionic eyes.
Jessica: If I could have, instead of 20/20, is it 40/20?
Kolby: 20/15. Like better than 20/20.
Jessica: I would absolutely. If the doctor was like, “hey, it’s the same price, which one do you want?” I’m going for the 20/15. I would absolutely try to have better eyes.
Kolby: Doesn’t that go a little against the idea of being accepting of…
Jessica: Well, am I making that choice, or am I making a choice for someone else?
Kolby: You’re making the choice for you.
Jessica: Then I get to decide that. I decide not to be medicated for ADD. I decide that too.
Kolby: So, you don’t judge the unicorn then is what you’re saying?
Jessica: I definitely don’t judge the unicorn. I don’t understand it.
Jeremy: But you have to not judge that decision.
Jessica: I don’t know. They don’t have cool parents like I am.
(laughter)
Kolby: Yea, like where did this unicorn parents… where are did all these doll’s parents go? Abandon them to some kid in a toy chest.
Jessica: Right. So, I don’t know how that person was raised. I don’t know what their day-to-day fight is. Just because I don’t medicate for ADD doesn’t mean that I judge people that do medicate for ADD. It’s their personal decision that clearly, they’re struggling with whatever they’re struggling with, and I have a different struggle.
Kolby: Jeremy, what would you think, if your daughter came to you and said, “I want fill-in-the-blank, breast augmentation…”
Jessica: “bigger better nose”
Kolby: “I want eyes that can see in the infrared as well.”
Jeremy: I struggle with the whole idea of them getting tattoos.
Kolby: That’s a great example.
Jessica: Whoa! They did get tattoos?
Kolby: One of them has one.
Jeremy: The older one. The other one just turned 18 is like, “as soon as I have money, tattoo time.”
Kolby: What is their tattoo? What does it say like, “live free or die” or something?
(laughter)
Kolby: Please tell me it’s, “live free or die” but in binary? That would be.
Jeremy: “Do Not Resuscitate”
(laughter)
Kolby: That would be like, that exactly is everything I know about your family if it’s binary or written in barcode.
Jessica: I was going to say in Elvish.
Kolby: If you can read this, go away?
(laughter)
Jeremy: No, I would have to be supportive, but try to play the devil’s advocate of like…
Kolby: It’s forever.
Jeremy: … “it’s forever. Do you really want to do this? Think about it, get good art at least, and find a good…”
Kolby: “Get good art at least. Get a good doctor.
Jeremy: “…get a good artist, the offer from the guy down the street on the corner, yea- don’t get his tattoos.”
Kolby: So, let me get this straight, let’s say your daughter’s 17, and she’s like, “look I need you to sign this slip, they won’t let me do it until they’re 18. Do you sign the slip?”
Jeremy: It really depends on what it is.
Kolby: So, now you’re curator of content.
Jeremy: Absolutely.
Kolby: Wow!
Jeremy: From that perspective.
Jessica: I think that’s okay, because at this point, you have such a responsibility as a parent.
Jeremy: Yes, that if you’re under 18, we really need to discuss the consequences of this and the more drastic the change… like, a tattoo at 17, yeah, you can get a tattoo. But if you want a gender transition, I mean, that’s why they really make you wait 2 years for a gender transition.
Jessica: Although, to bring it to newer science, a lot of newer science especially for gender transitioning, that because kids identify so early …
Kolby: It’s an easier transition.
Jessica: … it’s an easier transition to start when they’re children.
Jeremy: Okay.
Jessica: So, that again, is one of those things you have to judge as a parent, and as a parent, and decide. But I think if my daughter, who is amazing and awesome and has decent judgment…
Kolby: Your daughter is going to use this video, by the way, to get a tattoo now.
Jeremy: Oh, absolutely.
Jessica: Yeah, I know.
Jeremy: She’s already getting a tattoo. She’s 18.
Jessica: If at 16, she came to me and said she wanted a tattoo, I would say, “absolutely not. Nope.” And she would be like, “but mom, it’s 2 years, no biggie, just sign it.” I would say, “no.”
Kolby: What if she showed you the tattoo first?
Jessica: No, absolutely not.
Kolby: What if she wanted laser eye surgery? Like corrective eye surgery.
Jessica: I’d have to talk to a doctor, because there’s a lot of science about them growing and…
Kolby: I’m just saying in the hypothetical.
Jeremy: If a doctor was like, “yeah”, I’d be like “yeah, that’s cool.”
Kolby: But it’s forever. What if she wants to be… this one reminds me of the parents that have the deaf parents that have a deaf kid, that find if you get a cochlear implant right when you’re a baby, your brain rewires better and it’s more effective, and so you are choosing to help your child be in a hearing world as opposed to a deaf world, therefore sort of implicitly saying that…
Jessica: The hearing world is better.
Kolby: The hearing world is better.
Jessica: I don’t believe that. I was just saying…
Kolby: But that’s the implication.
Jessica: Or the reverse, that you are so, you know, the judgement is always that you are so involved in your culture, the deaf culture, that you are now hindering your child’s success because you won’t let them get a cochlear implant and go into the hearing world. It’s hard.
Kolby: But this goes back to your medication thing, about ADD.
Jessica: Different because medication can be stopped.
Kolby: That’s true. I suppose you can take out the thing off maybe. I don’t know, I don’t know how cochlear implants work.
Jessica: Well, so the problem that…. I’m not deaf and I don’t come from the this world… but I think probably the problem is that if you have a cochlear implant and you are in a hearing world, you are exposed to deaf culture, but not so big a part of it in the way you would if you did not have a cochlear implant.
Kolby: I don’t know. I struggle with…. This is one of the things I do like about this story is there’s so many shade of grey you can spin it off too from cochlear implant, to breast implants, to corrective vision, to nose things, I mean… all the way to whether it’s liposuction or whether it’s to whatever, and it’s just like, and at the core of it everyone sort of universally, or most people would say, you need to learn to accept yourself. You’re never going to find that last thing to make you happy.
Jessica: Right, but….
Jeremy: There’s lots of grey.
Jessica: There’s lots of grey.
Jeremy: The other side of it is, when you’re with somebody in a familiar relationship, you need to be supportive of their decisions and help them make those decisions if they’re really difficult. There’s a lot of extenuating situations around it. It depends on what it is.
Kolby: Okay, so Jeremy, just to tie it back to the story…
Jeremy: It depends.
Kolby: It depends. It should be the slogan for the show. None of the stuffed animal changes or refusal of changes you had an issue with?
Jeremy: No, I think…
Kolby: You’re cool with the giraffe getting a shorter neck?
Jeremy: Yeah.
Kolby: But isn’t he essentially changing his giraffe-ness?
Jeremy: Yes, but it’s a stuffed animal anyways.
Kolby: Way to not suspend disbelief man. Alright, and the unicorn you’re okay with?
Jeremy: Yes, disappointing but accepting.
Kolby: That’s how you should phrase it to your daughter when she wants to get a tattoo.
Jessica: Disappointed but accepting.
(laughter)
Kolby: I support you, I’m disappointed but I’m accepting.
Jessica: Well, and I want to point out, that’s also a very American thing.
Kolby: Disappointed by accepting?
(laughter)
Jessica: That’s also a very American thing. No, but I was going to say this idea of specialness, like this idea that you’re so unique and you’re special. There’s lots of cultures that special and uniqueness are something you do want to change. You want to be more… and I don’t want to say homogenous because that’s not fair, that is very judgy… but more part of the general society.
Kolby: And you’re speaking on averages of course. So, there are individual outliers in every culture.
Jessica: Absolutely.
Kolby: So, actually, I’ve had a million roommates over the years, and one of the roommates area of research was cultural, not anthropology, but cultural Darwinism… like how the same studies, when you take the same sort of various studies that have been done in the United States, all the ones that have been well known, and you have the exact same study done in another country. So, like, the prison experiment…
Jessica: Oh, so like a social science study.
Kolby: Yeah. You take the exact same prison experiment but you do it in China, or Japan, or India, or in Africa…
Jeremy: And see how cultural differences effect the study.
Kolby: Or you take…
Jessica: Degree’s I wish I would’ve gotten.
Kolby: The one that this person had talked to me about extensively was the one where they had the person push the button when the person gets the thing wrong, and it shocks them and they’re getting progressively higher shocks until they think that they’ve shocked them enough to where they could kill them. You do that in other places, and you don’t get the same results because the cultural sort-of norms… I’d be interested to know how this discussion took place in different cultures. Because I think you would find…
Jeremy: Different answers. Absolutely.
Jessica: And I think to come from a place of empathy, we have no idea where that unicorn was raised. We don’t know what forms his or hers every single day, and if that unicorn needs…
Kolby: If it’s just miserable every single day, they need to take care of that.
Jessica: And if they need to be a horse, let them be a horse, who cares? Yes, I am also disappointed, I definitely want them to love their uniqueness, but that’s also an American mom talking, and not somebody from a different culture.
Kolby: Or somebody who is struggling.
Jessica: Or somebody that’s struggling.
Kolby: Yeah, that’s a good point. Alright. I think we actually covered all of our questions. I feel like our questions are very heavy pickaxe when we really need like a scalpel but that’s okay.
(laughter)
Kolby: Yea, I think we got all of them… sad bear…. Yeah…. Ah… cool.
Jessica: Wait, if there was one thing you could magically fix about you or improve things to make you better, what would you change? What would you change Kolby?
Kolby: If I could magically wave a wand and fix something about myself…
Jessica: I mean, I have a list for you.
(laughter)
Kolby: I’m sure you do. You know, I’m going to go deep rather than shallow.
Jessica: Ooooo….
Kolby: If I could somehow magically be more empathetic and less engineer-y, I definitely feel like, and this is totally a self-diagnostic, I feel like I’m a little bit on a spectrum and that I see things in a very sort of analytic, like the number of people’s names I don’t know. It’s comical, I just don’t know so many people’s names and it’s because your name is not relevant to who you are. I can tell you your job, I can tell you your thing, I can tell whether you’re judgy, I can tell you 50 things that are relevant to my interactions with you, your name is not one of them. And so, I just don’t know anyone name. I wish I could be less engineer-y, spectrum-y like that and I think that empathy would make me a better person. But I would like to be able to turn that off and on. Because growing up the way I’ve grown up, I understand that this is difficult for you, I feel that I should understand that, but in this case- let me flip the switch- I don’t care.
(laughter)
Kolby: I would like to be able to do that. That would be my “if I could pick something.”
Jessica: Wow.
Kolby: Like, sometimes the bricks just need to get laid and I don’t care if you’ve got an existential crisis about being a brick layer.
Jessica: Just so you know, we empathetic people don’t go around not laying bricks, just FYI.
(laughter)
Kolby: I wouldn’t even know. I have no idea! Jeremy, do you have a…
Jeremy: At the moment, I don’t have anything I would want to change.
Kolby: Flawless.
Jeremy: No, not flawless. I grew up with flaws.
Kolby: What about the grey?
Jeremy: Oh yea, I’d like a full beard.
Jessica: A full beard? Really?
Jeremy: Yeah, it’s very patchy.
Jessica: I cannot imagine you with a full beard.
Jeremy: Think Leonidas from 300.
(laughter)
Kolby: Oh my god, that’d be…. wait a minute!
(laughter)
Kolby: Wait a minute, you want the beard but not the abs?
(laughter)
Kolby: That’s how I know you work in the tech field.
Jeremy: Yes.
Kolby: Jessica, do you have a magic wand?
Jeremy: She wants a beard like Leonidas too.
Jessica: I want a Leonidas beard.
(laughter)
Jessica: I think I have definitely a whole list.
Kolby: You have a list?
Jessica: I definitely. Because I’m a woman.
Kolby: I don’t even have a list for you. I don’t even have one thing for you.
Jessica: But I grew up a little…
Kolby: Maybe if you gave me a little bit of a break every once in a while, that would be my list for you.
(laughter)
Jessica: I think because I’m a woman, I definitely have a lot of things that society has told me that I have to change.
Kolby: Just scatter those Cosmo’s around the house for your daughter to read?
Jessica: yes, right. Yeah. I mean, there’s lots of things that would have made my life easier in society being a woman if things could change. If I was thinner, I mean, if I had any bigger boobs I’d fall over. A lot of things that are very superficial. I probably would like to be, and this is just me being greedy, I would love to be smarter. I’m pretty darn smart, but gosh, if I could be even smarter, I’d be… ah, maybe I’d be evil. Maybe I don’t want that.
(laughter)
Jessica: I’m so close to evil…
Jeremy: You got to ramp up the empathy too, and then you won’t be evil.
Jessica: Right, maybe that would be it.
Kolby: There’s like a cat discussion going on.
Jeremy: There’s a cat in the box.
Kolby: There’s a cat in the box?
Jeremy: In the overturned box over there.
Kolby: Is that what it is?
Jeremy: I think so.
Kolby: Really? You have been listening to After Dinner Conversation, short stories for long discussions. You can find these stories on Amazon to download, they’re all e-books as well as on our website Afterdinnerconversation.com. You can listen to podcasts and YouTube videos and all of those things. Please like and subscribe if you have an enjoyed this. It’ll make our lives happier. It’ll keep Jessica from medicating herself apparently.
Jessica: Sure.
Kolby: Fixing whatever, I don’t know.
Jessica: I won’t fix anything.
Kolby: Promises. Once again, we are at La Gattara. All of the cats you hear screeching behind us having cat discussions, are up for adoption.
Jessica: There’s this one named Hemingway you should totally come adopt him.
Kolby: He has a bowtie.
Jessica: He has a bowtie.
Kolby: Yeah. In Tempe, Arizona. So please stop by. At the very least, even if you don’t want one, for $10 or $5, whatever it is, you can come and just hang out with all the cats and that way you can find out if you’re allergic before you get one.
Jessica: Or which one you like.
Kolby: Or which one you like or which one likes you because it’s about consent.
Jessica: No, make Hemmingway cat like me.
Kolby: I’m so woke. Alright. Thank you for watching and we will see you next week when we are discussing, Jeremy you’re doing another marathon…
Jeremy: “Are You Him”
Kolby: “Are You Him” a man on his way to work finds a young woman in need of a friend. And you probably have like, some paragraph’s’ going on there.
(laughter)
Kolby: There’s lots of cat talking going on. Alright thank you for joining us. Have a great day.
E5. "Pretty Pragmatism" - Can a good idea come from a horrible source?
STORY SUMMARY: The story takes place around a Senator who has proposed a bill that would require mandatory service for kids. He got the idea from the Nazi party, but means well in that it will get kids outside and teach them the value of volunteering. The bill goes over very badly and he now faces a formal censure from the Senate. He compromise is made and quietly withdraws the bill, in support of a supporting additions to the proposed annual budget.
DISCUSSION: Story does a good job of showing all the good things that came from sources that don’t live up to modern standards of morality. Does that mean we toss those ideas out, or those people out of our history books? Perhaps we simply teach a more complete version of history where people are not idealized. Even when we tell our history and role models to children, the explanations should be more complete. Can a good person have a good idea? Is a person all one thing, or all another? Singers and comedy people may be horrible people in real life, but does that make the art of lower quality?
BOOK LINK: Download the accompanying short story here.
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SUPPORT: Support us on Patreon.
“Can a good idea come from a horrible source?”
Kolby, Jeremy, and Jessica discuss the ethics in the short story, “Pretty Pragmatism” by Jenean McBrearty.
Transcript (By: Transcriptions Fast)
Pretty Pragmatism
Kolby: Hi and welcome back once again to After Dinner Conversation. After Dinner Conversation is a website and podcasts that promote critical thinking and socializing with your friends and talking about ethical things. We are once again today in La Gattara.
Jeremy: La Gattara.
Kolby: Finally, I’m getting it right. Where they have cats for adoption. I was going to say for purchase.
(laughter)
Kolby: Because you do have to pay for them; they don’t just give you the cats.
Jessica: It’s an adoption fee though.
Kolby: Give me this cat. They’ve got this cute cat right here. Very cute kitty.
Jessica: It’s not cat trafficking.
Kolby: Yeah.
(laughter)
Kolby: Yes, it’s not cat trafficking. That would be terrible.
Jeremy: That might make a good story.
Kolby: That cat trafficker. So, we’ll continue to do this. If you enjoy it, please like or share as our cat goes right in our camera. Alright, you’re going to get demoted kitten. Please like or share, feel free to submit them. You can buy these e-books wherever e-books are sold, Amazon, whatever, all the places that they go, so you can read along with us. I am your co-host Kolby. I am here with Jeremy.
Jeremy: Hi, I’m Jeremy.
Kolby: I see you remembered to talk this time instead of just waving.
(laughter)
Kolby: It’s the worst podcast voice ever. And Jessica....
Jessica: Hello.
Kolby: …who is going to be joining us for the next bunch of episodes. Ashley is on, what we call sabbatical? What’s she doing? Triathlon stuff?
Jessica: She needs a break.
Kolby: She needs a break from Jeremy and I.
(laughter)
Kolby: But she’ll be back I’m sure to taunt us incessantly. Our story, it’s already that kind of day, so our story, “Pretty Pragmatism” by Jenean McBrearty.
Jessica: McBrearty.
Kolby: McBrearty. We’re going to go with that, is our first story. And I think Jeremy you’ve got a story summary and you wrote your story summary.
Jeremy: I wrote a story summary this time. I was disappointed with our previous story summaries.
Kolby: Way to bring your A game there, man. Nice. Let’s hear it.
Jeremy: So, our story opens with Senator Sal Boundini talking to a senior staffer, Rob, about the merits of hiring a press secretary based on her looks and introducing a bill proposing compulsory national service.
Kolby: You got to talk slower dude. I’m barely following that.
Jeremy: Okay. Sal and Rob bounce between these seemingly unrelated topics as they prepare Sal for an appearance before the Senate Ethics Committee. Apparently the idea of requiring two years of public service...
Kolby: Are you going to read all that?
Jeremy: Yeah.
Kolby: Dude. Less...
Jessica: Let him read it.
Kolby: Alright, I’ll let him read it. That’s a lot dude. That’s a lot.
Jeremy: So apparently...
Jessica: Don’t be micromanager. Back off.
Kolby: Alright. Sorry.
Jeremy: Two years of public service in the National Parks isn’t sitting well with the Ethics Committee because it was founded by an Italian fascist and was the basis for Germany’s Hilter Jugend or Nazi Youth Party. Sal argues that rich people send their kids to summer camps, why can’t poor people do the same? But Rob counters that it’s not the idea that’s bad, but the source of the idea that’s bad. Rob ends a conversation with advice to not make Senator Whitcomb, presumably the committee chair, mad at Sal since she already thinks he’s a pig. The next scene opens at the end of Sal’s chewing out by the committee where they have basically accused him on proposing child servitude or prison indoctrination camps ending with Whitcomb questioning if Sal was lazy, stupid, a fascist, or all three. Nonplussed Sal spends the next two paragraphs arguing that all good policies spring from other people’s earlier good ideas, mixing examples from fascists and non-fascists alike. This is the crux of the story; can good ideas come from discredited sources? And secondarily, does this matter more in politics, where everything can be used against you in the election cycle? Scene ends with an unappeased Whitcomb recommending censure. In the final scene we see Sal pondering the potential implications of the committee decision. Next, a note from Rob that he’s fired Roxy, the aforementioned press secretary, prompting thoughts of retirement for Sal. Rob reappears then with news that due to a loss of votes, Senator Whitcomb is willing to drop the censure if he’ll vote for her budget bill. Elated, Sal and Rob celebrate his win ending with the revelation that Sal had dumped Whitcomb for Roxy tying our plot points together and adding additional motive for Sal’s proposed censure. The story ends with Sal adding to his Washington memoir equating the strength of good ideas with the strength of the writer of those ideas.
Kolby: Wow.
Jessica: That is an excellent, excellent, excellent story.
Kolby: When you told me that it took you a half hour to write, I was like, “how could it take you a half hour to write a summary?” And now...
Jeremy: Because it’s a summary.
Jessica: Because it’s a summary.
Kolby: I totally, get, yeah. When it’s my turn to summarize, you need to have lower expectations.
(laughter)
Kolby: Much. You’re going to get, like, “it’s like Jaws in space”, that’s what you’re going to get from me.
Jeremy: Nice. That’s your summary.
Kolby: That’s “Alien” by the way.
Jeremy: Yes, it is.
Kolby: Okay.
Jeremy: Wait, so who’s the old boat pilot?
Kolby: I don’t know. Sigourney Weaver? I’m not sure. No she can’t. I don’t know, man.
(Laughter)
Jeremy: That’s a different topic. Anyways...
Kolby: So, basically, it’s about a senator who tries to create mandatory two-year youth camps. Like, two-year service things.
Jeremy: Right. And it’s unclear whether it’s...
Kolby: And did he intentionally steal the idea from the Nazi Party or did he find out later, after he came up with the idea? Like, “Oh, yea, that’s what the Nazi party did.”
Jeremy: I think it was unclear. I think it was just an idea. It’s unclear whether he stole the idea or took the idea from earlier writings or came up on his own and just happens to match earlier good ideas.
Kolby: It’s interesting because Jessica and I were talking about this on the way in that she does a Girl Scout Troop.
Jessica: I do a Girl Scout Troop.
Kolby: And one of the things that this story reminded me of, is that people don’t really know.... see, even when I move my bag, the cat goes to my bag to vomit on it....
(laughter)
Kolby: …was that actually the Boy Scouts of America are, low and behold, formed right around World War II, because they are a response to Hilter’s youth things.
Jeremy: When I was doing research on this one, there was originally issues with the Boy Scout party at the same time because of that connection.
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: And it’s not like this is unprecedented. The Boy Scouts is a version of what they were doing in World War II. That’s interesting. At any rate, I’m curious what did you think Jessica? Welcome to the show by the way.
Jessica: Well, thank you Kolby.
Kolby: You’re a rock star. We flew you in special.
Jessica: You did fly me in special.
Kolby: Like brie, right?
Jessica: I was going to say, “like a cleaner.”
Kolby: Oh yeah.
(laughter)
Jeremy: Like Jean Reno.
Jessica: Yeah
Jeremy: Here with your trench coat and bag of acid.
Jessica: To clean up with mess....
(laughter)
Jessica: I’m just kidding.
(laughter)
Jessica: I think it’s interesting. I have a former life in politics, so I have a lot of experience dealing with how…
Kolby: That’s right! You worked on people’s database things or whatever.
Jessica: Yea, I worked for a company that did database software for campaigns so I worked with a lot of politicians and you know, spin is a big part of that. Contributions and who’s contributing and how they’re going to spend that is a big part… do the ends justify the means kind of thing. And I think that story is a little bit at the heart of that. Especially when we have Whitcomb, the senator who is putting the censure on Senator Sal is, you know, at the end she is asking for a vote. She’s basically saying, “I will step aside and I will not censure you on something that I think is completely wrong as long as I get what I want in the end.”
Jeremy: As long as I get what II want for my constituents.
Jessica: Right.
Kolby: It’s still horse-trading.
Jessica: It’s still horse-trading and although there’s a romantic relationship that complicates the story as well, I think it’s a very interesting, like, my ethics are very strong until I need a vote to pass my bill. And then there’s always the question, is a censure worth people’s jobs? How do you value those ideas? So, I think it’s an interesting story in that way. I struggle a lot with this subject because especially being a writer, we have lots of artists especially in the last 10 years, whose art has been brought into question because of sexual harassment, or because of pedophilia…
Kolby: Dropping like flies.
Jessica: Right. So, the question always comes us is like, “does the actions negate the art?” And I think a lot of times, when there’s a good idea, does the source of it negate the good idea-ness of it? And I think sometimes it absolutely does. I think one of the things this story reminds me of is in politics, when there is a quote-unquote good idea, but “oh, it was associated with something bad or someone bad”, a lot of times we don’t take it out of the, “oh, it was this person’s idea” and then talk about how did, for example, in the camps, Nazi youth camps aren’t a good idea. I don’t care.
(laughter)
Jeremy: Well when you put it that way.
Kolby: You can’t call it a Nazi youth camp; you have to call it a “Pre-World War II Exercise Facility.” You’ve got to rename it. It’s all branding.
Jessica: Right, but even in the re-branding, we don’t carry the four. So, mandatory youth camps are great if you’re completely able-bodied, you’re not homosexual, you’re not introverted, you’re not… right? All these things are great ideas until you carry the idea farther down and then it becomes, yes, the big reveal happens. So, yes, what a great idea. Summer camps.
Kolby: I think there are two things you’re talking about there. One is, can a good idea come from a bad source? And number two, in this story was having these camps even a good idea? And it sounds like you’re for sure on the having a mandatory camp isn’t a good idea.
Jessica: Correct.
Kolby: And I kind of agree with that. Although I do think mandatory service is not necessarily a bad thing.
Jeremy: Not necessarily bad. And the whole idea from Sal’s point of view, it’s getting people out in the National Parks to do things. Maintenance of the parks, not necessarily a “youth camp.” But it depends on how you spin that and really what is the goal of the bill. Is it to national service where people are doing things for the common good?
Kolby: Like free labor for the government, for the common good?
Jeremy: Right.
Kolby: Maybe that’s what he should’ve called it, “Free labor for the government for the common good.”
(laughter)
Kolby: F-C-C-P whatever CA….
Jessica: I feel like no party would object at all to that.
Kolby: What about, does it it…
Jessica: Wait, wait, I want to add one thing. It’s not that I think this is a bad idea, although I do think it’s a terrible idea. What I’m saying though, is a lot of times is we don’t learn from our history so looking at the Nazi camps and Sal does in the story, he goes and he looks at those before and after pictures of those weakling kids and then at a 6 pack…
Kolby: And why are there 3 kids less? What? Weird? We started with 20 kids in the camp and we finished with 17. So odd.
Jessica: And I think that’s where we get lost. A lot of times we’ll say, “oh, it’s a good idea no matter where it came from.” But we don’t explore the bad idea part of it in the historical context. Yeah, these were a bad idea and why and how could that play out in our version of this idea?
Jeremy: Really. And that’s the important part of, or what should be the important part of this discussion is what are the merits of the idea good and bad? As opposed to where it came from, which is a logical fallacy anyways.
Kolby: Which is what the story and all the politics is related and where the idea came from. There’s no discussion at all…
Jeremy: On if it’s a good idea.
Kolby: Right.
Jessica: Well, and I think, that’s just human nature. Every idea Kolby comes us with, I’m immediately going to say it’s a bad idea.
Kolby: It’s a terrible idea.
(laughter)
Jessica: You gotta argue with me that it’s a good idea.
Jessica: And yet, you still got on a plane.
(laughter)
Kolby: I’m going to tangent, half a tangent for a second, years ago a friend of mind was, I suppose they still are, an economist. And got PhD in economy and came here as a German guy, blah blah blah, whole thing. And I asked him, “look, I’ve never understood, in the middle of the great depression, a world-wide great depression the 1930s, the United States a wreck, Europe is a wreck, every place is a wreck, Hitler somehow creates economic policies that creates a massive, not just military, but recovered economy surrounded by shattered economies including the United States. And the only thing that gets the United Stated out of the Great Depression is the government spending on war efforts to fight Germany and fight Japan. So surely…
Jeremy: There’s a lesson in here.
Kolby: Yeah. Besides the fact of “don’t be horrible,” there must be some economic lesson on how you boot strap your own country out of a world-wide depression when there is nobody in the world to sell too because everyone’s in a bad shape. And so, I asked this German economist guy who’s staying with me at this time, I asked him, “how was this studied?” And he said, “we don’t.” And I’m like, “what do you mean you don’t?” He’s like, “nobody studied it. It would be academic suicide to study something that the Hitler Germany did to understand why it was good.” He’s like, “so we don’t.”
Jeremy: Because there’s so much bad involved.
Kolby: Because there’s so much bad about it. So, I’m like, “You don’t even know how they did it?” He’s like, “Well, we roughly know.” I’m like, “did anyone get a PhD in figuring it out?” And he’s like, “no, probably not.”
Jessica: To be fair…
Kolby: I mean, he was German.
Jessica: To be fair, I think there’s also the human instinct to…
Kolby: The wretch instinct?
Jessica: I was going to say, to take something half-cocked and not understood and run with it as a platform, is so utterly scary, I absolutely wouldn’t study it, because some jerk is going pick that up and say, “hey, the way to economic recovery is to repress and genocide a bunch of people.” And some politicians, is going to be like, “yea, that’s not such a bad idea.”
Jeremy: “I’d get on board with that because it keeps us in power.”
Kolby: That’s how you go from Darwin to eugenics.
Jessica: Exactly, this is exactly how you go from Darwin to eugenics.
Kolby: I think that’s fair.
Jessica: That’s fair. If I was Germany, I’d be like “guys, just shut it down.”
(Laughter)
Jessica: Whatever might have been good, I don’t even care. I don’t want anybody rehabilitating this movement. Of course, that did not work.
Kolby: Yet, you sent your kid to kindergarten. Let’s just be clear.
Jessica: Well, my kid goes to a German bi-lingual school so….
(laughter)
Kolby: Your political career is over!
Jessica: I was never going to get into politics anyways. I’m a horrible person.
Kolby: Jeremy, let me ask you a question. One of the things that comes up is the guy goes through a listing of good ideas from other sources.
Jeremy: Certainly.
Kolby: I think he talks about the autobahn and a couple other ones. There’s some he didn’t even mention, like the little BMW symbol is a helicopter, is a propeller, because they made war planes for German. I think it’s BMW, it might’ve been Mercedes.
Jeremy: Mercedes.
Kolby: Yeah. Do you think it’s okay to take ideas that are either military ideas or war ideas or all the sort of research that came out of human limitations that were done on concentration camp people, it’s still data, do you think they throw it away?
Jessica: Wait, how do you know its valid data?
Jeremy: Right, you don’t.
Jessica: We just know its data. We don’t know if its valid or not.
Kolby: That’s true. But the example they use in the story is the rocket technology. I want to be clear there was an American who did rocketry first and but Germany continued that from his work, and then we basically gave them all a free pass and was like, “look, if you’ll come to America, we’ll just say you were doing Nazi work and you didn’t have a choice.” And now we have a rocket program. Do you blank that to keep a clean moral slate, or you okay, like, “you were bad but you were bad but useful”?
Jeremy: That’s ethically questionable and the government is typically not very good at that, and they will just blanketly allow SS scientists to come to the US and work in the atomic program and the rocket programs, even though they did bad things.
Jessica: Although I think it’s defiantly more prevalent in government, I do think that’s true for a lot of sectors. Like the guy who invented cardiac catheters, the one that goes up the vein and into the heart, he did it on himself first.
Kolby: What?
Jessica: Yep, his name is Werner Forssmann.
Kolby: That’s Frankenstein stuff.
Jessica: Yeah. He got fired for it.
Kolby: And then he got a Nobel Prize for it, probably.
Jessica: He did! He did get a Nobel Prize for it! Shut the front door. Thank you “imager(?)” for reminding me of this. But he...
Kolby: I wonder how many people got a Nobel Prize for something they got fired for? He’s got to be it?
Jeremy: No. I’m sure there’s more.
Kolby: Madame Curie.
Jessica: But what I was going to say is that, he did that and then he joined the Nazi Party.
Kolby: Really?
Jessica: Right? And so, we as a medical community, of course, we’re not going to just be like, “hey, forget it, were not going to cardiac catheter, that’s probably not good because it came from a Nazi.”
Kolby: So, do you think there’s a distinction between medical and scientific sort of separation, versus political separation? So, if you come up with the version of the something catheter…?
Jessica: Cardiac catheter.
Kolby: So, if you come up with the political theory version of the cardiac catheter, do you chuck that opinion out because it’s a different world in politics?
Jeremy: Politics and finances and economics. Which is what we’re saying…
Kolby: So, you’d say yes then?
Jeremy: Because they’re much more a public sector, there is a larger impression and it’s much more visible. In politics, because of the election cycle, everything you do it brought forth.
Kolby: Aren’t we kind of glad that scientists don’t follow that same rule otherwise you wouldn’t have a cardiac catheter?
Jeremy: We wouldn’t have a rocket program.
Kolby: Right. So, if it’s good enough for science, why isn’t that good enough for economics?
Jessica: Okay, but here’s the thing, we have to be careful even in science because they we start saying anything for science as long as it advances humanity, therefor it’s valid. And then we get Henrietta Lacks and the woman whose DNA, I’m going to mess this up, sorry internet, Henrietta Lacks, there’s a whole book on it, there’s a really great radio lab podcast on it.
Jeremy: I think I’ve heard this the same way.
Jessica: Her DNA, her cells in her body, she was dying of a disease, a uterine clot or something, and a sample was taken without consent, and it now is the basis of almost all the vaccine science in the world. Henrietta Lacks. She’s amazing. She died. Nothing was ever attributed to her, her family received no financial gain, she was a poor black woman, and she was taken advantage of.
Kolby: Of course, she was. Let me guess, in Alabama or something.
Jessica: Exactly. And so, again, it’s that anything for science. Without Henrietta Lacks, we would not be where we are today medically. However…
Jeremy: There’s still ethical issues with what they did.
Jessica: There’s still big ethical issues and we should have done it right and instead we did not. And so, that always is going to concern me. Yes, we should learn from bad people. Hello, there’s cat fighting.
Kolby: There’s cat fighting going on.
Jessica: They’re displeased with this line of inquiry.
Kolby: I feel like any cat not named Logan is a wasted opportunity. I gotta be honest.
(laughter)
Kolby: I’m just going to throw that out there right now.
Jessica: My nephew is names Logan.
Jeremy: But your nephew isn’t a cat.
Kolby: Or Krueger. Krueger would work too. Not the park, the horror guy. Sorry.
Jessica: Anyway, I think that’s a slippery-slope. I think that is to say, “oh, as long as it’s science or medicine,” because again, medicine is one of those, how much did we learn from horrible experimentation or the repression, especially black women in the United States, the whole OBGYN field is just marred with terrible atrocities that we never ever recognize. So, I think I have a problem with that.
Jeremy: Right, but the other side of the, basically critical thinking in the scientific process, is that you’re building on previous work and so people aren’t always, I would assume in science, looking at who did the work, they’re just looking at the work, reproducing the experiments, or building on that research. And so, there’s a disconnect between who did the research and the research itself.
Kolby: So, I don’t necessarily disagree, but I’m just going to throw blood in the water.
Jessica: We’ll tell you when you’re wrong.
Kolby: I feel like there’s an understanding then, that when it comes to physics, when it comes to medicine, that truth until we know better truth exists. Like, we know that Newtonian physics is correct until we get Einstein-ian physics and then we know that’s correct until we get…. And truth simply exists. So, I don’t know why that belief of like, “well truth exists but I’m going to take a pass on these other ideas because I don’t like where they came from because I question their motivation in gathering truth.”
Jessica: I think probably because the scientific method does exist.
Kolby: As opposed to politics where it’s just the sausage method.
Jeremy: Yes.
Jessica: Right, and it’s a lot of PR and a lot of spin and it’s a lot of what was society ready for at the time and what are they not? I think trying to apply that to art, why did Edgar Allen Poe die penniless and alone? Why did that happen when he was so popular later on?
Kolby: That makes sense in politics and art, truth is a much more fluid thing.
Jessica: And very nuanced and dependent on a lot of things. I still think that’s true for science. I just think we do a better of sussing it out. When you were talking about the data for the Holocaust victims and you said, “validated.” And I said, “how do we know it’s valid?”
Kolby: Sure. We try and reproduce it but we can’t.
Jessica: We can’t. So, I think it goes back to that as well.
Kolby: Jeremy, generally what did you think of the story? Like it, dislike it, did you find it interesting?
Jeremy: It’s pretty well written, the points that it brings up are good. I feel like there could have been more research done, or research presented in his argument as opposed to the pretty well-known ones that were provided.
Kolby: And nobody ever talks about the caffeine pills and all the speed that they gave all the pilots and the people in German.
Jeremy: Right, they were all on meth.
Kolby: I just read a stat a little while ago that when they figured out how many meth pills that they were giving out, that it worked out to like, 2 a week per soldier. Millions, hundreds of millions of them were produced. And we don’t really talk about any of that. What about the idea? Not necessarily the go away to camp, but the idea of some mandatory…
Jeremy: Mandatory national service.
Kolby: Mandatory national service. And that’s not necessarily saying that it has to be going to this guy’s idea, but you could go be a lifeguard or whatever the government thinks they need you for.
Jeremy: Exactly. And because the government is running it, it’s going to be fraught with problems.
(laughter)
Kolby: Yes, of course.
Jessica: I mean, way to bring some reality to it.
Kolby: And corruption and nepotism.
Jeremy: Yes. I’ve talked to people from Israel where they go through…
Kolby: Turkey also does mandatory service.
Jeremy: And there’s a lot of countries where people are involved with national service and sometimes it’s, honestly, I was in the Army and there’s a lot of…
Kolby: That could’ve been 2 years national service what you were doing, right?
Jeremy: Absolutely. It was not a glamorous job and really there’s too many people and it was fraught with issues as well, even though it wasn’t compulsory. So, because it’s run by the government.
Kolby: Sure…
(cat meow)
Jessica: Oh, did you guys hear that? There’s a cat fight.
Kolby: There’s a government fight going on over there.
Jessica: I think it’s a fight over the litter box? Which is a very bad scene.
Kolby: You don’t want to be the one waiting for the port-a-potty.
(laughter)
Kolby: You don’t want that world.
Jessica: Get into a fist fight waiting for the port-a-potty.
Kolby: I think, it’s particularly for Jessica and I, you’ll find an audience that’s like, “when government does something, it tends to be bloated and inefficient and corrupt.” But, does that mean it’s not worth doing? So even if you’ve only got 70% efficiency, you might still get the levee built.
Jeremy: Absolutely and I think you see that a lot in the depression area or the Roosevelt’s programs. There were a lot of good programs that came about from that, that were the same ideas. Some sort of national service work programs.
Kolby: I still see, every once in a while, when you walk on a sidewalk, you can see the stamp in the sidewalk, the CCC stamp or whatever, because the sidewalk was built as part of a work-labor program. But they didn’t wall it a labor-camp, they knew better.
(laughter)
Kolby: Yea, they knew better.
Jessica: What you’re talking about also was not just for young people coming out of high school.
Kolby: It was for unemployed adults, there an Unemployment Program.
Jessica: It’s a program which is very different from compulsory service.
Kolby: Yea, no, that’s right. I feel like there’s a branding issue with this for sure.
Jessica: And not even just a branding issue, but make compulsory… I don’t know if you met me, but you tell me that you want me to do something, my first instinct is to do the opposite. So, to tell me, “you have to do this thing for 2 years”… I love the national parks. If you told me I had to work in the national parks for 2 years, I’d be a jerk about it.
Kolby: Just because you told me too.
Jessica: Just because you told me too.
Kolby: Yeah. I feel that’s a very American trait.
Jessica: And whatever, it’s a very Jessica trait. But I don’t think the government shouldn’t be in a position to tell you what to do, especially for two very prime years of life.
Jeremy: Right. You could…
Kolby: Like 18-20 or something…
Jeremy: We could probably spend another half an hour arguing about ways to improve that program, but still, it’s not going to please everybody no matter what you do.
Jessica: Yeah.
Kolby: Alright, let me finish one last question. Jessica, you’re going to get it since you’re our new guest. Do you think that learning more about the person can diminish the legacy of their idea? So, Martin Luther King is famously, or maybe infamously, known as a womanizer that we found out later. That does not mean he’s not Martin Luther King. Henry Ford actually went and visited Hitler in Germany and talked about and he believe in eugenics and he believed in what he was doing, but that doesn’t mean we don’t build things on an assembly line.
Jessica: Correct.
Jeremy: And again, it’s a logical fallacy to condemn someone’s ideas because of who they are or what they’ve done outside of that idea. The idea has merit in itself.
Jessica: It does. What I will say is….
Kolby: Nobody is going to be listening to R-kelly pretty soon.
Jessica: We can only hope.
(laughter)
Kolby: Agreed. I actually didn’t even know who he was.
Jessica: I think the thing that we have to steer away from, is I feel like it’s this binary.
Kolby: Bad guys or good guys.
Jessica: Either it’s 100% their ideas and the person are amazing, or they’re all trash. And I think that…
Kolby: The Christopher Columbus sort of thing.
Jessica: We have to get away from heroes. Heroes is the biggest problem we have. Martin Luther King and his womanizing, should be part of…
Jeremy: His legacy.
Jessica: The whole story of Martin Luther King. Dr. Seuss had cheated on his first wife, she committed suicide over it.
Kolby: Really?
Jessica: Yep. Theodor Geisel. He married his second wife and lived a very long, loving life with her. And I don’t judge, I don’t know that situation, I don’t judge that, but knowing that history gives me a full complete picture, a fuller completer picture or Theodor Geisel than just Dr. Seuss who just wrote books.
Kolby: Let me ask a follow up question. That was going to be the last question, but that’s such a good answer, I want to ask one follow up question. What about the fact that learning history and learning our past is a little bit of an onion process in that when you’re in second grade you don’t say, “Columbus discovered American and genocide and rape and disease and wiped out a 1/3 of the population, brought back people to show off as objects, and died thinking that he had found India because he literally didn’t know he’d found a new continent on his deathbed.” You don’t cram all that into a 2nd grader.
Jessica: No, but I think, and Jeremy I’ll let you answer as well, sorry, I just totally ran into…. I think….
Kolby: Can you start off with “Columbus started America” and then just by 9th and 10th grade be like “and he was a horrible human being”?
Jessica: I think you have to tease a little. Like, when Jeremy was reading the story and he talked about the research on it, that was because something peaked his interested. He was like, “I wanna learn a little bit more.” I think you can tell as a mom of a 3rd grader; you can tell the Christopher Columbus story and the terrible things that happened with Christopher Columbus and the Native Americans.
Kolby: You just start getting that in at age appropriate level.
Jessica: Absolutely. You don’t have to go and tell horrible…
Jeremy: In an age-appropriate way.
Jessica: You don’t have to go into horrible detail, but you have to give them… because here’s what happens: they grow up and think you lied to them and that’s a much worse place to be. Whereas instead, you were like, “remember when I told you about Christopher Columbus and the horrible stuff that happened to the Native American’s because of his arrival? Great. Let’s move onto the next…” right? And that’s more intriguing to them than “Christopher Columbus was the best!”
Kolby: Jeremy, you’re nodding yes?
Jeremy: Yes. I would agree. It’s the same way. There are age-appropriate ways to introduce that information and it should all be presented in that fashion.
Kolby: From that start in an age-appropriate way.
Jeremy: Yea, I think so.
Kolby: That’s fair.
Jeremy: And I think it would be very good for, again, from a hero perspective that if we were presented all of these people we get from history, every single one of them did questionable things.
Jessica: Absolutely!
Kolby: Then doesn’t that make studying something like this and the Senator’s idea… if it wasn’t heroes and villains, then his idea is no longer lumped in the villain category, and then it can be discussed in a more rational way.
Jeremy: Exactly.
Jessica: It’s still a bad idea.
Kolby: And Jessica is working at a national park.
Jessica: No, I’m not.
Kolby: Alright. Well, we’re going to wrap it up there. You’ve been listening to After Dinner Conversation with myself Kolby and Jeremy and Jessica. After Dinner Conversation is a series of short stories for long discussions about ethics and morality and all the things we’ve been doing today. We hope that you have the same conversations that we have with your friends. All of these stories can be purchased and reviewed on e-books, at Amazon, you can get these podcasts at all sorts of place where podcasts are, I think they’re everywhere now. And if you’ve enjoyed this, please subscribe, please like this. One, it makes us feel good but also it gives us the ability to do more of these and to leverage this and to have more exciting topics that we talk about. It really does help and adopt a cat.
Jessica: Adopt a cat.
Kolby: Adopt a cat.
Jessica: And what’s the website?
Kolby: That’s a great question. Afterdinnerconversation.com and if you go on Amazon and type in “After Dinner Conversation”, a whole array, there’s dozens of these books up now. And next week, I forgot, we’re talking about “As You Wish” and Jessica you’re going to go our summary. Did you type up a 3-paragraph summary for next week?
(laughter)
Jessica: I will for next week.
Kolby: You will for next week?
Jessica: I will for next week.
Kolby: “As You Wish” is a story of an elderly woman who finds a trunk of tattered stuffed animals and makes a promise to fix them all. It’s a genuinely a children’s story, unlike the one we just did. So, join us next episode. Thank you.

